"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, Who is in you, Whom you have received from God? ... So use every part of your body to give glory back to God..." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

A little Piece of me. HOMEless-

A house is made
of brick and mortar,
but home is made
by the people who
live there."
M. K. Soni

Home is where the Heart it:
As I looked at Alec I questioned what I had done. For ten weeks we had a For Sale sign on our home. And for months I  had been preparing the house to put it on the market.
We had to be out of our house in 2 days and we had no home purchased in its place.
Together Andy and I had raised both our boys in this house. Alec came home from the hospital here.
Alec knew no other.
With almost everything off the walls and out of the house except the junk and dirt left to clean I saw Alec.
Alec was hunkered down sitting on the bottom of the steps. His little body looked so lonely while I just cleaned around him.
I stopped and just stared at him. He felt my attention and looked up at me. His eyes were glossed over with his lips quivering. My throat got a big knot in it. I slowly walked towards him. I reached my arms around him only to feel his head bury itself into my chest.
"Mommm, I don't want to leave." He cried. "We have so many memories here." He whimpered.
I held him tighter as I found myself tearing up alongside him. His little body shook in my arms.
I searched for the perfect words in vain. I wanted words of comfort and wisdom. "Alec, this house will give someone else great memories and we will make more memories in our next house."
It sounded so cliché.
We lived here for 12 years. Some of the most instrumental years of my life were in this house.
"What if I made a mistake?" I silently questioned.
Just that morning Andy was walking out the door to go to work. He was very agitated. The last few days had really taken a toll on him. Right before Andy walked out the door for work he snapped at me. He wanted me to hang  pictures on the wall where we would be renting. I didn't want to put pictures up in hopes we would not be there too long.
"Andy, I don't want to hang pictures we are not going to be there that long." I said sternly.
As I got a closer look at Andy I could see his face reddened and flush. "Nita, I just want to come to that house and have it feel like my home."
I instantly felt sick as I saw his eyes begin to well up.
"Andy, Home is Where the Heart is." I said with all sincerity.
"I understand that but I want it to feel like my home."  Not wanting me to see him in this vulnerable state he quickly left out the door for work.

We all had our moments leaving that house on Weller Ct. I came there after work on Saturday. Noone was there and all the furniture had been removed. As the garage opened I was shocked to find it empty. My stomach came up to my chest. Salty tears rolled down my cheeks as I looked at the spray painted lines across the garage floor. Alec not knowing any better when he was 9 years old took a can of black spray paint and made 3 lines across the floor. He labeled each of them very large 1, 2, 3. These lines were innocently painted as his starter points for shooting ninja stars. I remember coming home and seeing this black spray paint all over my garage floor and wanted to have someone's head. "WHO did this?" I charged into the house for answers.
Little Alec fearfully admitted it. I burst out laughing at his sweet innocence. I didn't have the heart to scold him.
I loved coming home to that spray painted floor. Now I sobbed as I looked at it for the last time. So many memories.

Andy lived in the same house all his life growing up.
I lived in over a dozen homes by the time I was 15!
The ones I remember:
  1. N.Johnson-Pontiac
  2. E. Colgate- Pontiac
  3. A couple foster homes
  4. Somewhere in Lansing in a trailer park with a woman I never really knew. She had a beautiful trailer and was very clean. I think this is where we lived when my mom got back on her feet.
  5. Some nasty apartments on E. Holly Rd and Dixie Hwy. Those got burned down by a neighbor while my mom was off the wagon and on a terrible binge.
  6. Parkway Motel in Dixie Hwy in Holly. We lived her for about 9 months.
  7. We moved into a school house on Oakhill road. We lived in the top apartment that was about 600 square feet!
  8. The bottom apartment opened up and we moved downstairs of the schoolhouse!
  9. When I was 15 my mom bought a trailer at Sashabaw Meadows trailer park in Brandon.
  10. My mom burned that down with a case of beer and a cigarette. We moved into another trailer on the same park! I moved out when I was 18.
These are the homes I remember. I remember more but they are sketchy.
Moving is just something that I am used to. I don't mind moving. Or so I thought.

