No running Nita! I have stuck to my guns...(Danielle you would be so proud) and went a WHOLE week of keeping my pace nothing higher than a turtles. I have still eaten everything out of the pantry and there are no leftovers in the house.
I did this challenge with a friend of mine. It is called "Give to Gain". You have to give up something for a week. I think my brain shut down after my marathon. I gave up CHOCOLATE! I should have given up running, that would have been easier considering I am in recovery! But CHOCOLATE?! Between my husbands mother bringing over lava cakes, oatmeal scotches, my son needing 6 dozen chocolate chip cookies, and Mary Pope bringing in brownies at work all in 4 days, I thought there was someone trying to sabotage me. Not to mention, I gave up CHOCOLATE during Halloween? I think I really injured my head during my marathon!
I finally went out today for my first run. I was curious to see how my body would speak to me. During the week I rolled, stretched, took the skin off my tail bone from sit-ups and then a whole lotta nothing!
I headed outside into a mild autumn morning. The air was brisk and refreshing. As I hit my START on the Garmin, my legs went ahead of my mind. It was wonderful to have my body just go on autopilot. My legs had a mind of their own. I didn't go far. I kept my miles down to about 4 today.
Let's not get to carried away.
My Running is soon transitioning over. I will be a basketball mama for the next several weeks. Both my boys play the sport. I love to watching the game. I am as obnoxious in the bleachers as I am in the trails chasing after them.
My oldest son is 15. He reminds me a lot of myself. He is very misunderstood. Even by me. Today, I had already been up to the boys schools' 5 times. I sat in the parking lot waiting for Austin to come out after cross country. He was no where. His food was getting warm sitting in the passenger seat. I brought his dinner knowing he would be starving and I had to go back to the school to take him to basketball.
I watched kids coming and going. Austin wasn't returning any of my texts. My blood was beginning to boil. This was the highest my blood pressure had been all week!
"Calm down Anita" I kept trying to talk myself off the ledge. I was about to jump into "ugly mama mode."
"Don't jump to conclusions." I tried to reason with myself. I could hear all these voices begin to argue with one another.
Then he text me. With my voice cloudy from all the chatter, I didn't even know how to respond. Back and forth we went. Austin, was actually very calm, he was acting like the adult. "WOW, this was convicting." I thought. Then, he said, "..It just got lost in translation mom....I love you."
"I LOVE YOU."
I heard the voices in my head.."He loves you when your a spaz, a hot head, a control freak, a hoover mom...He Loves YOU."
My legs might not be running. My car is always running after kids and my mind never quits running. Being a mom is so confusing. The dialogue in my mind is like constant babble. Then I have to try and make sense from senselessness. I need a translator in my mind to just understand what is being said. Then, I need a mediator to try and organize all the chaos.
It is one thing to make a mess of myself, but I have the responsibility of 2 children. I have to make good choices for not just THEM but also Myself because it affects them ultimately.
I Run so many thoughts through my head trying to do the best I can. I have to remind myself one thing when all things seem to run into a wall.
"I LOVE YOU."
Just as My son knows my imperfections, He also knows my intentions.
God Too, Loves ME. He knows my intentions, my heart, my thoughts, my hang-ups, and all the things I can't make sense of.
"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:19So Thankful that God gave Austin the words to share his Love for me. I needed that. Those words reminded me of HIS love for me. God knew all that was running through my mind, He knew EXACTLY what I needed.
Do you get confused as a parent? Do you find yourself reacting to quick?