August, my Miles, my Smiles and my Heartaches.

"The only way to define your limits is to go beyond them." Arthur Clarke

My favorite Tree at Holdridge. It breathtaking. Its enormous, strong yet weak. Alive but dead...Its fabulous. Deep, full of stories, years of thriving and years of dying.

The count down appears to be going fast. My nerves are beginning to get antsy. I have fears. I have concerns. I have disappointments. I question myself and my abilities to run 100 miles in October. In order to calm myself down I try to focus on special training runs designed specifically for my 100 miles. I break my training up the way I break up a long run.
Next up....Woodstock 50 miler.
I have a 50k night run on the 16th of September.
Then the Taper.

August was a good month.
1 50K training run
1 night run
2 races, the Crim and the Great Pizza Challenge.
Multiple back to back long runs.
Monthly Miles: 295.1

My lil cabin in the woods

This past week was a little challenging for keeping my miles up. I rented a cabin at Holly Rec. Matt and Paula camped and even stayed one night with me.
Claudia, Melissa, Rachel and Lacey also came out to play, kayaking, bomb fires and running with me.

I gave my kayak to Laceys kiddos.

It was a nice getaway. Full of adventure. The quietness of the woods was the perfect canvas for deep thoughts, peaceful mornings and laughter with friends.

Over the last two days I managed to get my back to back long runs in.

How we all "shoed" up to run!!

Yesterday, after cleaning the cabin I headed home. Between practices and life I had a small window to get my run on. It was in the highest of heat. It was wonderful.
The warm sun felt like I was being hugged for 16.5 miles. And I really needed that hug. My legs were moving faster than they should have been. After 5 miles, I decided to add walk breaks at the top of every mile to slow my pace down. My heart was skipping beats, my palms were in fists and I was trying to hold back emotional girly tears. I would look at my pace, 8:40....! SLOW down ANITA, breath, relax.
Its like a broken record in my head. . I replay scenes, conversations, scenarios from yesterdays to yesteryears. Then I find myself transferring emotions of victory into defeat and discouragement. I cant stop, I regurgitate it until I make myself sick.
It took 14 miles  to detach from the chatter that was screaming at me. It didn't shut down, I was just able to turn down the volume.

 "Run into Peace." Meister Eckhart

Rachel, Claudia and I : JOY

Thank GOD for new days, fresh eyes and good friends.
Today was my back to back long run. Yesterday roads, today trails. 20 miles at Holdridge.
I met Claudia and Rachel for my first 4 miles in the West loop. They were such a breath of fresh air. I needed their smiles, their words, their hugs.
The last 16, Grubers Grinder Solo. My head was dilated with joy. A new spirit. I was determined to move forward. Stay in a good place. Not dance with the devil that wanted to sabotage my run and me in general.
I sole focus was going to be on running. My running form, my running pace. Breathing, eating, drinking.
It was a great plan but I kept tripping. The rain has really washed the trails out. Roots and rocks covered the trail. This was actually good training. It reminded me to pick up my feet. To run upright. To be aware of the trail, keeping my eyes out about 8 feet at all times. As I came down the hills, I relaxed my body, trying not to put on the breaks but run free and strong. Fear will scare you into a stumble if your not careful. When you run scared you tighten your muscles, relax and control your muscles. Don't let them control you. I ran a lot of the hills. I slowed down, pumped my midget arms and got on my toes picking my knees up. If you keep your posture up, you keep your chest cavity open, this allows you to get better oxygen and be more effective.
Trust me, I was STILL out of breath and literally counting till my heart rate came back down.
AND I still tripped a half dozen times. Once I tripped so low I swear my chin scraped the trail. I had my hands out ready save my face but I never fell, I just started laughing and talking out loud, "OH, OH, OHHH YEAH, BABY! I'm UP , Yeah buddy, BAM! How do you LIKE THAT! I'M STILL UP!"
The trails were so quiet. I was all alone for 16 miles. Bike tracks and deer prints is all I had to follow. Occasionally, I would see the trees rustle from my peripheral vision.  I jumped about 10 feet in the air when I startled a squirrel, we both actually jumped about 10 feet in the air!
But I didn't see any bugs, very few spider webs and no snakes!
I ran the trails steady, slower, more intentional.

Rundown:

Distance: 20miles

Time: 3:45

Nutrition: Honey Stingers and a half a banana

Shoes: Hokas Cliftons: I bought these at the Crim Expo. I wore them both yesterday and today. NO Blisters. They are a great transition shoe for both trails and backroads.

THE COUNTDOWN:

Woodstock 50m: Saturday, September 9th.

Hennipin 100: Saturday October 7th.

"PLAY not only keeps us young but also maintains out perspective about the relative seriousness of things. Running is play, for even if we try hard to do well at it, it is a relief from everyday cares."  Jim Fox