I should have made a better mental note that it was Monday. The day of the week that if something is going to go kittywampus, Monday is that day.
I laid there with my left side crushed in the railroad tracks. I felt a sharp piecing pain through my elbow as I struggled to get up. I reached my left hand out to lift me off the railroad ties only to discover my hand throbbing like someone was hitting it with a hammer. I hurt so bad I began to shake, questioning the strength in my legs as I stumbled to my feet. I began assessing the damage, trying to move my fingers, I saw a gash on my palm from the jagged rocks heavily scattered on the tracks. Everything hurt so bad, I felt drained of all energy. I knew better. I should never have been running on the tracks. I just had to turn around to find my arm sleeve. It was a miracle I didn't fall the first time I ran down them to Academy road but when I discovered I had lost my new "Rooster Endurance" arm sleeve I turned around and jumped back on the tracks to retrace my steps. I turned unto the tracks and my foot slipped on the railroad ties, down I went like a sack of potatoes. My heart was pounding and I just wanted to quit but I was 3 miles from home and I wanted to find my arm sleeve. So I just walked, waiting to feel good enough to try and run again.
When I didn't feel better I called Andy. "Andy, I fell, really hard, I think I broke my finger.....My elbow is hurting really bad...." Andy responded "..are your legs working? How are your feet?....Can you move?.."
I hung up with Andy and slowly picked up my pace. Get back up, dust your self off and keep going.
Monday.
It started out with over 8 hours of sleep, I can not tell you the last time I have slept like that in months. Granted the sleep was a bit over due considering I had been up for about 24 hours supporting a runner friend of ours to his first 100 mile race. CONGRATS to RYAN. This guy ran his first 100 down the Paint Creek and Polly Ann Trail. I ran and biked with him for 25 miles. I brought the bike and my speaker for the last 10 miles, somewhere around 2am. RUNNERS NOTE: There is power in music, once the music started jamming he dropped his pace more than 3 minutes a mile! For a 23:17 hour 100miler!
Refreshed, recovered and ready to take on a busy day, I tackled each appointment this morning with flying colors.
*Dr. Hainer (Breast Surgeon) 10:30am. I waited in my fancy patient room with my jeans on and a pink paper vest covering my tatas. I love my plastic surgeon. This is my 4th appointment to decide if I should have one more surgery. I have a lot of ripples still. I was warned that this could happen because I didn't go bigger. Dr. Hainer comes in wearing scrubs and matching blue Crocks. "How are you doing Anita?" I smile as I always do and say "Good". I smile inside because it really is the truth. I am doing good. "Come over here, let me take a look." I hop off the table and walk around facing him. His hands are cold, I can feel this. I moves my breast around, mumbling under his breath. Then he is silent and just starting at me. "Well, What do you think?" I respond, "WHAT do you think?" And very assertively he says "I'm not happy, this is what I want to do......Lets move forward ....its an easy surgery..." And just like that we decided to go through with one more surgery. I trust his judgment. I have been through a lot the last year, I want to be done but I want no regrets. Cancer has taken a lot from me, I do not want to finish this with any second thoughts. So with all courage and faith I will go under the knife one more time. Before Dr. Hainer left he redirected his concern to my scars under my breast. "Anita, what are you taking for those?" I responded "Nothing, I keloid so I just assumed that was the way they should look." And then I got a lesson on keloids. I actually have a "Hypertrophic Scar"
Keloid is a type of raised scar. Unlike other raised scars, keloids grow much larger than the wound that caused the scar. Not everyone who gets a scar will develop a keloid. If you have keloid-prone skin, however, anything that can cause a scar may lead to a keloid
Where my scars have not grown out of the wound, they are just angry looking. He sold me a adhesive that will go over the wound and help to heal it.
Smiling after leaving Dr. Hainers to move into the final phase, I headed to the dentist for my 6 month cleaning. My teeth looked good, this surprised me. The chemo did so much damage in every part of my body I was afraid to get my results of my cleaning.
Unconsciously, I found myself getting dressed to run outside. A rain run might be a little miserable but not as miserable as wearing a mask in the gym and losing 40 minutes of drive time there and back. I had no idea how miserable it was going to get.
I never found my arm sleeve as I took the long route backwards. I saw Andy running towards me. He came to meet me and check on me on his run. I stopped my watch and rested my head on his chest. I showed him all my boo boo's and he laughed at me. "Ok, your going to be alright..." I was, I just wanted to be babied a little. I decided to get my head in the game and head back home a little stronger, a little faster. No sense in giving up over a few cuts and scrapes, right?
That was today's Little Lesson. Fall down, cry, scream maybe even cuss. Then catch your breath, get up, assess the damage, clean yourself off and get back out there. I initially wanted to quit. I went to call Andy to pick me up and take me home. I was in agony. I finished that run, I might have ran slower, I might have looked like a drowned rat with mascara smeared all down my face. I might have looked like I lost in a cat fight but I finished todays run. Don't Quit. Get back out there.
A fun run with the girls this week. DONUTS! Rachel lead us on the course for the Applefest virtual 4 miler. Diehls gave us cider and donuts for running the course!
~ANITA
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