Blue is Better

Glass City Marathon. Two weeks out.
I'm 44 years old. 45 this December.

This is no regular marathon for me. This is my SECOND run at Glass City trying to qualify AGAIN for Boston.
Last year I missed it by almost 3 minutes. I bonked at mile 21. The sun baked me. I walked when I should have been running. My eyes were dry of the tears that wanted to flood them. I knew it was not going to happen. My legs were like lead weights. I felt like I was running in muck, going no where fast or slow.
I remember the sky being SOOO BLUE. It was the most beautiful day. The Perfect day to qualify for Boston.
The perfect day for my running partner, Lacey, but not me.

For the last 14 weeks, I have silently been suffering. Running more intentionally than I enjoy. I have been beating my body up on pavement and suffering in freezing cold temps. I have been in emotional agony over long runs and a big whiny mess. The demons haunt me.
Failure has a target on me.

Last week a client of mine came in. "Anita, how is your running going?" Sometimes I am just amazed that people still ask. Running is of course next to my family and my Faith my next greatest passion.
"Steve" always asks questions about my running. My heart melts with just those few words.

BLUE IS BETTER. 
"Blue is better. What would life be without Blue..."
For weeks I have felt "BLUE". Nervous, anxious, discouraged. Those closest to me know this. If you have been reading my blogs without falling asleep, you too know that I have been emotionally stressed over qualifying for Boston.

Today Lacey and I headed over to Paula and Matts house. The Sky was Blue. My new running shoes were Blue, my running pants were Blue, my running shirt was even BLUE.
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT WAS NOT BLUE?
My Spirit. 

I was running next to this girl who worked her BUTT off and was going to BOSTON. I am so proud of her.
Her Dream was MY DREAM.
Her SMILE was MY Smile.

And...She is my number one fan.

"Friendship improves happiness and abates misery by doubling our JOY and dividing our Grief." Joseph Addison

This past week, I ran a lot solo. It was tough to do. I love running with my squad. I opened Instagram and my news feed was flooded with pictures of them all running together, Facebook more pictures and even a group text thread we are all in with even MORE pictures and videos. Smiles, laughter, goofiness. And I ran alone, suffering, sweating beating myself up with no running partner but the demons that haunt me all week.
I would find encouragement from those little words of a few that have been checking in on me.
My client Steve, just simply asks "Anita, how is your running going?"
Or Lacey "ANITA! YOU GOT THIS!"
Or my family miles away texting me encouragement.
The encouragement from just a few goes far to keep you going as you are suffering solo.

With my dreamer next to me, the four of us took off in the blue sky. BLUE IS BETTER. Each person next to me, Paula, Lacey and Matt, have done EPIC things. The four of us have all encouraged each others dreams and goals. Always cheering for each other and supporting one another. I was so happy to have them along side of me.

RUNDOWN:
Distance: 14 miles
Where: Polly Ann Trail
Pace: 9:18

Boston Qualifying time for me: 3h55min
That means I basically need a 3:50 to guarantee me a spot.

"Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. 

Failure is delay,not defeat.

It is a temporary detour, not a dead end." Denis Waitley

"Anita, I want to run Boston one time together, you and me, holding hands across that finish line." Laceys Dream. My dream.
Boston, One more time. 

We are tapering now. It is what it is. I would love some prayers if you remember a little runnergirl with a dream...

Anita