"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, Who is in you, Whom you have received from God? ... So use every part of your body to give glory back to God..." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Wednesday, April 29, 2020

One Wild and Precious Life

"Here lies another day, during which I have had eyes, ears, hands, and the great world round me; and with tomorrow begins another. Why am I allowed two?" 
G.K. Chesterton 

Everyday I celebrate life. This month marks the 1 year anniversary of being diagnosed with TNBC.
No matter the smile, the good attitude or the positivity I tried to share, death felt like just a breath away many times.

"I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." John 10:10

I do not take my days for granted.
Life is not lived through the media, through our jobs, through what the headlines present or what others say, life is lived through moments.

Life is celebrated through gratitude. Life is embraced through passion.

During this quarantine many have lost their lust for life. I believe that we should take serious what is serious but that does not mean we can't laugh, smile and live abundantly.

I refuse to let this pandemic hold my emotions.

I am still setting goals and finding joy EVERYDAY.

Today, I did something EPIC. I went back to conquer Holdridge.
HOLDRIDGE, AKA Grubers Grinder, East loop.
Distance 16 miles. (Marked as 15.5 however, it is a half mile to the start of the trail.)
Very technical.

Last week, I went out to run this and got terribly lost turning this 16 miler into over 18.
I was really bummed. I had wanted to see what my baseline for this trail would be. In group runs we always ran it in 3h 5min.

I had everything laid out waiting for me in the morning. I knew it was going to be raining so I needed everything prepared so I wouldn't back out.

I was dragging when my alarm went off at 7am. I drank my coffee, had some oatmeal and headed out the door at 8:35.
I wasn't feeling it.

THE PLAN:
RUN. Keep the run transparent. No stopping my watch to pee, to poo, or to take a picture. I needed to know what my body could do without stopping. Stopping my watch would be like cheating for me.
I needed to run fatigued, out of breath or whatever element came my way.
I wanted to try and average 12-12:30 minute trail miles. Due to all the switchbacks that does not dictate your actual pace. But I thought I could maintain that pace.
With the soggy trail, I was excited to try out my new Brooks Cascadia trail shoes.

Off and Running: I didn't make it 2/10th of a mile and had to stop my watch. I wanted to get a picture of my new shoes to do a before and after.
I kept waiting for this run to feel comfortable, it never did.
I let my watch coach me every mile. I kept trying to maintain 12min/miles. I used my watch for mileage NOT the trail markers.
When I approached the split in the trail where I got lost last week, I stopped my watch, read the sign out loud and took off in the right direction after less than 10 second.
I didn't even have the energy to pat myself on the back for not getting lost.
Being on the trail alone is a little unsettling. Especially when I am counting about a dozen beer cans out there. I almost got ran over by 3 deer. I had startled them bedded down. They were so close I could have almost touched them. The wildlife is more than the beer drinkers. I saw a beautiful hawk swoop down by me. Near the swamp, I jumped over a  snake who looked petrified on the path and a huge turtle camped out in the grass.
But my body was really struggling. Through the orchard it was a thick muddy mess. I had to walk and try to find the best line I could through the muck.....BUT I didn't stop my watch. It was my slowest mile 12:56.


I FINISHED! It was very hard. When I came out of the trail I was a little emotional.
"Why am I allowed two...?
The damp chill rested on my bare arms with rain beginning to drizzle.
Today, I got to feel the rain, the chill in the air, the soreness of my muscles, the heaviness of my lungs, Today, I was not just able to run 16 miles but I was able to run in in one of my fastest times, 2h:40min.

"We're starved for a life that not only senses the sacred in the world around us but savors it. We're famished for experiences that are real, relationships that are deep, work that is meaningful. I think what we're longing for is "the good life" as it has been advertised to us in the American dream but life in its fullness, its abundance. The reflective life is a life that is attentive, receptive, and responsive to what God is doing in us and around us." Mary Oliver

And in conclusion she asks "What is it that you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" 

In Conclusion....Andy signed me up for a virtual 50k THIS WEEKEND. I must be out of my mind.
Yeti Ultra run 50K. 
*Run 5 miles every 4 hours for 24 miles.
I am not sure how my body will handle this. It sounds like fun though!

