Mood Enhancer

Not everyday do I way up and say "Ya Hoo, this is going to be a great day!" Today, was a rough one. I was having difficulty sleeping throughout the night, making my 6am wake up more tiresome.
My body was aching, my mind was grumbling and I was struggling to find a happy place.

The weather was not much of a motivator for me with its gray sky and rain. Everything, including myself felt washed up and drab.
I know I am struggling when I can't even get a full cup of coffee down.

Putting one foot in front of another,  I went through my Thursday routine. No Danielle, no running and with the rain, no biking. I felt off balance.

Trying desperately to keep some momentum going, I put some music in my ears and began washing floors.

Time went by until it was time to go to Maw Maw Smiths house to clean. I was still dragging at a turtles pace.
I have been taking my thyroid medicine very routinely, however, I believe my tired day is still a result of my thyroid condition.

I had to get to the gym. I needed to go no matter how cruddy I felt. After cleaning I headed to the gym.

You have 2 ways of thinking:

1. You can cave into the feeling of being defeated and throw the towel in.
2. You can convince yourself there is NO other Option but to do what has to be done.

I chose to convince myself to SUCK IT UP and get going. As you are trying to convince yourself that "2" is the better option you have to SEE yourself doing it. You have to visualize yourself acting it through.

My Gym Workout:

• Roll and stretch-10 minutes
• Elliptical thingy-10 minutes
• Roll and stretch-5 minutes
• Balancing leg exercises-10 minutes
• A different Elliptical thingy-25 minutes 
• Abs-5 minutes
• Treadmill-1 mile-8:36
• ICE/Cold Plunge-15 minutes

MOOD Enhancer: Obviously it would be great to be able to run. There is NO other exercise that comes close to running for me. So I flirt around on these other machines in hopes that I will get a good sweat on. I am thirsty for sweat, I am eager to be out of breath and I am chasing that burn that says "you have arrived at your Happy Place".
The more sweat accumulated, the more I was feeling my frown turning upside down. It was like the sweat was carrying my bad attitude, my exhaustion, my sadness and all the other funk I was riddled with.
Today, was a reminder the importance of releasing Serotonin. Many people are depressed and have days strung together with sadness. Seratonin is a chemical that is released with exercise. This chemical when released helps enhance your mood. (click the link to read more)

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Yesterdays 11 mile bike ride.

BACKTRACK: Yesterday, I saw Clint V for physical Therapy. Holy knotty ITBand. His assistant tried to massage them out only in the process finding more. She then game me a treatment, it is like shock therapy. It uses sound waves to try to break up the knots.
I told Clint I will grit it out, I just wanted to RUN. It wasn't long after that he was taking his elbow and raking it down my ITBand, like a meat tenderizer. I have some beautiful bruises to show the seriousness of me just wanting to run from that treatment.
I got out my favorite running bible: The Runners World BIG Book of Marathon and Half Marathon TRAINING to read up Again on ITBand Friction. There was actually blurb that Clint Verran shares on this!

For right now I am not able to run at the speed or the distance that I would like. I try to Focus on my Abilities rather than my Limitations. This really helps me stay positive and gives me not only hope but also gratitude in my brokenness.

Looks Innocent enough...Until I saw a branch  a couple feet away stick

its TONGUE out at me! It was a big old black snake. I can not imagine IT was more afraid than I was!

 

 

Anyone out there struggling with ITBand issues?? I would love to hear some encouragement!

 

Anita

40, Flabby and Falling Apart!

 Proverbs 4:25-27

 "Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.  Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil. " 

 

 

This morning I was anxious to see if Austin was going to join me for my bike ride. Yesterday evening, he said that he would probably go with me. As a mom what I heard was "Yeah mom, that sounds like fun, we can bond and enjoy some special time together!"

But what he probably meant was " Ugh, OK mom, yeah, yeah, wake me up in the morning and I will see how tired I am and how nagging you are when you wake me up."

I am not sure how our paths connected but without nagging and without him being a grumpy butt, he simple replied "Yeah mom, give me 5 minutes."

 

I was so excited, I was skipping steps downstairs to finish getting ready.

 

I had a 10 mile loop planned. It is my kind of planning though. My 10 mile loop really defines as a 14 mile loop. If I really said my loop was as long as I was planning Austin would have crawled back into bed.

We took a lot of back roads to get to the park.

I was ahead of Austin by about 500 feet when we entered Quick Rd. Austin was struggling with his water bottle. I was looking up a 1/4 mile incline with a lot of loose gravel. As I glanced back to check on Austin I noticed a white car pull onto the road. I instantly got nervous because Austin was in the middle of the road. Austin is almost 15. He is a head taller than me. I knew that he could see the car along with  get out of the path of the vehicle. In my concern,  I looked back at him again. This time my front wheel caught the sand, twisting my bike abruptly and with one swift move, down I went.  Due to the incline of the road I couldn't touch the ground to save myself. I landed in the soft gravel/sand mix. I couldn't get up fast due to the bike tangled on top of me.

