Renew

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” —J. Pierpont Morgan

Today was a perfect day to listen to a motivational speaker. Michael Cole gave our salon a private class. I always enjoy getting a little shot of inspiration, motivation and coaching.
As the morning turned to afternoon all the windows in our meeting room glowed with sunshine.
I felt myself getting distracted by the blue skies.
RUN. I wanted to try to run.

We wrapped up our session with enough inspiration to feel fulfilled.
It also left me stimulated in other ways.
Not only did I feel professionally renewed, my mind and body felt revived.
It was a good day to test out the legs.

" I will strengthen the weary and renew those who are weak. "  Jeremiah 31: 25

I am deep. I overthink, reflect and am always my worse critic. I just don't want to be the same person I was yesterday. I don't want to stay the same. I want to grow and this has been a painful process as I have been pruned, deeply cut back. To the point that my regrowth is going to take time and a lot of patience.

The Oxford dictionary defines renewal as "..the replacing or repeat of something that is worn out, run-down or broken."

OH DO I FEEL BROKEN. My body feels shattered, 20 weeks of chemo has left me confused in my own skin.
Like a ragdoll, my smile is sill there but my form is run down these days.
Oh but that sunshine, the insight and vision made me feel RENEWED.

I asked a couple people to pray for me to be able to run. I giggled inside as they just stared at me like a crazy person. I thought, no one is going to pray for you to RUN Anita, this was not a first world problem, there are poor starving children in Africa that need more prayer than you running a few miles in the woods.

RUNDOWN: 

The sun was beaming as the temperatures rose to over 40 degrees.
With my Diadora running shoes on and winter GOODR's protecting my eyes I gleefully drove into Holly Rec.
This run was either going to go really well or painfully wrong. I wouldn't know until I tried. Being Afraid and Without Action was not an option.
I likes window number 2, Afraid and Curious.
Worst case scenario, I walk it back, its a 6 mile loop.

"Easy does it killer" I told myself as my shoes sunk into the snow. I couldn't stop smiling. One mile turned into two and soon enough I realized there was no turning back. My knee wasn't perfect but it was feeling renewed, strengthened. My spirit too was being uplifted as my fear faded away.
I thanked God,  finding gratitude in everything from the brilliant white snow, the glorious sky and each step my feet landed upright.
I got excited to feel sweat trickle down my back and even laughed out loud as I slipped, my phone flailing in the snow. I wanted to run into Gods arms "Thank YOU, thank you I love this gift you have given me daddy. "

I did the whole loop. I ran everything but 2 hills, one because I slipped and peed my pants!

COLLISION:
RENEW, the replacing of something that is worn out...
Some days we feel worn out. When our bodies fail us it alters our spirit. But God gives us strength asking us to take time to recover. To rest and be patient. It is in this time, in silence that we might not hear Gods audible voice but we will HEAR his wisdom in our hearts.
I am not healed, I may never be fully healed, but everyday He is renewing me. In HIS time, In HIS way.
Today was a great day of renewal. I was recharged professionally listening to Michael Cole. He shared some rich nuggets of information. Both deep and brilliant.
I am thankful for this.
I am also very thankful for God renewing my mind, body and spirit.

Anita~