Comedy of Errors!
Sometimes you just have to laugh through the tears. The closing date was given to us 5 days prior!
  1.  We had to scramble to find a UHAUL truck.  Apparently everyone was moving on the same blizzardy weekend!
  2. I got home late from work on Friday. Andy was on the cusp of a nervous breakdown when he called me from Flint. The person he thought was going to go to Flint with him and me to get the UHAUL cancelled. Andy was so upset. I was desperately trying to calm him down. "Anita, you are going to have to in meet me up here and leave your car here." He directed. I argued with him that I did not feel comfortable leaving my car in Flint. "NITA, Are you Listening to me?  We do not have a choice." I hung up the phone with him feeling helpless. I couldn't believe no one could help us just drive up to Flint and back. Out of pure desperation I called my neighbor. "Amy... Would you, Could you PLEASE PLEASE  go with me to Flint...I will buy you Starbucks! ANYTHING you want, PLEASE.." I begged.  She put on her Wonder Woman cape and saved my day. This meant so much to not just me but Andy as well. "Nita, You are going to miss me when you are gone." Amy laughed. Yes, I will miss her terribly. She was an incredible neighbor.
  3. OH...BUT it just starts to get good here!!...It was a stinking BLIZZARD going to Flint. We saw 3 cars in ditches and had not even made it 5 miles from home!
  4. Amy drove my car home and I took Andy's truck. We lived on a hill. This makes driving up my driveway VERY difficult. Amy had to park my car in HER driveway because she knew she couldn't get up. She couldn't even get up her driveway in my car!
  5. OH...And the UHAUL...It was NOT going up the driveway. Andy is a very good driver. He used to drive trucks bigger than this when he was younger working for a tent company. As he attempted to back it up and up our driveway it slipped and came all the way back down.
  6. It got caught in the crest of the driveway and the sidewalk. The UHAUL was hung up on a patch of ice and snow. After Andy attempted to rock it out he came in more frustrated to ask for my help.
  7. "Nita, I need you to get in my truck and PULL me out." He explained. I thought, "You have got to be kidding me." Andy Drives a Ford F150. It looks big but not next to this UHAUL. He then added "BUT, You have to make sure you pay attention, you only have about 8 feet to work with." OH Great.  It took about 5 minutes and sure enough I pulled him out. I felt hair growing on my chest. Without gloating too much I headed into the house.
  8. I was not in there more than 5 minutes when I saw Andy stuck AGAIN! This time the 26 foot truck was perpendicular with the road. This meant no one was able to come or go. We are right smack in the middle of the road. It was almost 9pm. I got dressed back again to help him. He was already getting the tow strap on. "OK, Now I need you to get up in the UHAUL and I am going to pull you out." Andy tells me. "WHAT?! I have to get into that THING?" I replied. This time Andy's truck was in the neighbors driveway. He had even less footage to pull me out with. If he went to far forward he would either hit their cars or go through their window. I was sick.
  9. Back and forth we laid the gas pedal down. The smell of burning rubber turned my stomach, When I let off the gas all the fumes and smoke wafted through the air. You couldn't see anything. It seemed futile. 10 minutes we worked to get the UHAUL out of the snow embankment. Finally Andy told me to go into the house. He reached for the shovel in a last ditch effort to dig his way out. I looked out the window after him a few minutes later to discover he was no longer blocking the street!
  10. Saturday I worked and Andy moved. We had a snow storm. My brother in law and his family of 8 kids all came out to help. Mom, dad and my brother in law Bruce all put their sweat and muscle into moving us. We didn't hire movers because we are going to be doing this again in the next several weeks.
  11. On Sunday when we were unpacking and finishing up at the Weller Ct house I made the mistake of mentioning my long run. Andy looked at me like I had 2 heads. Mom, well she just laughed at me. I knew better than touch that one. No run on Sunday!
  12. In the days to pass I have lost my purse a half dozen times, my keys a dozen times, my cell phone more times than I can count and my mind has yet to be found!
Home is Where the Heart is. We are settle in. I pray God gives us a house soon. I am very thankful for the house we are renting. It is over a 150 years old!  God Is Good All the Time. The last 2 weeks I have spared you with the details of stress. I have put on my game face making the best of very tough times. Emotions are sifting. There are pictures on the wall. Andy found some holes and nails.
It feels like home.

"If Home is where the heart is then may your Home be blessed . . ." 
1mile w/u
8x800m repeats 3:20 (6.40pace) .05% incline
1.25mile  c/d
Total miles 7.25


  1. Glad you're settled in for now :)
    My parents just sold the house I came home from the hospital to... they had it over 40 years. It was tough on me for them to let it go.

    1. "For Now" is the truth. It feels good to catch my breath. Kinda like running repeats. I really needed a break from all the chaos of moving. As soon as I catch my breath we are going to be up and moving again!

      The memories are something that we can take with us. But it is hard because we are so visual. I see something and it sparks another memory. I think we just do not want to ever forget those sweet memories. 40 years is a long long time. I am sure that it must have been hard for them to leave.

  2. Wow moving is so stressful! We ended up in our temporary house for 2 1/2 years!! I am so thankful I survived and we are now in the house we plan on retiring in. Just the thought of moving would put me in the nut house! Hope you feel settled soon and you move into your next place with ease! Carri~A Running bee

    1. Temporary is the word! The owners of the home have another renter coming in April so we HAVE to move again! Therefore the stress has not completely diminished! I just do not want to end up in a house that I am going to question. Having the clock tick makes me really nervous.