Monday, April 20, 2020

Lost. Grubers Grinder

I'm just not one of those people that wear a T-shirt that says "I love hills"! I don't "Eat hills for breakfast" and I don't talk about how fun they are.
You will never see me climbing a hill and looking like I am having fun.
BUT what you will see is me huffing and puffing, grunting, whining and probably the ugliest face you have ever seen.
The list of things that I am not good at far exceeds the list of things that I am good at.
I am NOT good at running hills anymore than I am good at DIRECTION which proved itself today.
Yep, I passed this st stinking more than once! 

Holdridge, Grubers Grinder, East loop. 16 miles. 
I had this idealistic thought of running my favorite trail today. Grubers Grinder at Holdridge. It was a test.
To test my endurance and to test my strength as I continue to build both my miles and my body. The first 5 miles is mostly all hills.
This is a very technical trail saturated with switchbacks and hills. It doesn't have a lot of overall elevation but the hair pin turns, roots and rocks will have you picking up your feet or your face planting.

I was running very smooth and felt great for the first 7 1/2 miles. I had decided I would run steady, but not stop my Garmin, not even to eat or pee.
I was on track for a sub 3 hour run until I got turned around.
The problem with Trail Running is that every season the trail looks brand new, At least to me! I try to have markers planted in my mind, but my mind has a few handicaps.
I got so turned around today. I was fairly confident of my where a bouts until I came unto mile marker 9 TURNED AROUND. Then I was certain I had taken a wrong turn.
Due to the fact that so many people are saturating the trails, the side trails that used to be barely visible are as wide as the main trail.
I looked at my watch and turned around, only almost a mile later I discovered I was running the right way.
Between mile marker 7-10 there are multiple side trails. So of course I got turned around again!
I would be over 2 miles of extra mileage.
I considered calling the boys to get me. I had paced myself for 16 miles not 18.
Worst case scenario, I walk it in.
"I ain't no QUITTER" I heard Lacey in my ear. Last week, she did a bike ride that she thought was 24 miles but ended up closer to 35. I drove out to check on her and see if she wanted me to drive her home. But she refused to quit.
I just told myself to get to the next mile marker. I had slowed my pace way down. I was trying to ration my water. When I hit the 14.5 mile marker I was out of water and getting hot.
I was almost done. I assessed my body and was shocked how well I felt. Especially considering I had lost track on not only my direction but also how many times I had tripped! I only fully fell once catching myself on my hands. This is a sure way to know you are tired, you quit picking up your feet and start tripping.

"Don't try to rush progress. Remember- a step forward, no matter how small is a step in the right direction." Kara Goucher


You can see where I double backed on the trail. I had to stop my watch I was so confused. As  I looked at this sign like it was going to tell me to follow the Yellow Brick Road, I was sweating and confused when this biker came out of NO WHERE and yells "Have a good walk!" I was CRUSHED! Walking? I was RUNNING, SORTA! 
I actually had to call Andy to help me get through the last couple miles.  I needed a voice bigger than my own, so I even said some extra prayers. 

I DID IT! Over 18 miles, 3 hours and 17 minutes. I was grinning from ear to ear. 
Today, really helped boost my confidence. Now, I need to pull the reigns back a little. I can enjoy todays victory but not get too bold and break myself. 

It is a good reminder that you are making progress even when you don't know it as long as you don't quit. Todays run proved that. 
Most people quit right before something amazing is about to happen. 
The progress is happening as long as you keep going. 
Anita~
NOTE- Grubers, due to all the switchbacks only shows about 13 miles on your Garmin.

Thursday, April 16, 2020

A lot can CHANGE in a year.


The rest of the world has gone on in the ways which they do.
Life has moved on. As it should I suppose.

But not for me. Today...Oh today, the warmth of my humbled spirit flooded my cheeks.
I needed some quiet time. I put my shoes on and headed out to run and to feel closest to God.
"A lot can change in a year..."
One year ago, I was running down the very same roads sobbing. Blinded by the tears that erupted from my eyes.
SO scared.
SO confused.
SO helpless.
A cancer diagnosis.  A very aggressive cancer. "OH GOD NOO" I sobbed just one year ago.
Today, was a cry of great humility. Gratitude, extreme thankfulness.

I heard the lyrics of Laura Daigle and my body shook, overwhelmed with emotion. I wasn't even a half a mile from my house. I couldn't run, I could barely walk as I folded in the lyrics of this song.
You are not hidden
 There's never been a moment
You were forgotten
You are not hopeless
Though you have been broken
Your innocence stolen
I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS
I will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you
There is no distance
That cannot be covered
Over and over
You're not defenseless
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your armor
I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS
I will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you
I will never stop marching to reach you
In the middle of the hardest fight
It's true, I will rescue you
It was like this song was made for me. 

