Preparing for Grand Canyon pt 1

 "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jer. 33:3

It has always been a dream of mine to see the Grand Canyon, one of the 7 wonders of the world. Truth is, I have never traveled to Arizona. Having a family we always went on vacations but never did a lot of flying due to the expense. 

The kids are older and cooler and don't want to hang out with mom and dad, so now mom and dad are having fun hanging out with each other. 

Andys high school buddies did a guy's trip last year and I sat home green with envy. 

But this June, we are going! I am going to try to share the details leading up to us going as well as our trip. All kinds of silly details starting with....

I quit eating out at lunch to save extra money. It's the little things. And the little things add up! 

Costs so far for Grand Canyon:

• 2 nonstop flights to Phoenix Arizona: $1200 (Thats why I have been packing a lunch!)
• Grand Canyon Permits: $58
• Womans Osprey backpack 70L: $272 ( Used our coupon, saved $65!)
• Andy insulated air mattress: $79 (on sale, 1/2 off) 
• Anita insulated air mattress: $80 (used coupon saved $30)
• REI Co-op half dome 2+ tent with footprint: $165 (Half off for REI members!)

Yeah, it is adding UP! We have a few more significant purchases, Andy a pack, bedding and rental car. 

We will try to borrow what we can to save money. 

MY PACK: It is probably a bit too big by this I mean capacity, but they really didn't have a large selection and my coupon was going to expire. 

They fit you at REI, and are very helpful. I originally did not want this pack due to the height of it looming over my head. Turns out that when this worker sized me he put me in a XS and it was so much better. 

Andy put about 20 LBs in it and I walked around and the pack felt even better. 

THE WEATHER:

So I have already gotten a summer weather alert. The weather in June is between 70-110'. But I am not going to worry about that now. One of the employees suggested I just bring a sheet, especially because menopause has turned me into a hot box. 

TRAINING:

I love this part! As soon as we get Andys pack we will start hiking. Just because I am a runner doesn't mean I am a hiker. This is all new terrain for me. I hope to start training in the next few weeks. 

In Closing, my concerns are not the distance we will be hiking, but the weight of the pack going out of the canyon. I have been warned that exiting out of the canyon is brutal.  Therefore, I shall just tuck that in the back of my little brain and entertain more pleasant thoughts like HOW Beautiful it is going to be! 

RUNDOWN: 

"It's amazing how the same pace in practice can feel so much harder than on race day. Stay confident. Trust the process." Sara Hall Pro Runer & Cofounder of the Hall Steps Foundation

Speaking of training. 

April marks my first 50K. This is a training run to get the legs turned over a little better. It is a trail race. 

This weekend I had a really discouraging weekend. I felt every day of my age.

49 never felt so sore, fatigued or exhausted as it did this weekend. 

I shared my grief of not being young anymore with Andy. He tried to encourage me telling me I just had a bad weekend. 

We had run trails together on Saturday in the cold, rainy, snowy weather that took a bite out of my confidence. Sunday, when I went for a solo 4 miler I couldn't get my legs to turn over and my heart rate was through the roof. Everything hurt, the voices in my head were hard to hear and rather than get a grip on them I entertained them into a pity party. 

I went to bed early in hopes I would sleep through the night and feel refreshed this morning. And it worked! 

MY take away. I have to be more intentional about RECOVERY. This means after a long run, CHILL OUT! I need to put my feet up, stretch, fuel and rest. 

Last weeks Miles: 56.3

Average weekly distance: 61 miles. 

Miles to date: over 700 

This is training. This averages out to ONLY 11 hours a week. Thats IT! There are 168 hours in a week. 

It just starts with lacing up those shoes. 

Believing in your abilities. 

Setting goals and daring to DREAM!! It starts with a dream. And it sure is exciting to watch the Lord move!! 

In Peace, not Pieces, 

Anita!

Identity Crisis: Deeply

"Setting goals requires gazing way out at the horizon of life. But once you set your course, most of the time your awareness should be on the trail under your feet." Lauren Fleshman

 I find myself sliding through the intersection of life a lot slower these days. I am at a season that I am able to throttle back and take life in stride. 

For so many years, I felt completely out of place. I would wrestle with my direction and my purpose. 

Running always helps settle my soul when I am wrestling with my identity. I can step away from this world and all the distractions involved. I can have a breakdown in my broken self and know that The Lord loves me in my imperfect hot mess. 

