"No Matter where you go or what you do, you do you live your ENTIRE life within the confines of your OWN HEAD." Terry Josephson
I found this quote late last night. I have thought about it over and over again in my own head!
I can let the most absurd things rent space in my head. My mind is crazy. I really do not like to enter there alone.
I think about this broken world. I think about the poor woman standing outside Krogers with dark circles over her eyes begging for food. I can see the pain deep in her eyes. I scroll through Facebook and see the sickness and prayer requests. I read the drama. The garbage people post in their OWN hurt. I hear the cries of a broken heart. Tonight I have my addiction meeting where I will hear many people share their loss. Their loss of dreams, goals, marriage and finances.
I have burdens in my own family. Burdens close to heart.
Last night Andy and I were talking before I fell asleep about a coworker he used to work with. He had to go down to the ER where he stopped and chatted with her for a minute. Andy asked her "How are you doing?" She responded "OH, you know, living the dream life!" She continued to say that she followed us on Facebook and said how we are living that life.
Together in bed Andy and I laughed.
"Stained Glass Windows." I replied to Andy smirking.
I put my clothes on like everyone else in the morning but my head is like a messy closet. My legs do not run as fast as my head. Trust me, I keep running to catch up.
I may not have the same battles as some of you but I put my Armor on just the same to fight my way through my crazy thoughts and personal struggles.
I have been invited into some big battles. I often lose.
"But I discipline my body and keep it under control...." 2Cor 9:27
I wish I could control my mind and heart the way I can my legs. It is a workout that never ends. There are circumstances where I can see results from all that hard work and then there are late sleepless nights. Nights I have beaten myself up with a double dose of crazy.
"Join the FRUIT Basket" as my sister in law Deb puts it. We are all just a little Coo Coo for CoCoa Puffs at times. We have to gain control over those things we let control US.
I Control my Mind. I Control My ACTION.
In desperation I beg God to breath air into me. To send me a line that I may climb out of the tomb I have dug.
"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."
The problem with tapering is there is a WHOLE LOT LESS running of the legs and to much running around UPSTAIRS!
My children are not going with me to ING NYC. Running the Boston Marathon this year really hurt my boys. Austin is like a M&M. Hard on the outside but soft on the inside. You wouldn't know it but he is so scared of big races now. He refused to go with us. I don't blame him. I don't know why God spared me on that awful day in Boston. I cant hear a sound of a explosion without feeling my heart go into hyper speed. I have never seen so many guns and chaos. It was more than just explosives that went off. It was Fear that exploded that day. Fear that branded my children. I HATE the poison that was left behind in my children. I will never get the images out of my mind of my boys.
I am Asking for PRAYER from you. For Safety and Peace. For Strength and Confidence. I am asking for security for my children.
I am trying to control my thoughts and rid all that poison from my mind. God has given me this opportunity and I want to Glorify HIM through it all.
NYC Marathon FUN FACT!
- The first NYC marathon was in 1970, with 127 competitors running several loops around the Park Drive of Central Park.
- Only about one-hundred spectators watched Gary Muhrcke win the race in 2:31:38.
- A total of only 55 runners crossed the finish line.
"Rather than praying for a Change in Circumstance ask God for a Change of Character."
LOOKING FOR NYC places to eat!! ANY SUGGESTIONS??? If you give me a recommendation and we go I will bring you home a souvenir and a SHOUT out!