A LOT CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR:

  • April 4th: Biopsy
  • April 16th: Dr. Sullivan Stage 2 TNBC 
  • April 17th: Meet Pam Johnson, Breast Surgeon
  • April 23rd: Meet Dr. Matthew Cotant Onchologist
  • April 26th: CT scan
  • April 29th: MRI & Bone scan
  • April 30th: Colonoscopy
  • May 1st: Dr. Sullivan PORT put in
  • May 2nd: Echo
  • May 6th CANCER CLASS
  • May 8th: 1st CHEMO A/C biweekly 8 weeks biweekly
  • May 15th Karmanos Genetic Testing
  • July 3rd Start CarboP every 3 weeks w/ my weekly Taxol 12 more weeks of CHEMO. 
  • August 5th: Blood Transfusion Couldn't receive chemo this week. 
  • August 19th: Meet Dr. Hainer, Plastic surgeon
  • September 25th:FINAL CHEMO!
  • October 10th: Ultrasound
  • October 30th: Double Mastectomy
  • November 12th:  CANCER FREE
  • Novemeber14th: Breast tubes removed
  • November 19th: Meet Dr. Boike, Radiologist
  • December 2nd: Surgery, ovaries removed
  • December 3rd: Surgery 
  • December 18th: Dr. Sullivan Removes port
  • January 6th: FIRST Radiation, everyday 25 treatments.
  • January 22: Dr. Siatczynski, Injured knee
  • January 27th: Start PT on knee, 8 weeks 
  • March 16th: Covid-19 Quarantine begins
Life does not go back to the way it used to be for a cancer patient. 
Life has deep meaning. Its depth is immeasurable. 

It was just a year ago....So much can change in JUST A YEAR. 
Today, I woke up without a port embedded in my chest. 
I didn't have to get another blood draw, I was always frightened they would roll my veins. 
I didn't have to wake up and CONVINCE myself I was good, painting a smile across my face. 
I don't feel nauseas, sick, sweaty or bloated. 

A LOT can change in a year. 
LIVE life to the fullest. 
Love Life.
Smile More.
Love More. 
Appreciate ALL things.

RUNDOWN: I ran 10 miles today. I dedicated them all to those who have gone through BREAST CANCER, or are currently going through. Don't give UP. Stay Strong and  Keep your Faith. 

Sending extra prayers to Ashley and Alice as they continue to go through Chemo for breast Cancer. I Pray for your health and safety daily.
I pray for Cindy as she gets ready to start radiation for her breast cancer. She has had a rough road. 
I am also sending LOVE to Hilary S. for her beautiful testimony as a breast cancer survivor. 
I am very inspired by my sweet cousin LILA as she and I battled the exact same cancer and also shared the BRCHA 1 mutation.  Together we battled this year. Lila never waivered in her faith and was always a light. 
And the biggest thank you to MOM and DAD. EVERYDAY mom texted me, she never missed a treatment. She never stopped praying for me, taking care of me and supporting me and my family.


Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced. James Baldwin

Anita

Wednesday, April 15, 2020

I say this in LOVE: GRATITUDE

"For From Him, and through Him and for Him are all things." Romans 11:36

I headed down the back roads to run the trails at Holly Rec.
 Many runners have been killing it with their training. Posting their hard runs and fast runs all of which really began to inspire me. 
I had been motivated to try to run the 6 mile loop hard.

My truck was still freezing on my drive out there. As I drove I began to pray, "Dear God, please give me strength, and endurance, please keep me upright and ….."
It was like a dagger in my heart. I was convicted and riddled with guilt as I was stopped in mid prayer.
"God, please forgive me, I am so sorry, I am asking you yet again to give me more than I deserve especially when I didn't seek you this morning with gratitude..." 

Shame on me. Asking yet again for more from God when all he asks for is a little bit of my time. I was barely given God my  table scraps when he has blessed me with life, health and healing.

Practicing GRATITUDE 
Everyday should be filled with gratitude.
Yes, its April and it snowed today....But the sun shared her pretty face and I had eyes to see it.
Today, when my feet stepped onto the floor from my bed they didn't hurt as bad as they had been. I didn't grab the corner of my dresser to balance myself like I normally have to do, I am in so much pain.
I have this full head of curly locks, 5 months ago I was bald, now  I have this little afro, even a bad hair day is better than a no hair day.