"Do not Love this world or the things in the world." 

Identity crisis is often the bi-product of looking at earth to long. 

• It is when I want to fit it.
• It is when I want to be part of something. 
• It is when I have been "Let Go". 
• It is when I have unmet expectations. 
• It is when I have allowed others to frame me. 
• It is when I have failed or missed the mark. 

 I run in the humility of my nothingness as a reminder I do not have be part of this world. 

We have to intentionally remove false identities this world and people have placed on us. 

I belong to HIM. I have these identity crisis relapses where I am trying to locate my identity all over again. 

Such an exhausting journey.

I rehearse the words from people I trusted. Words created to break me, to burden me, and to bury me. 

Good people, bad people and even Godly people. 

Most people will spend all their value and worth in the world and find themselves broken and spiritually bankrupt. 

Belonging: Connection

YOU are beautiful. YOU are fearfully and wonderfully made. 

YOU are uniquely made on Purpose with a Purpose. 

YOU are Equipped. 

YOU are Known. 

YOU are NOT what others say you are. 

YOU are NOT your failures. 

YOU are NOT yesterday's mishaps. 

I love that quiet space of vulnerability.

My breath, Deeply inhaling with every step. Fearfully asking God to "Search Me". I invite Him into the Deepest parts of my heart, foreign to most, including myself. 

I run Deeper and Deeper into His wings, this changes my sense of belonging. 

I am reminded I am Deeply cared for. 

I am Deeply known by Him.

I am Deeply Loved by Him 

I am Deeply accepted by Him 

RUNDOWN: Deeply. 

"How Good and pleasant it is when Gods people love together in unity." Psalm 133:1

This week I have ran trails, roads, by myself, with others and even ran a race. 

I have been circled around people I work with, I run with, I do life with, I go to church with, and I live with. Our human divisions should not mean anything when it comes to unity. I try to show up smiling, I try to go confidently in Christ, finding security in my identity in Him. 

Give grace deeply, smiles deeply, dig deeply to forgive, to love, to invite, accept and embrace others. 

My client came to visit me from Arizona for a haircut. "Anita, you're the only one I trust with my hair."
Tamara, is a beautiful soul, I love this gal. 

T 

Total weekly Miles: 

Mon: Trails 11miles

Tues: REST

Wed: REST

Thur: Backroads 18miles

Fri: Pot-O-Gold 4.8mile

Sat: Backroads 22.5

Sun: Trails 6.2

Total Miles: 62.5

Pot-O-Gold recap.

I had to work at 7:30am and was double booked for most of it. By the time I got out of work I was both tired from Thursdays long run and 7 hours of working on my feet. 

Andy and I headed to Flint to run one of our favorite local races put on by our favorite running shop, Complete Runner. 

I planned to run the 4 mile course with Andy, run not race. I wore a leprechaun onesie for fun. I began to get nervous when Andy suggested we run a "warm-up". You only run a warm up if you are going to race it. And unbeknownst to me, that is what Andy decided to do! 

The first mile we were having fun. I was cheering on all the runners and having fun. 

The second mile I was still rallying up the runners and even had a gal ask to run with me to help pace her.  Mile 3, the fun was dwindling. The wind about blew me over, Andy was pushing his pace. Coming into mile 4, I was huffing and puffing, my smiled turned into a sour frown and between going uphill and the wind catching my onesie I was falling apart! We finished the race and I mustered up a quick smile to counterfeit my misery! 

The race is well done and loaded with lots of hype. Complete Runner did a great job serving pizza, having prizes and doing drawings! That last mile of suffering served its purpose when I won 1st place female overall masters, getting older has its benefits! I won a pair of Brooks!! 

All glory to God! 

BIGGEST Smile, In Peace NOT peices!

Anita

Parts UnKnown: The Locker Room

 Sunday afternoon, I was in the locker room at the gym angry. I thought it was going to be sunny out, I really wanted the sun, I really needed the sun. The gloomy days have been poisoning my spirit and I had been looking forward to a blue sky all week. 

Pouting in the corner I stuffed my bag in a locker and overheard a conversation. I have no idea what they were talking about but the one lady comments "...parts unknown" 

"Hmm, I like that, a lot..." I thought as I quickly grabbed my phone and put it in my notes. 

