Moving Forward

I like to use the term "getting stuck on stupid". A very blunt way of saying that you are moving no where fast. Sometimes we think we are moving forward but in reality we are just moving.

Moving Forward: Booby Healing
Today I saw my breast surgeon. We discussed fat grafting in August. It is kind of a weird way of saying liposuction. They will take fat and relocate it around my implants to soften the ripples.
* You do NOT grow more fat if you gain weight. At adulthood you quit growing fat cells, however they increase and decrease in volume not quantity when you gain or lose weight.
He will have to take it from several locations. Some of the fat cells will not live, they are very fragile but most of the relocated cells will live in their new location.

Moving Forward: Physical Therapy
I just finished my third week of physical therapy for my knee. I think we are healing, just not nearly as fast as I would like. I still have pain but not constant. Sadly. I know a lot of the healing is slow due to my body still recovering from all that chemo. They say it takes up to a year to START feeling normal again. My physical therapists are great. I LOVE Clint Verrans office. They take time to work on your total well being. I had a knot in my calf this week and they worked and worked it out. They have been wanting me to run....

Moving Forward: North Oaks Brewery 5k. 

Claudia and I both won new Glasses!

GFAC (Greater Flint Athletic Club) directed a 5k pub and taco run put on by Erin O'Mara.
I don't drink but I do love tacos!
It is so fun to "Mix it up".  I stepped out of my box running with another group last night. I saw so many runners I know. Everyone was very kind. Erin was a big support to me at my fundraiser in October. I joined her running group so I could get close enough to her to say "Thank you..." While it was nice to run with all the runners and even to be able to run it was awesome too, however,  to see her meant the most. To give her my humblest thanks for barely knowing me and supporting me meant so much.
It was a beautiful night for a run, I just wish my knee would have felt better but I did get through 3.1 miles. And I won a pair of SHAMROCK GOODR's.

Moving Forward: Circles

Laughing and crying at the same time!

As I begin to heal I am reminded to keep moving forward. I didn't run today but I did go to the gym.
I did a strength workout for 20 minutes on the elliptigo, 10 minutes on the row machine and 16 minutes on the bike. It wasn't Rockstar-ish but it was my best.
Sometimes I feel like I am going in circles because I do not see results.
I am trying new things and doing the things I hate (BIKING). I biked in honor of JEFF. I could hear him in my ear calling me a "Candya$$".  I kept peddling even when the sweat burned my eyes. Andy came over to check on me as I whined more. Unsympathetic he told me to do sprints. "SPRINTS! what is that, that sounds awful, do I not look miserable enough?" I cried. Andy just laughed at me with his stupid watch timing me. "GOO GO, Faster Faster..." he barked.
It was pure misery. I cried and Andy laughed.
I am trying. I feel like a foreigner in my own body. If you have had cancer you will understand what I mean. My body just doesn't feel like mine. The physical effects the mental. My mind is a battlefield. Even though I know I am not running in circles I am learning to have faith and trust God in the process. Sometimes we do not see the work we put in, sometimes it takes time and sometimes we never see the results we want that does not mean we quit.

Moving Forward: Evolving  
I want to keep changing, growing and moving forward.
HABITS. I don't want my habits to be all about ME. I want to make a HABIT of giving back.
My body is not the only thing that fails me, my heart does too. I am trying to grow and rebuild in many ways.
I am NOT the same person I was last year. I am still trying to figure out who I am. I know who I want to be. And like training for a race I have a lot of work to do. I am excited for 2020 and all the opportunities to give back I have.
One of my mantras is "It is not about you Anita."  Learning to evolve by giving. That is the goal.

"It is through giving that you receive more than you have." 

Anita~