I am so grateful in this quarantine. While so many are voicing their opinions shared with negativity and anger,  I am finding the MOST Gratitude.
I am Grateful to have my health back again. I have two friends that are finishing up their chemo. My heart goes to them everyday.
I have both my boys home and they are healthy. That alone trumps anything one could think about complaining about.
I have postage stamps to send cards to encourage others.
I have internet to be able to get on a Zoom call for our Support group on Tuesday nights.
I don't have a big house or extravagant things, I live a very humble life. I do not require a lot. I am grateful for the little things.
God has shown me so much mercy and grace.
And God has shown you mercy and grace.
Stop complaining, quit pouting, choose Joy and have an attitude of gratitude.


Rundown: 
I ran the  Wilderness Loop. And God kept me upright when my legs felt like were going to crumble beneath me. I thought of where I was last year. SICK and not even knowing why I was so sick. Anemic and getting iron infusions. I was weak and ignorant of this cancer that had invaded my body.
I ran with everything I had through those trails. I clenched my little fists and gritted my teeth as I tried to maintain my pace going up another hill.
Flashback after flashback flooded my memories reminding me of how far I have came.
Humbled.
There was no self pride. There was no self. It was purely the grace and mercy of God.
I was breathless. My legs were getting heavy.
I looked at my watch and smiled.
Thank You God.

"Praise the Lord, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good: His love endures forever." 
Psalm 106:1


I encourage you to start you morning out with gratitude.
  • Maybe you need to make a Gratitude Journal, penning all that you are thankful for. 
  • Maybe your family is complaining a lot, try a Gratitude Jar, everyday penning something you are grateful for and putting it in the jar, then sharing them as a family at the end of the day or week. 
  • Make a Journal of Mercy, listing Gods grace and mercy on you. 

Until you DIE to Self you will never find contentment.
"Gratitude isn't anchored in ease, it is anchored in intimacy."  It takes real intimacy to look beyond yourself and give Him the glory. To die to self and recognize all that you have and Let GO of all that you want.
"Who can list the Glorious miracles of the Lord? Who can praise Him enough?" Psalm 106:2


Anita~

There are a lot of angry people right now, mad they can't do what they want to do.
It could be worse.
Build a bridge and get over it.
I say this in LOVE~

Friday, April 10, 2020

Quarantined day #23

ONE of my masks that Angie W made. 
Here we are, 23 days into this quarantine thing. A pandemic. A plague that has gone global.
Today, I was invited to join a new facebook group "Michiganders Against Quarantine". With the first question "Just curious, do any of you know someone personally that has Covid-19?"
Over 2.1K comments and 31 shares.
We are at conspiracy theories at only day 23.
Yes, I do know people personally.
Yes, I have a husband that works with Dialysis and they can hardly keep up. 2 hospitals have contacted him to help with their nursing shortage.
I haven't been to any stores since March 19th.
And not because I am concerned about me....rather I am concerned for others. Others, like my 95 year old Maw Maw who would most likely not survive it.
I am not celebrating Easter with all my family because I love my family more.
I quit PT so I wouldn't be around the general public so I could be there for my maw maw who was down to only 2 caretakers.
Its a few weeks, I don't need anything bad enough. I don't need to be remodeling or planting that bad.
God knows, I KNOW what it is like to be a little rather A LOT uncomfortable for A LOT longer.

I read comments where people were complaining about being cooped up in ther houses with nothing to do. There is so much to do.
My client who had to close her bakery, baked and donated over 700 cookies and donuts. If you can't find something to do, just ask. If you are wanting to go out to buy stuff non essential go out and volunteer.


Sunday: I ran the backroads at Rose Oaks, 15 miles
Monday: I threw my kayak in the back of my truck and dropped it in a little lake by my house.
Tuesday: I visited and cleaned Maw Maws house, painted my bedroom with a gallon of paint I FOUND in the basement! Then when Andy came home we ran 7 miles together.
Wednesday: I gathered up my running clothes and headed out to Holly Rec for a fun 6 miler on the trails. I came home to make food for the boys and throw the kayaks in the truck with Austin for some sun and smiles down the Shiawasi River. And even went back out that night for a mile walk down the backroads looking for rocks.
Thursday: I was having so much fun in the local parks I headed out to Pontiac Lake for 10 miles.
Friday: I went back to check on Maw Maw and was there for 2 hours. When I got home, finished cooking and cleaning Alec says "I want to go for a walk." I quickly responded, "I want to go with you..." Within minutes Austin and I were jumping in the truck heading to Rose Oaks to walk the trails.