It reminds me of Anthony Bourdain's Tv show I used to watch. Maybe that's what they were talking about, but that's not where it took me. 

Parts UnKnown.

Winter gone wild. 

I'm getting closed in. My shoes are snow soaked, my nose is constantly running like a toddler, my wardrobe is overused, and my skin is so pale I see more age spots than I care for. 

My head space is collecting head trash and I am living on a prayer!

My truck looks like a rolling turd from living on the back roads, my running clothes are collecting funky smells that no amount of fabric softener can remove, and I am buying myself flowers at Kroger's every week to get me closer to spring bloom's. 

Parts UnKnown. 

All these physical irritations. 

I ran around that track in shorts making the best of my bad attitude. First world problems ANITA! 

I stepped onto the track with a smile, with gratitude and an attitude adjustment until.... 

I felt my body sludge forward, tired, sore and sluggish. My shin still aching as I planted my foot down. If I ignore it, it will not be there. My hip flexors begin to pull, and another pain rears its head. 

A couple miles in I feel my right leg get heavy and begin to tingle. 

I hear Andys mom in my head with her favorite saying..." Its all good"!

Parts UnKnown.

Don't linger to long. 

The Lord arrests my heart. I am reminded that nothing is promised. I am not entitled to sunny skies and flowering petals. I am not promised a pain free body on this side of heaven. 

The difference between being in a rut and the grave is its dimensions. It is where you choose to linger. 

I don't know what I don't know. 

But what I do know is when I am in an emotional relapse ignoring the unknown is not so unknown. 

Parts UnKnown.

The Lord in the Locker room.

Back to the locker room. "Anita, Anita right? You had ......." I finished her awkward sentence as she stumbled for words. "Breast cancer..." I smiled with compassion. She shared my victory with love and excitement. 

Her name is Tracy. Truth is I met her during cancer and the unfortunate thing is I had so many parts unknown, her name escaped me, her story was as blank as a sheet of paper, and I felt like an idiot. The chemo took so many memories from me. I humbly asked her name right before her eyes welled up. 

"How are you, Tracy?" 

Her cheeks warmed up, her eyes watered, her hands began to shake, "I am having a really hard day...I lost my son 2 Christmases ago, I am having a really hard day..." 

You see I saw her on the track. I couldn't remember how I knew her. She saw me on the track and diverted her eyes. But I came back around to her and said "HI, Good job" as I passed her. and the next time I passed her I gave her a thumbs up. And when she went to the bike, we connected eyes and I smiled again at her. 

I had NO IDEA of her bad day. I had no idea of her parts unknown. 

"Can I hug you, Tracy?" I asked in the locker room. 

I wrapped my arms around her and told her how sorry I was. I stood in the back of the locker room listening to her "parts unknown", crying with her, loving her and knowing that what is "Unknown" to us is not "Unknown" to The Lord. The Holy Spirit directed me to her. 

As I showed up with a bad attitude the Lord orchestrated our hearts to connect. He softened my heart, and I was so unaware that a little smile and a word of encouragement would be something more to someone else. 

Parts Unknown.  

"Bear ye one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ." Gal 6:2

In Peace, Not Pieces, 

Anita~

Rest. 

Andy and I, our running date Saturday! 

We were meant for Connection

 "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Saturday was a total snow bomb. We were going to run trails and one by one we cancelled. As beautiful as it was outside, running outside was not an option. 

Andy and I shamelessly planned to go the GAC. But the rest of our group did not have access to the indoor track. The Lord has blessed me, I invited my friends to meet us out there with our passes. 

Goals

We all have goals. Some goals are altogether different than others but encouraging one another helps. We showed up helping one another. We have different strengths, different weaknesses, different goals, but we lifted one another up. 

Sunday was no different. After church Andy and I went out to help our friend, Sarah run her long run. It is her first marathon and she had 15 miles to run, the LONGEST distance she had ever run. 

There is a fear there, when we venture into unfamiliar territory our headspace gets clustered with fear and anxiety. For me being alone with that headspace is very challenging, having someone there for me gives me courage, strength and encouragement. 

ISOLATION

My friend Erin sent me a podcast to listen to last week. It was a Christian speaker discussing isolation. 

A gentle reminder of the problems with isolation and the power of connection. 