 

"Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.  Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil. "

 

What a picture of life for me this week. I needed this reminder. As soon as I looked back, my path turned into slipping sand. I knew Austin was going to be good. But I was caught up on fear and not focused. 

 

Sometimes we let our peripheral vision become our main vision. We are looking more out of the corners of our eyes than we are looking forward.  

We Major on the Minors and Minor on the Majors. 

We go along in our day "happy happy happy" until we turn on Facebook seeing something that trips us up. Or we get caught up in gossip, taking that phone call we knew better. Maybe we are not even looking sideways, maybe we are looking backwards and living with resentments and jealousy. Some of us hold unto so much unforgiveness we can hardly pedal forward at all.

A Face a mother could love!

 

I have not healed up from my last fall on my bike, when I have scraped myself up yet again. This is exactly what happens when we are not staying focused.  It is very difficult to recover when we fall. The thing I noticed most about my falls is that I am the one hurt the most. I am the one left damaged.

When I take my focus off the path God has for me, I hurt mostly myself. My wounds are noticeable to others, regardless of how I try to conceal them. They always show no matter how we try to hide them.

 

The BikeDown:

14 miles with Austin.

My knee was sore from yesterdays run. After we biked, I drove up to Genesys and iced my knee for 18 minutes. 

I got a massage today. I asked "Holly" if she could focus on my IT Band. 

Funny thing, "Holly"  my massage therapist was talking about my injury. I was telling her how I have to strengthen my glutes ect. She said "Yeah, your glutes are a bit FLABBY!"

Oh my gosh!!  Seriously?? FLABBY?? There goes her TIP!

Just kidding. I tipped her, A verbal tip!

Just kidding again. She was actually great. My buns of steal days are long gone! Reality check!

40, flabby and falling apart!

 

Anita

 



2 Weeks from Running, Feigning!

Hanging Behind ANDY

"The ONLY one that can tell you 'you CAN'T'  is you and YOU DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN"
 NIKE

I have not ran in 13 days. NOT that I have not tried, I just have not gotten farther than a couple hundred feet. My knee instantly feels heavy with a aching pain located around the knee.

Diagnosis: ITB Friction: Iliotibial band syndrome causes pain on the outside of the knee which is caused by friction of the iliotibial band on the side of the knee. It is also known as ITB syndrome or ITBFS and sometimes referred to as runners knee.  Def. from Sports Med injury.

I am sure running my 50 miler, NYC Marathon, Detroit Free Press half and then Boston in April without any significant time off was not real brilliant. It was fun for what it is worth. And has been worth ALOT.A appointment with a surgeon, a MRI, a X-ray and now Physical Therapy with Clint Verran.

I am so thankful for Andy. He has been very sympathetic, understanding and generous about letting me pursue all the means to get back out there and run. He reads my posts and genuinely feels terrible that I can not run. He even does my exercises with me too hold me accountable and support me. (probably scared to death it might happen to him as well!)

Funny how sometimes you just KNOW. You have that affirmation deep in your gut.
Today, I woke up and JUST knew. I knew today was a RUN DAY. I needed the run like a addict feigning for their next fix. I was desperate to run. Every cell within my body was thirsty for its drug of choice. All my thoughts circulated around running. I was itiching, planning, checking the weather, planning my route, my fuel and my prayers.

Come Hell or High Water I WAS RUNNING.

Smiling a Mile 4!!

And that is exactly what I did!!! I RAN. I RAN!!
7 MILES.  I ran 7 miles of Andys LONG RUN. Then I got on my bike and road another 7 miles to support him.
I couldn't complain about anything, not the black flies, the heat or the humidity. I was RUNNING.

I wasn't running fast.
I wasn't running hard, 5:1 intervals
I wasn't running pain free.
But I WAS RUNNING.

I feel so triumphant with my little 7 miler. Grateful to GOD. My heart is FULL.

ANITA!

Dealing with Disappointment

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28

 

DISAPPOINTMENT: This is LIFE. Unmet Expectations. Broken Promises. Unfortunate Circumstances. Heartbreak, hang-ups, and hardships. This is LIFE.


There is a reason for EVERYTHING. You may not know what it is and you may not even believe there is a reason for everything. But there IS. I have discovered that for me to get through the challenges of LIFE and believe that GOD has a Purpose for EVERYTHING I have to get over Myself.

There is a reason for everything, I just have to look deeper within myself to decipher Gods message for me to be who He wants me to be.

