"The Lord is my Strength and my Song; He has become my Salvation." Psalm 118:14
My morning, I was desperately trying to put one foot in front of the other. If this was any indication of how the rest of my day was going to go I should just go back to bed and start all over again I thought.
And that is EXACTLY what I did.
I didn't sleep all night and that was with me taking my melatonin. I tossed and turned, I played games on my phone, I prayed and I begged. I kicked the blankets off, then buried myself in them. It was terrible. I thought Andy was going to kick my out.
I went back to bed and dozed off for about a hour and a half. There was a day I would have felt so guilty for going back to bed. But when you cant even finish your coffee you know you have a problem.
Today is day my third day running. I thought for sure I was going to have a crappy run. I didn't know if my body would carry me or if I would be carrying my body home.
I began coaching my mind early. HILLS, lots and lots of HILLS. I told myself it was going to hurt but I was going to run them till my soles fell off.
I ran 6 miles of hills. I had picked up some "Vitatops"for mom and I at Krogers. Mom lives in a very hilly community, I decided I would just "Run" them to her house. I kept a steady pace and just ran the biggest hills over and over and over again. That awful hill by my house I ran 4 times I looked at my watch and felt great at 5 miles so I decided I would run another mile, hitting that big one by my house ONE more time.
I looked twice at my watch, "How could this be?"
The Plan: I was going to run hills at a pace that didn't break records but was just steady and no stopping.
My body wanted to go another mile but time didn't allow for that. I felt so strong and my pace was shocking.
Collision: In one day I felt my weakest and my strongest.
In my weakest position I felt so vulnerable. It was like looking into a dark room, I couldn't see what was inside, I had no idea at that point what I should be doing. I decided not to go IN. I folded my cards and accepted my weakness reminding myself that I am struggling with some health issues and I need to listen to my body.
Sometimes you have to go backwards to go forwards.
WOULD I have had such a great run had I not listened to my body and took a nap?
Its hard to say, but I am guessing NOT.
But even at my strongest point I had to think about my weakest link. My MIND.
Why cant I fight the mental demons the way I fought through the pain of hills? I struggle with the craziest thoughts finding me in places I shouldn't be camping out, let alone visiting.
Everyday I find myself able to conquering mountains, but my thoughts are my biggest disaster.
Today, I was reminded that GOD supplies my Strength and He gives Strength when I am weak. I just have to be STILL and Know that HE is God, I am nothing.
You are what you EAT:
Organic bison bites, Fresh egg (Whites) and D'Anjou pear. Organic Tart Cherry Juice
Dinner: Chicken cordon bleu, Asparagus, rice
I enjoy cooking. I love making my own sauces and roux's. Dinner was a little heavy, but I do everything in moderation.
I ate more through out the day, I am a grazer.
This year I decided I would get back into online run journaling. I have been doing really good at logging my runs into Garmin Connect. And I love it.I still keep at paper calendar.