I have had seasons of isolation. The place depression lurks, creeps so close that its shadow romances you and embrace you more than people do, or so we try to believe. 

That place you question your purpose, your passion and your place in the world. 

CONNECTION

People can add value to our lives. Yes, they are challenging, but they also challenge us to be better. 

Life isn't met to be journeyed alone. 

Life can be too hard to be alone.

But Life can also be TOO wonderful to do alone. 

GRACE

It takes grace to show up for people and it takes grace to let others show up for you. 

People will let you down. Oh man do I know this. But the other side of that truth is I too have let others down. 

People will lift you up, love you, embrace you, people will teach you and guide you.  

"Bear ye one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ." Gal. 6:2

Solo is SELF. We have all been wounded by others. But when we encourage one another, it encourages us. 

Relate don't compare. Listen with love. 

"Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, Not neglecting to meet together, as the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day draw near." Hebrews 10:24-25

Accountability partners. 

Discipleship. 

Iron sharpens Iron. 

"And we urge you brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all." 1 Thess. 5:14

Be authentic, and people will accept you as you are and have a safe place to be their authentic selves. Share your weakness with confidence, fearlessly because your greatest audience is eternal not earthly. 

RUNDOWN:

The balance. Running is not the vision you see. It is all that you don't see. What you see is just a biproduct of the unseen. 

You see a smile. You see a victory. You see miles. You see through YOUR lens. But what you don't see is my heart. You don't see those hours my legs are turning over, and my soul is naked to the Lord. 

It is my church, and not in a spiritual sense, in an intimacy with my Father. 

I embrace my solo runs with my heavenly Father. Because I need Him to be on the Throne of my Heart before everything else. 

"The Fight is won or lost away from witnesses-behind the lines, in the gym, and out there on the road, long before I dance under those lights." Mahummad Ali

In Peace, Not Pieces, 

Anita~

Stepping Down

 "Step with care and great tact and remember that Life's a Great Balancing Act." Dr. Seuss

Frozen. I was a ICE CUBE. 

Sometimes we have to go backwards to go forwards. We need to practice the pause before we dive in full speed ahead. 

Life is crazy. It is a rat race out there. 

Obstacles.

Distractions.

Obstructions. 

Interruptions. 

We are all trying to find balance. 

I keep life down. I think it is important for me to just settle into a pace I can maintain. When I pick up the pace in life, I say things that are more absurd than my normal garble, get overwhelmed, feel defeated and get depleted. 

When I overextend my energy, I get burn out, misbehave or have mishaps.  These unfortunate responses lead me into the hurt locker, never a fun season.  

I enjoyed a running date Andy at Kensington last week. 

"Anyone can work hard. The best have the discipline to recover." 

Lauren Fleshman

Running isn't much different. That is why I chose to do a step-down week to recover. 

I can't say I'm the best, but I can say I am trying my best.  

My body was tired. 

My right shin was giving me some trouble. 

My piriformis is angry from strength training. 

And I am so sore, this 49 year old body is feeling beat up.  

I have had several 50-60 mile weeks. 

I usually take 2 days completely off but this week I took 3 days off and LOVED it! 

I knew I needed to preserve the balance of stressing out my body and recovering it. 

If you do not recover properly after training hard despite what you think, you will not get any faster and only make yourself more injury prone. 

Taking a step-down week can help you keep injury at bay by allowing your body to recover and repair micro tears and damaged tissue. 

A small decrease of 10-15% can be monumental. It might not seem like a lot, but a little bit makes a BIG difference. 

A down week helps keep me mentally as well. I want to LOVE running. I am so blessed to be able to run that I want to do it with ZEAL. I want to run as I am running onto the Lord. I want my passion for running to give God Glory. 

In everything I want to honor HIM. 

That means I have to have BALANCE. When running gets out of balance I have to question my "WHY". 

Running has to have proper order. 

Running should never be at the mantle of my heart, that is only for HIM. 

RUNDOWN:

I thought if we get started early enough, we would be able to dodge the sleet and rain scheduled at 10am. 

My running partners met at 7:45 at Rose Oaks. It is a perfect time for me to get up, get into The Word, pray and start the day. 

As smooth as the morning went it didn't take long for my morning to take a dive. Or maybe it was me that took the dive! Not even a mile into the run I slid on a ice patch and hit the ground like a sack of bricks! It was an ugly stumble. I literally laid there for a few seconds trying to make sure everything was still connected. 