I am very challenged in this season of my life. Raising a 14, almost 15 year old presents constant obstacles.
Not owning my own home is disappointing.
Not being able to fix my body is terribly disappointing.
Today was a perfect day for a RUN...disappointed yet again.
These are the easy disappointments. Many disappointments have taken years to get over, while others I am still working on to this day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wanting to run burned hot within me today. Trying not to let it rent to much space in my head, I quickly headed out the door for my bike ride.
Stay Positive. "Hey, At least you can ride a bike!"
I heard Andy whispering in my ear from the night before, "Can you even get your heart rate up riding a bike?"
Stay Positive. "Come on Anita, peddle hard up the hill." I could feel my quads on fire, refusing to stop I tried to go harder.
Every time I felt a little grief I looked around. I could see more beauty on a bike than I could on foot. Twice as much more in the same time.
I see the problem and try to think of something positive to trump the negative.
I even found myself laughing in my disappointments today. My nose runs more than I do these days on my bike. The snot was clear but annoying. I was barely keeping it at bay. I knew it was time to blow it. Keeping my one hand on the handle bars, I used my other hand to pinch my nose and BLOW. With my head to the side I let it rip, none of it landed any other place except my shoulder. NASTY. Trying not to loose my balance, I was laughing at myself and all the nose juice on my shoulder.
Very far from ladylike. However, it did make me smile.

Here are a few other things that made me smile. Smiling and staying positive really helps me with disappointment. Knowing that God is using everything for Good gives me a little more peace.

I was glad I was there to take these 2 hens picture. A car came up behind me very fast. They would have hit the hens. The driver saw me as they rounded the corner before the hens. I motioned for them to slow down as I pointed to the hens. There are not speed limits on back roads anymore, you have to be very careful.

Took this picture on the trail head..But I was too big of a scaredy cat to go any farther into the woods alone!

The Damn at Seven Lakes. As I was taking the pic I saw something out of the corner of my eye. When I looked down it was a dog! She came over to sniff me.

RUNDOWN:

Bike: 16 miles

ABS..Oh gosh it HURTS! 100 sec Plank, 170 crunches, 140 sit-ups, 60 leg raises

ITB exercise- More pain, but I can tell I am getting stronger. So sore.

"Be calm and strong and patient. Meet failure and disappointment with courage. Rise superior to the trials of life, and never give in to hopelessness or despair. In danger, in adversity, cling to your principles and ideals. Aequanimitas!"
Sir William Osler  

 

Anita

 

 



Keep It Simple

Let's see if I can knock the day out in 10 sentences or less!

SELFIE on todays Bike ride!

1. Early morning bike ride: 10 miles of awesomeness.
2. Went to stay with Andy's Maw Maw for her at Home Physical Therapy.
3. Had my first session with Clint Verran for Physical Therapy
4. Clint said that he would totally agree with Dr. Samani on his diagnosis.
5. Clint was encouraging, he said I WOULD be able to run the DETROIT MARATHON that I registered for weeks ago! Ya Hoo Bubaloo!
6. Closed out my night watching Austin play 2 games of basketball at The Cage, where they crushed both teams.
7. Mom and Dad came out also to watch Austin play. Very thankful for their support.

 If you set a goal for yourself
and are able to achieve it,
you have won your race.
Your goal can be to come in first,
to improve your performance,
or just finish the race it's up to you.
-Dave Scott



My Goal is to Heal up with Patience and Run Again with Endurance.

Whats Your Goal?

Anita

"What does the FOX say?"

I went out early in the morning for my bike ride. I headed to the park, curious about what wildlife I would be seeing.
Pedaling as fast as my legs would take me through downtown, I saw a runner ahead of me. I live in a small town. As I looked at her from the back, I tried to recognize her. The closer I got, the more I confirmed my suspicion, it was Courtney. Courtney is a local runner I have ran with a couple times. She is spunky and full of energy. Together we both ended up catching the light at the inner section. I road my bike next her when the light allowed us to go. We chatted about 1/4 of a mile until she turned into her sub division. Living in a small town you always run (or Bike) into some one you know, I think this is one of the perks of a small community.

I headed to the park. As I entered the park I was swept off my feet by the intense beauty. I know it looked the same the day before, however, it always feels like the first time when I enter into the park.
It is just breath taking to me. The passage in the park is lush. It is more than just the forest surrounding you, it is the smells of grass, it is the breeze and the warm air against your skin. The lakes are glowing with the sun reflecting its rays. I saw a beaver dancing in the water. It was so quiet and peaceful. This was God to me. I rode my bike to the edge of the water. Filled with emotion, I could feel the tears of gratitude drip down my cheeks. If God could create such Beauty, Oh what else he can do. I was boldly reminded of His Power and my weakness. I stood by the edge of the water in prayer. Gratitude.

