Such an "Anita" move. Having cancer last summer left me pretty white due to the fact that I couldn't be in the sun. Today, I embrace every minute I can to be outside however, I will be thinking differently this evening I am sure.
If you have ran with me or even hiked with me you will know that I LOVE trees. Old, broken, wild looking trees. This week, I was running at Holly rec at a trail less traveled and came across this beauty. I stood dwarfed at its base and in awe of its grandeur.
As the branches all grew in different directons, I thought of how I could relate to this.
This Branches of Communication is a follow-up from a few days ago.
Communication has to come from within you, you are the Trunk. And if you are not rooted properly your branches can really be a mess. Bad communication can be fierce and uncultivated or it can be bare and lifeless.
Honesty is the best policy.
1. Honesty helps build a bridge to trust.
Giving honest answers and opinions when asked. Sometimes we think that we need to tell people our honest but most of the time it is only serving us and can hurt more than it helps.
Yes, it is important to be honest when you are communicating but sometimes your delivery is the problem.
I am very passionate and tend to communicate my passion with emotion, this honesty can hurt my relationships if I let my emotions control me. I have a lot of personal experience here.
Being in Quarantine has a lot of us very emotional. I have to really take a step.
Snap Judgements smother discussion.
James 1:19 "....Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.."
1. Listen ALL the way through.
2. Stop judging (different isn't always wrong).
3. Snap Judgements intimidate and bully one another.
4. By passing judgements on one another's attempts to communicate we create a totem pole with us on top. This equivalates to a lack of equality in the relationship and real communication becomes impossible.
Language of the limbs.
Body language often expresses what the other person is really thinking or feeling better than words.
Anger Breeds Anger.
1. Any angry person is not a communicating person
2. We can be assertive and stand up for ourselves without being abrasive or aggressive.
I grew up in a very hostile home. Addiction is like that. That Irish/Mexican blood runs hot! Anger was a very common emotion. I am very comfortable in a pool of Anger. It is not a good place for me and it is a place that takes intentional effort to remain calm. I hate myself when I give Anger control over me. I can see so much destruction in just moments.
Controlling Communication.
1. We do not have to be controlled by what other people say.
I always so "You do not have to go to every argument you are invited to!
2. HOWEVER, we do not have to try and control other people with our words and body language. OUCH!
This quarantined life has brought communication to a whole new place for many of us. From Facetime calls to Zoom meetings I have personally communicated on different levels than I had in the past.
My branches have always been a little dense. Not because I am Chatty Kathy, rather because I enjoy contact and connection with people. (and not because I am NOT chatty Kathy)!
I still have some branches that are a tangled mess of imperfection, I am a work in progress.
I really do embrace communication and the opportunity to share, receive and learn even when it can be sometimes painful.
These are my thoughts, I am no scholar, a Hairstylist by trade. Over 20 years behind the chair, I have learned a few things on communication.
Here are the other tips I have learned in this Quarantined Life.
I have been trying to write a little more, it has been very therapeutic for ME. I will post them but I do not leave them up long. My goofy Anita garble.
RUNDOWN:
I am 8 months POST chemo! My body is still in recovery mode.
My feet are still a hot mess. I wish someone else recovering from cancer could tell me if this is normal. Neuropathy is no joke.
My knee is still slowly healing. I am sure it would come along faster if I just didn't run. But truth be told when I do not run my knees hurt just as bad, so I RUN.
A little slower, a little more cautious and a little more intentional.
May 4-10= 45miles of running AND walking.
11th-17th= 60 miles of running AND walking.
This week I have 30 miles so far.
HEAD GOAT VIRTUAL RACE: I signed up for this for the month of May. It is my FIRST Run streak challenge. Several of my friends signed up. Angie W, Melissa T, Melissa S, Elizabeth J, Rachel D, Cristina, Brad B, Pam C, and Steve H, and so many more.
It has been so much fun. I have never been a fan of virtual races but Randy has put so much work into making this run fun, encouraging and motivating.
All you have to do is WALK or RUN everyday for 31 days.
It has been so successful that he is doing it for June.
AND...ITS FREE! you give what you can! I think it is very important to support these local businesses.
Check out this out Michigan Stay-Cay Your Way, Link here
Need motivation, Sign UP and Run with me virtually!
I just want to give a shout out to a couple of my readers, Maybe the only 2 of my readers!
Connie, my neighbor from my old house. I have not lived in that neighborhood in almost 7 years and she loved and supported me through my cancer last year even in her own sickness.
Patty. She is a client of mine. I just love when we chat that she reads my goofy words. I would see her ever 4 weeks and I would love that she would be so in tune with me through my blog.
In Closing, How are your branches? I know that writing these post have really help me do a lot of self inventory. Just because I write this does not mean I have perfected it, I am working on it. I have failed on many of it but I keep trying.
Anita~
The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause. Mark Twain
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