We hit our first loop casual, at a conversational pace but that second loop we dropped a gear. 

I didn't even realize it was happening. I just followed the pace and never looked at my watch. 

I didn't want to get in my head. 

"Ohh, your going to be mad..." my running partner commented after mile 12.

"Don't tell me, I am just gonna keep running, I don't want to know." I replied. 

In the silence of my breathing and my feet hitting the pavement I thought to myself, "you gotta stay out of your head." 

As soon as you own your fears, your Fears OWN YOU. 

They become your narrative. I knew roughly what our pace was, I chose to be encouraged by the prospect of finishing strong. Even if I couldn't carry that pace in, I was going to give it a valiant effort. 

And know I didn't let fear hold me back. You don't know what you can do unless you just do it! 

We hit mile 13 and the wind kicked up, sleet began pelting us in the face, my clothes were soaked but I was still holding pace even in misery. 

When we hit the dirt road, everything was freezing. The road was a sheet of ice. We were now running in all the areas we were avoiding in the beginning of our run. We slowed our pace down but we were fighting harder to stay upright. 

We made it in without falling. We finished miserable, but glorious. I got in my car and never looked at my watch, I just knew, I gave God all the Glory. 

 

In Peace, not Pieces,

Anita

My "WHY", my inner child

 

It goes back many years now.

that little brown eyed girl.

her eyes shallow with fear,

her skin pale with innocence. 

dressed for the part but apart from it all. 

it goes back to That little girl. 

aware of the dysfunction

aware of the disconnect

aware of the disorder

aware of a disease.

it goes so far back before a conversation. 

not understanding

not comprehending

not at a place of security

and FAR from a place of peace. 

it goes back to a time undetermined.

it was a time of longing

it was a time of seeking

it was a time before GOD

it was a time of nothingness. 

it started with innocence removed

with security stripped away

with the noise of disorder

with the silence of depression

with my voice muffled but my heart screaming. 

it goes back to the inner Child

that small child begging for her mom to fight

that child pleading for her mother to not give up

that small child holding HER mother up each time she fell.

I learned to fight because i wanted my mother to. 

I learned to persevere because i needed my mother to.

I learned to be strong to take care of my broken heart.

losing your mom at 18 was hard, devastating. 

losing your mother to an overdose from addiction is a wound never healed

that inner Child is restless.

she was left with the insecurity of not being "enough"

an orphaned heart abandoned by addiction 

my WHY.

to fight the good fight.

that is where i found GOD

broken in a million pieces

a mess of confusion and conflict

on my knees

tear stained cheeks

ready to fight the world for redemption.

BUT GOD

He never took the fight out of me.

He just redirected it

my WHY isn't always Godly.

sometimes my WHY is still wanting the approval of a mom so far gone

sometimes wanting to hear the whisper of her telling me she is proud of me

sometimes i find myself listening quietly for " i love you anita", i am proud of you daughter". 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From the outside looking in people create their own canvas of others. 

Sunday, I ran a 4-hour event and took 1st place female. It wasn't because I am anything special. It is truly by the grace of GOD. I give Him all the glory. The first-place male came up to me with the BIGGEST smile, "ANITA, Anita, you are a legend..." He was so kind, repeating it again with his Hispanic accent. I found myself blushing. I thought about my WHY. 

I watched a reality show called "Special Forces". As I watched the celebrities' performing tasks, I would find my hands clenched, inspired and annoyed by the celebrities. 

The celebrities undergo a lot of physical and emotional torment. When one of the celebrities is under scrutiny the trainers bring them in and ask them this, "WHAT IS YOUR WHY?" 

This question struck home for me as I pondered it for days. 

"WHATS YOUR 'WHY' ANITA?"

"WHY ARE YOU HERE, DOING WHAT YOUR DOING?" 

The tip of the iceberg is all I have revealed. It has been very therapeutic for me to write it out. There is much more below the surface. 

But when seeking God for an understanding greater than mine I have humbly recognized my 49 year old self still missing the affection of not just her mother but also her father. 

Still missing the affirmation. 

Still missing the compassion. 

Still missing the forgiveness.

And yes, even the pride of a parent. 

My WHY is never giving up like I felt they did. I couldn't fight for my parents, fight their fight. If I could have fought for them in hopes of saving them from addiction I would have fought all of hell, trust me, I tried. 

