Every Day Its You I See
You nose, your chin or even the smile that I see,
Are just a couple of the similarities between you and me.
Whether it is the good or bad or the old or new,
Everyday goes by, when I do the things you would do.
I can not deny what has been done between you and I.
All my feelings and emotions I can not lie.
Your trip so far in heaven, but you could never leave me.
For everyday in the mirror it's my mother that I see.
April 4th 93'
Today, is the 22nd year since my mother passed away. It sounds so simple put in those words. It was far from simple. It was agonizing and horrific. No 18 year old should ever have to make the choice to have their mother taken off life support.
I discovered my folder full of poems that I used to write. I have always used writing as an expression of my heart. It is my way of trying to make sense from senselessness.
So the Christmas tree is up, but I feel empty. The lights are sparking but it still feels dark. There is beauty but I feel broken.
It is just a day. Or maybe it is the month. I ran, it didn't help. I prayed, it comforted. You gotta just keep on keeping on.
Your so far away when I hold your hand,
Its not really you beside me I stand.
Dear Mother, where is it that you really lay?
Has God now taken my mother away?
Did you feel the pain that science had injected?
Or were you so far away that you were not affected?
Were those your eyes that sometimes opened when I spoke?
I asked for a miracle, I sign is what I hoped.
Can you hear the love I speak to you faithfully?
Can you feel my tears I cry to you gratefully?
Do you know I am there when I don't speak a word?
Or when I reminisce am I being heard?
Dear Mother, walk your children in the right direction,
Lead us to the roads of a mothers satisfaction.
Know that each step we take your love leads,
And all our dreams and goals must proceed.
Dear Mother, please hear us, touch us, please know we love you.
Dear Mother, forgive us, hold us, don't forget we love you.
Dear Mother, strengthen us, pick us up when we weaken,
And know that everyday its our Mothers Love that we are seeking.
I started this as my mother lay in a coma at St Joes Hospital. I finished this and read it at my mothers funeral with my sister and brother beside me.
Never Forget to Remember,