Get A GriP! Finding Contentment in the 1 degree

 "You will make known to me the path of life. In your presence is the fullness of joy..." 

Psalms 16:11

The difference between ice and water is one degree. That little shift, almost unnoticeable, something minimum can create such a monumental change. 

I have been thinking about that a lot lately.

We live in a world that craves instant gratification, a world that we control nearly everything with a swipe or a click...until something happens that we can no longer control. Life on life's terms tends to show up and remind us how little we actually do control. A lovely place of humility. And when life stops obeying OUR timeline, we want everything to snap back to "normal" right away.  And sometimes "normal" wasn't that normal anyway....

One DEGREE

I am now over a month into this recovery and honestly, there are days I wonder if this lingering injury is my new normal. But then I remind myself- "GET a Grip Anita". 

One degree at a time. One percent shifts add up. Change often happens quietly before it appears obvious. 

Today, I was able to get in 10 miles at Independence Oaks, and even that came with it's own questions. I couldn't quite tell if the soreness I was enduring was from injury, elevation or the exercises I'm doing to climb my way out of this injury. Sometimes, the sacrifices we make to get better or be better hurt just as much as the thing we are trying to fix! 

But to honest as I have been thinking about all this-all the time, if we want real change in our lives, it is going to COST us something. 

We are going to have to sacrifice.

We are going to have to work hard. 

And we are going to have to be patient with the process, EVEN when the process feels so painfully slow.

I am noticing that buried in the slowness of my recovery are those teeny tiny almost invisible steps towards healing. I might need a magnifying glass to see them, but they're there. 

CONTENTMENT. 

A word that has been shared multiple times in the last week, I think it was God's free commercial to me. 

Even when things are not going my way, contentment brings peace to my current moment or my circumstance. I am reminded to find joy in the little things to help me through. Today, while running with a friend, we talked about exactly this-THE LITTLE THINGS. If I don't take time to locate them then I miss out on gratitude, and that is what keeps me anchored. Without gratitude and contentment, peace will always feel just out of reach. 

The RUNDOWN.

So, for now, I'll keep looking for the 1%. The little things that make a monumental difference. 

Because if I can be honest, "getting a grip" is just not taking myself too serious. 

Like when I'm doing my weekly workouts and adding incline to the TM and the numbers don't come near my Garmin's. My Garmin makes me look like a rockstar. If confidence was measured in treadmill/Garmin stats I'd be RECOVERED! 

But today, I was grateful for 10 trail miles. 

I was also grateful for a friend to run it with, Monday, I couldn't even find a soul to run with me and the voices in my head were awful encouragement.  

My ten miles got me to 20 miles for the week. Not perfect. Not pain free. But PROGRESS, 

one percent-at-a- time progress. 

And maybe that is what "getting a grip" means: holding tight to the little victories, the contentment, the laughter, and the small degrees of change that keep us moving forward, even when the process feels slow. 

Because right now one degree makes all the difference, and I am choosing to "grip" that tightly. 

Super thankful for my run today to get to talk all this out!

In peace, not pieces, 

Anita

The Realities of RED FLAGS: HOPE

 "And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulations bring about perseverance, and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope: Romans 5:3-4

Each year older brings me to the reality the I am capping the mountain of life. My sweet Grandma always said to me, "Anita, I have climbed up the mountain, and I am on my way back down.".  The truth in my grandma's words always stung. I viewed her as the strongest women I knew. I borrowed her strength secretly, I found myself clinging to it in my infant faith, I needed hers. 

HOPE

The last few weeks I have had to surrender myself in the maze of life. The path has been a bit unmarked, and I have found myself stumbling and unclear which direction to go. 

I haven't found clear directions and the wandering feels fierce, but I cling to the Lord. I grapple in hope that He is leading me blindly and it is frightening the unknown. 

HOPE

The warm summer of comfort has dissolved, and the gloom is sneaking in. My body is creaking just a bit more this season and my injury is adding some unwanted details. 

HOPE

I am three weeks out from intentionally facing the realities of RED FLAGS.  

INJURIES from my own stupidity. 

Denial is not a river in Egypt. I saw the red flags; hey, I felt the red flags and the truth is I had friends confront me with my red flags even. 

But the reality of the red flags set in when I had to step down from running. 

I confused HOPE with HURT. I HOPED that my HURT body was not a big deal even though the Lord had shown me otherwise. 

HOPE doesn't sugar coat of circumstances. 

HOPE doesn't glaze over the heartbeat of hardships. 

HOPE doesn't give us false truths to build our ego. 

BUT what HOPE does is so much more. 

HOPE redirects our meandering into HIS message. 

HOPE strengthens us as we go out cautiously into uncharted territories. 

HOPE shines the direction that we are searching for. 

SO many of us are drifting through mine fields. We are beaten up by this broken world and broken relationships. We are scared to make a move, and we are disoriented by the damage of our last steps.

