As I pulled in, I knew I was busted. Claudia was there waiting with the rest of the girls to run. Claudia is very outspoken about walking, riding your bike or running to your destination when it is this close.
Laughing I got out of my car and confessed.
"OH NO...." Claudia is full of energy when she responds.
Everyone is laughing as she then says "Oh, and BTW, are we like your Reserve Runners?? Then all the girls pipe in with laughs about me running with them as my "Special Needs Runners."
This run started out high energy. We hadn't even started running and I was already out of breath.
We tried our best to follow the 5K trail. Somehow we got turned around and ran the same route a couple times. Probably all the joking. We burned more calories laughing and carrying on then we did running. We even took a few minutes to enjoy the "Look Out". It was beautiful.
It is funny the things that you let your mind entertain. Together, the 4 of us, otherwise strangers, come together for less than an hour to run. In that time, we share personal stories, embarrassing moments, crazy jokes and just all around fellowship. We are all from total different backgrounds. We each have areas in our life that make us who we are. But we just fully enjoy one another. Despite our differences, our circumstances, our personalities and our behaviors.
So my mind goes in the dark place. Where our minds shouldn't go.....
I then find my awesome run being taken from me by the thoughts that hurt me. I think of the corner of my brain that represents chaos. Dysfunction. "How did you find a way to navigate your mind to this disturbing place Anita"
My thoughts trail off to wanting to fit in. I then Remember that quote "Quit trying to FIT in when you were created to STAND OUT."
There are always going to be places that you want to be part of. There will always be people that you want to love you or accept you. My Sister In Law Deb Posted on Facebook Today, And Hit the Ball out of the Park!:
Why???? Why oh why do we, as human beings, focus of those that walk away and leave us? Why do question their ability to disappear from our lives? Why do we focus on the assumption that we must be broken or undesirable. When the truth is directly before you. You are SURROUNDED by those who have stayed. You are surrounded by those who love you soooo deeply they allow hurtful words. They allow time and distance to only strengthen their unconditional love for you.
Dear friend, ...kick the "deceiver" out of your head. Remove the scales he has blinded you with. Look up and see that you are worthy of love never ending. Those that have walked away brought meaning and fullness to your life; however, there are we that remain that call you worthy and lovely and precious. Don't push away the ones that have stayed and weathered your darkest storms w/ you.
Push!!!! Push w/ all your might. You will find that those who love you the most and have the most impact on your life will bear the force and reach to hold you close as you try to run away!
I Think That says it all!
I was encircled around some awesome women today. We all chose Each Other. We chose to spend our time together running, laughing, encouraging one another. I Love my Special Needs Runners. We all have special needs. Quit trying to get those who have walked away to be something they are not willing to be. Open your heart and eyes to all those that are around you that do love you with all your special needs!
Anita
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