I headed back. I took my bike down a side road in the park that I had never taken before. I am a bit of a scaredy cat. A couple cars passed me. I always wonder "What IF.." Another lake stopped the road from going any farther. It was so pretty. I discovered a small path. I got a little creeped out by my lonesome curiosity. I booked it out of there!
In order to get back out I had to go up a steep hill that stretched about 1/4 of a mile. I was huffing it up the hill. My quads were burning with the company of my lungs. Just as I able to catch my breath I was startled by a animal that darted out in front of me. It was a FOX! I had a cheesy grin on my face all the way out of the park.

My family makes fun of me a lot. I am sure I have given them ammunition over the years but they are relentless.
Later that day,  I told Andy I saw a fox in the park. He of course said , "Are you sure it was a fox? I don't know about that one Nita." I looked at Andy like "Seriously? Like I don't know a FOX?!" I mean I was in the woods, it wasn't like I was telling him I saw a stinking grizzly bear or moose. To add a little more fun Andy thought he would be funny and said, "So, What did the Fox say?"
OH JEESH..And he makes fun of me?!

Rundown:
Bike: 15.15 miles
Cold Plunge: 17 minutes
Ab Challenge: 100 sit-ups, 150 crunches, 58 leg lifts, 90sec plank
ITB exercises.

DR. SAMANI'S OFFICE CALLED TODAY!
They were only going to call if they saw something on the MRI disc. I was a mess listening to my message that I had missed.
It was a confirmation to Dr. Samani's original diagnosis! I felt so relieved. Thank YOU JESUS!


Thank YOU for all the messages and words of encouragement.
Anita

Coping without Running.

James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

 

It is hard for me to count it all joy every time I see another runner cross the street in front of me.

Today, Andy was running 12 miles. I was green with envy. I would never show my jealousy to Andy but then after 18 years of marriage I am sure he could tell.

It's not the malicious jealousy, the Tonya Harding kind. I wouldn't trip a runner or anything like that. It is more like the "That looks like so much fun." Kinda jealousy.

 

My niece Sarah and her boyfriend stopped over for a couple hours.

 

After they left I hopped on my new friend, my Schwinn to look for Andy.

 

I thought of Amy, my client while I went looking for him. She softly reminded me that it is good to be on the sidelines some times. Sometimes it is just as important to be a cheerleader. Andy needed me to be his cheerleader.

It didn't take me long to locate that lengthy body coming at me from downtown. Andy had 3 miles to go.

Andy was exhausted. He was soaked in sweat, out of breath and beginning to fall apart. "Come on Andy, pull you back up and run with your core." I spoke to him from behind on my bike. I was shocked to see him do as I said.

For the next 3 miles I encouraged him. "That's it Andy, Strong as an Ox." 

I wanted to share in the personal torture he was putting himself through. The weakened state of running on empty looked like absolute fun. The numbness in your fingertips, the cotton mouth from a hot summer day mixed with mental voices challenging you to go a little bit farther had me almost in tears with lust.

 Rather turn myself into the green eyed monster I continued trying to motivate Andy, "That's it Andy, Shake it OUT, Deep Breath, finish STRONG."

I was encouraged by Andy as I watched him follow my words. He would drop his arms down, shaking them out, inhale deeply and straighten back out.

 

ADVENTURES in Biking:

We have been looking for a house for over 6 months now. We want to stay close to the area we live in. If a house comes on the market I like to ride my bike to it. It seems more incognito. A new house came on the market this evening. I decided I would get a few more miles and check out the house.

I find myself giggling like a school kid as I get on my bike. Here I am a 40 year old woman all excited to ride my bike like a 14 year old. I love the warm summer air blowing against my skin as I jump the curbs. I pedal real fast and then lift my toosh and coast over cracks on the sidewalks.

As I came up to the railroad tracks I saw a police car coming to a stop in front of me. He caught my eyes and knew HE was BUSTED! I had a big ole grin on my face, laughing I  yelled "Ha ha, You are BUSTED!" He rolled down his window and confirmed his guiltiness. "YES, You caught me!" He laughed as he continued to put his SEAT BELT on!

I only road my bike 5 miles this evening. On the way home I could see this big beefy red truck coming up along side of me. This guy has his windows down and in a red neck voice barks out the window "Nice, is that a Huffy!" I couldn't help but laugh. I probably looked like a little kid toying through the neighborhood on my bike. The sun was coming down, my pony tail was bobbing and I was swaying back and forth as fast as I could on my bike.

 

It all comes down to a good attitude for me. This seems to be one of the only things I can control. Some days are easier than others when trying to cope with the disappointment of not running. I am trying to give it to God and trust Him over everything. Life is unfair and there is not always a explanation for things. Questioning God is normal. I struggle with not being able to control by body. I struggle with not knowing what I can and can not do. These are reminders to rely on God not Myself. To exercise my Faith in Him and Not myself.

 

Anita