Some of us struggle to hold onto HOPE because we are still searching for the God we have heard of but the god we feel has delivered so much pain. 

HOPE

Hope didn't dissolve my red flags. Hope gave me grace to accept them and confront them. Hope gave me the courage to face my character defects, and the Lord picked me up from that ugly realization. 

Hope reaches down for me in my faults and flaws. Then Hope stands me back up, holds me and directs my feeble spirit forward. 

Some life events have reminded me that hope has no limitations. And while the visibility of hope may not always shine brightly, it still outshines the darkness. 

Hope closes the gap of discouragement and despair, but it requires action. You have to exercise it. 

HOPE

THE RUNDOWN

I continue to keep my miles down and stay off the pavement. I am still doing my McGill's 3 - 6days a week along with other strength training. I have been hitting the gym again, rowing, stair climber, weights and dreadmill work out. 

DREADMILL workout: Start the incline at 3 and pace at about 9:30min/mi. I increase the incline and do about 3.5-4 miles. I add running backwards with the incline and a I just added a decline of 3%. 

 This week I slowly added more miles and was grateful to get to run at Pontiac Lake today. 

I have HOPE. HOPE doesn't ignore RED FLAGS-it helps me face them with honestly and courage. It steadies my heart when my body or circumstances warn me to slow down, listen, adjust or accept. Hope gives me gives me the courage instead of fear and the peace to trust Him. 

But I have a lot of hard work today. Hope doesn't always give instant results or even the results we might think we deserve. 

Hope does give peace though. And that's what I need to settle my drifting heart and anchor me in His will for me. 

"Now may the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13

**PLEASE share what HOPE is to YOU, I would love to hear. 

In Peace Not Pieces

ANITA~

The Things I Do Not Want To Do

 "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." 

Romans 7:15

Andersons orders have been to keep running, 

• but cut the load way back
• get off the pavement
• do the "McGills 3's"
• check out Squat University
• get stronger

I laughed when Dana Anderson told me to start strength training. I knew it was coming. 

So I am 2 weeks out, doing all the things he said and feel just as old and broken. I took two days off this week, reluctantly. 

I do the things I do not want to do. 

I am doing these exercises that look so basic and find myself sweating in frustration as I am humbled at the struggle in them. 

And the things I want to do I don't. 

I wanted to run so bad yesterday, but I didn't. 

I didn't run for 2 days, hoping today was going to be the day I felt like a gazelle through the woods.

The sky was as crystal clear, an endless gazing blue that invited you out to play. 

I wanted to run and run, but I knew I couldn't. I didn't even know what my body would do.  

I could see my breath as I got out of my truck at the trail head. And I smiled. 

I was going to give this run all my emotions. 

All my heart. 

All my frustrations. 

All the best and all the worst I had. 

 

I have been running mostly solo because this injury feels so burdensome and I don't want the pressure of being "Chipper" when I feel like dookie. 

I could smell the wet leaves, and the woods were calling me. Life was calling me to go forward, to lay it all down and go. I was scared to move not knowing how my body would respond. 

It only took a few steps onto the trail to feel my body want to pull back. I have learned that my body will loosen up after a couple miles, so I just needed to GO!

The trail was covered in beautiful amber and red leaves.  This beautiful path is hiding ankle breaking roots, sharp rocks and a mystery of unhinged injuries waiting to happen. 

I felt fear as my heart skipped a beat as I tried to get my body to dance around the obstacles. 

My voice was screaming over my music, "Stay Strong" and "Pick up your feet". 

My hands were in fists tucked in my jacket as I slowly warmed up. The chill faded away pretty fast as I decided I would run all the hills. If it was going to hurt, I may as well go all in. 

And I went. My body cooperated with some back talk. 

With every mile I fought off frustration and focused the finish. I welcomed the solitude in prayer and praise even in my pain. 

The woods hid me deep inside her home. The brief windows of light shattered the dim lit forest, at times blinding you. After a while, I forget about the ache in my piriformis. I was in love. 

I ran 6 miles. I would have loved 2 loops but embraced the one loop with gratitude the Lord allowed me to have those. 

THE RUNDOWN:

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." 

Romans 7:15

While I was running, I was thinking of this verse. It felt rather fitting when I was thinking about my week of running/not running. 

The verse actually encouraged me. sometimes doing the right thing feels so awful. I hate following these orders. I want to do what I WANT. And the truth is, that is probably why I am in this position of pain all together! 

A good reminder that sometimes we have to do the very thing we do not want to do. And it doesn't always make sense or feel good, but it is the good thing. 

OCT 13-19-34 Miles

OCT 20-26-27 Miles

OCT 27-NOV2- 26Miles

I have cut my miles back about 40%. I will stay here for the month of November. 

In Peace, not Pieces.

Anita