• 2 Chronicles 15:7 "But you, take courage! Do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded." 
• Gal. 6:9 " And let us not grow weary in well doing, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." 
• 2 Timothy 4:7 "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 

In Peace, Not Pieces, 

Anita~

Sticky Notes.

I have these dreams, visions of adventures I want to do. The clock is ticking, and I am not getting any younger. My little heart beats with passion and excitement but can my body keep up? 

My soul is wild and free and by the grace of God I get to live it out. 

Every day is a gift. 

Will I have tomorrow? Will I have next week? Will I have regrets? 

I will have regrets but with every breath I will live this life out wild and free. 

 I have fears. The things that make me tremble. The tremble that excites, the tremble that ignites the passion of living life with boldness, with love, with forgiveness, with zeal and with inspiration. Living life with humility accepting the failures, the mishaps, the misdirection's as part of my make up. Not proudly but humbly in reverence to my God. 

Sticky Notes: 

After getting cancer I was reminded life is made of moments and all those moments matter. 

Those moments make us who we are. 

We shouldn't have a life full of sticky notes that coIlect dust. We need to plan on making them happen! 

Which brings me to a 3-year Sticky Note. 

3-year Sticky Note: 

The Grand Canyon. An adventure I listened to many years ago from a friend of mine, Holly P. Hollys father hiked the canyon every year. I was always in awe of his courage and strength to hike the depths of the canyon well into his 60's and even 70's. 

3 years ago, we put in for the lottery to backpack it. I have never backpacked. We put in 6 tickets. But no one got in. 

But Andy got in, without me. His 30-year friends planned a guy's trip, and all went. 

But my sticky notes still held that adventure. 

Andy came home with a stronger desire to take me there. So we tried again in January to get in for May. Nothing, a no go. 

Feeling defeated but with a glimmer of hope we put in again in February knowing this would be out last try before the heat would be unbearable in June. (You put in 6 months to the date you want to go.) 

AND I GOT the EMAIL! 

3 Year Sticky NOTE, 3rd times a charm!!! 

Leaning on Andy. 

YEAH Buddy we are going to the Grand Canyon!! 

3 days, 2 nights hiking with a 40lb backpack. Another kind of training! 

Just the two of us. Together we have learned how much stronger we are in our weaknesses. Getting cancer taught me to let Andy take care of me. It humbled me. I learned to lean on him the way the Lord designed. Pride prevented me from letting Andy take care of me. We have learned to lean on one another. I love leaning on him. 

When Andy talks about his experience I am hanging onto every word. I love hearing him talk about the plan. "Andy, can I carry the pack?" I ask with concern. 

"Don't worry we will train, and I will help you, you will be fine." 

We have to give ourselves permission to live a BIG LIFE. Stepping into yourself. Stop living life little, because you are meant for greater things! 

SNOWMOON 25K: Share Your Light

"For you light my lamp, The Lord my God illuminates my darkness."  Psalm 18:28

Saturday night a group of us from Complete Runner drove out to Midland for our favorite winter night run. I never RACE this because the trail is usually a frozen, icy, snowy mess. It is a great way to get my miles in, have fun with friends but not risk injury racing. 

This year I started laughing and carrying on with my friends but somehow, I pulled ahead and lost them before the first loop, a 3-mile loop I would have to run 5 times for the 25K. My light wasn't working great so I tucked in behind 2 runners to run in their light. Thats when I saw these long bare legs that looked like Andys. I know those legs even in the dark! I took me about a half a mile to catch up to him. 

Andy was surprised to see me and tried to encourage me to race it, "GO Anita, Run it" But I responded the same way about a half a dozen times, "NO! I am not racing it!" I ran a few feet in front of Andy so he could use my light. My eyes adjusted and I forgot I had another light on my jacket! I ran with him for his 15K and had to finish the last 2 loops solo. It was a little lonely but I encouraged every runner I passed and every runner who passed me! 

Funny how I played it forward with my LIGHT! 

Let your light shine! Someone needs your light, even when you think your light is dim, someone out there still needs your light! 

ALL advice is encouraged!!! Please share!! 

I prayed over every admission. I pray big, I pray bold, and I pray knowing God is good even when He delivers a NO. 

In Peace, Not Pieces

Anita