Bored at home? Nope. I am LOVING this time with my family. We are watching movies together, playing games together, eating, cooking, cleaning and honestly just embracing this time together.
We still have our moments, but this time has really been sweet.
I could not ask for anything more than to have my family together.
Last year was so hard. Nothing will compare to that 10 MONTHS.
I am healthy. I am CANCER FREE. And I have my family.
I have nothing to complain about after only 23 days of quarantine.
I miss work, all my coworkers and my clients so much. Its just little while times.

What Park have you seen this lil guy at?

"Don't Believe Everything you Think" 
Just a reminder that you are what you think. You may have to be a little more intentional about your thoughts. But keep it clean.
Clean out the negativity upstairs.
Crash the Chatterbox.
Remove the things that draw you to negativity.
We are in hard times.
Be Kind.
Be Patient.
Suck it up Buttercup.
The only thing that is the end of the world it THE END OF the WORLD.
Oh yeah one more thing....
Get Over yourself!
I say this in Love...
ANITA~


BIG THANK YOU TO ANGIE W FOR MAKING ME THIS MASK....AND ANOTHER ONE TWO...SOOO SPECIAL!
AND THANK YOU TO TERRI W FOR GETTING THEM FOR ME.
I AM SO THANKFUL FOR ALL THE LOVE AND KINDNESS.

Monday, April 6, 2020

The Strength of OZ

"COURAGE! What makes a king out of a slave? COURAGE! What makes the flag on the mast to wave? COURAGE!" 
The Cowardly Lion, The Wizard of Oz


I have been very intrigued with the Wizard of OZ as of late. I love this 1939 classic.
I find it so interesting how all of the characters have a need. And their need causes them great pain and a feeling of being incomplete.

  • Dorothy wanted to go home. 
  • The Scarecrow wanted a Brain
  • The Cowardly Lion wanted Courage. 
  • The Tin Man wanted a Heart. 

And I just LOVE how all their desires they already possessed.

Illusions: Like in Oz we have all these illusions, often creating our own reality. The truth lied within them. Truth is not given as so much as it is recognized or realized through experiences. And often painful ones.

The Great Illusionist, Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkle Emmanuel Anbroise Diggs, better know as The Wizard of Oz.
The Man behind the curtain was quite brilliant at using trickery and to rule. When in reality he too had been stranded in Oz. "Hurting people hurt people."

"The Lord gives strength to His people, the Lord blesses His people with peace." Psalm 29:11

The word STRENGTH is translated from the Old Testament Hebrew word OZ!
OZ also translates "force, security, majesty, might and boldness."
The Wizard of Oz was all smoke and mirrors. He gave the illusion that he was all powerful, all mighty, strong and bold, when in reality he was quite the opposite.

Wow, this all seems so much like me. This little pipsqueak who struggles with a Napoleon complex wanting so bad to be stronger than I am.
Yesterday, Austin picked me up and literally spun me upside down and set me back down upright. I tightened every muscle I could and prayed my body wouldn't crumble.
"AUSTIN! Be careful, you will break your mom." Andy says.
"I'm fine!" I giggled. But the reality was I was scared he would break me. My body isn't what it used to be. I'm 46 years old, I'm no spring chicken and cancer didn't help my aging body.

Collision: I have peace that I am not what I used to be. But I also know that I am getting stronger in the season I am in.
Giving up because I get discouraged isn't an option.
The last few weeks, I have been able to slowly increase my mileage. I increase it by one mile every 2 weeks.
The first week, I take my time, running steady to build my endurance.
The second week, I run the same distance but try to beat my time.
Monday, March 30th: 15 miles@ 2h33min 10:14min/mi
Sunday, April 5th: 15 miles@ 2h26min 9:47min/mi
I am not trying to kill myself to beat my time, I am still adding walk breaks every mile and listening to my body. I do not want to go back to Egypt.
But it is giving me much needed confidence. I am getting stronger! I am increasing my miles and staying healthy.
Last week, I was able to run over 50 miles and biked 9 more miles. This is a lot of miles for me. It was because I didn't do my long run until this Monday for last week. I ended up with 2 long runs in 1 week.

I tried to think of what character I related to most.
The Wizard of OZ as you have read I related too with wanting to be stronger than I am.
Dorothy I wish I could go back to what I once was... Just being honest. This is a fleeting thought.
The Tin Man, I am asking to be a little softer. We are in some very hard days. This virus has many people judgement and abrasive. I don't want to be that person.
The Scarecrow wanted to have a brain, I have never been a brainy person. I don't have to be the master of knowledge. I am often corrected because I give off the illusion that I am an airhead. But I am not. Relationships are more important to me than proving I am right or that someone else it wrong.
The Cowardly Lion, probably my favorite. Courage. This is a gift God gave me many years ago.
The courage to not give up. The courage to be bold. When they told me I had cancer trust me when I tell you I shook with fear like the Cowardly Lion. Fear would grip me out of nowhere and tears would drown my cheeks.
It came down to one thing....
Strength.. The strength of Oz...


I really had fun putting this together. What character reflects you the most?
In closing, "We are not in Kansas anymore." Life as we know it has gotten a little kittywanbus.
Set yourself some daily goals and see if they take you "Somewhere over the rainbow"!

Anita~






Thursday, April 2, 2020

Even Though...

"Even though the fig trees have no blossoms,
    and there are no grapes on the vines;
even though the olive crop fails,
    and the fields lie empty and barren;
even though the flocks die in the fields,
    and the cattle barns are empty,
18 
yet I will rejoice in the Lord!
    I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!"
Habakkuk 3:17-18
I left a little sunshine on the trails today!

This passage was my devotional on Monday. I have been doing my devotional every day since the quarantine minus a day here or a day there but not many. I have NO EXCUSES. I can't say I am too busy or too tired or too anything because those are just too ridiculous when I am at home everyday. I need this quiet time, time to pause, time to "Be Still", time to connect with God in thoughts, prayers and comfort. Time to fence off the rest of the circumstances going on and isolate myself for a some quiet moments with God. 

When I read this passage it all seemed so familiar. It appeared as if it was written presently. 
I took the words and REWROTE them ….

"Even though this plague has swept across the land, 
and there is no vaccine or cure;
Even though the buildings are empty,
and many are without work;
Even though we are separated from those we love,
and we miss one another terribly,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord!"

And just like in Habakkuk this crisis is all encompassing. 
It really came as no great surprise when I heard the news that we were to be quarantined all through April. Yes, there are so many factors that have opportunity to overcast us with some dark clouds. 
I still saw Gods light in the darkness of crisis. 

It could be worse:
I will never forget those words almost one year ago. "..its just another marathon...." 
10 months of HELL. sick every week, sleepless, afraid, sad and bald. Oh, the emotions that go with being hairless, that's all together a very complex cocktail of emotions. Needles and shots multiple times a week, surgeries, sacrifices. 10 MONTHS...no appetite, body aches and a mouth of canker sores....
I guess that's why I am not rattled about 1 month of being quarantined. My finances were already a mess, I was barely back to work and I am off again. 
"..I will rejoice in the Lord..."
 Its all relative. I look back on my worst case scenario and it just doesn't compare. 
For that matter, I think about growing up in dysfunction junction and this still isn't close to that darkness. 
We are so used to getting what we want when we want it that some of you are really struggling. 
It could be worse. 
"And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing though some stages of instability." 
Habakkuk 3:2

"Slow Work"
"How long , Oh Lord, must I call for help?" Habakkuk 1:2
We are not going anywhere fast. Settle in. Find some joy, build a bridge and get over it. Things are not going to change.
You might be looking around and not seeing anything but doom and gloom. Well, God is working. Trust in the "Slow Work" of God. 
Choosing to be happy is a choice. I choose to find gratitude, I choose to look at things from a better perspective and with different understanding. 
Rather than praying for different circumstances, pray for a change of heart in the circumstances we cannot change. 
Settle in, Find Joy. Keep the Faith. Gratitude. 

Rundown: 
Look at that HAIR!!! WOOT WOOT!

Distance: 10 miles
Location: Holdridge, West Loop w/ Lake loop x2. 
SLOW WORK
This was my LONGEST trail run since January 12th. God is healing me in HIS time. It was up to me it would not be this way. But I see progress being made everyday. I could stomp my feet and whine about all my aches and pains or about not being as strong as I used to YET I REJOICE IN THE LORD... 

 
The bad news....I fell 3 times out there today....The good news...I got UP 3 times! 
And yet I Rejoice!
"What happens outwardly in your life is not as important as what happens inside you. Your circumstances are temporary, but your character will last forever." Rick Warren

Meet Taquito! I did today, He was so darn CUTE! 
And YES, I was 6 feet away. 

Your thoughts?

Anita~