"Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness...To humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart." Deut 8:2
I came out of the wilderness headed into the canyons. If I wasn't not humbled yet, I would be by the time the canyons were done with me.
By the time I reached Michigan Bluff (mile 55.7), my toe had begun throbbing again. I knew I needed to change my shoes and socks. After countless creek crossings, my feet had never fully dried, and the canyons had taken their toll.
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| 8:17pm |
I didn't know who would be waiting for me at Michigan Bluff but I felt sorry for whatever crew member it was. I was exhausted, filthy, emotionally drained and running on little more than determination. Just running on the prayers of others.
It was a little after 8:30 pm when I reached the station.
The aid station was roaring with cow bells and energy. Crew could not come within 200 feet of the aid stations.
Then I saw him.
Andy.
I was depleted of everything. I could not even muster tears. I tried to smile so he wouldn't be worried.
I just knew I didn't have to be strong anymore. I could be completely vulnerable because he knew me. He knows every look; he could read me from the moment our eyes connected.
And I could read him, and he looked so worried.
Empty of everything, and at a loss for words just seeing Andy brought peace I didn't know I needed.
There was another unexpected gift waiting for me....
At Western States, pacers aren't allowed to join until Forest Hill (mile 62), unless a runner reaches Michigan Bluff AFTER 8pm. Because I had arrived just after 8pm, Andy was allowed to pace me from there! It was not part of the original plan but in that moment, it felt like God's perfect timing.
I could also see the concern on his face. We both knew I was running dangerously close to the cutoff.
When I told him my feet needed attention, I caught a brief look of panic in his eyes.
Every minute mattered and I only had minutes.
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| 8:27pm |
One of the volunteers was part of the Blister Team. She gingerly removed my shoes and socks with Andy's help. They treated me like fine china, with incredible kindness, and gentleness.
I saw Andy feverishly watching the clock, trying not to hurry them, yet knowing we had very little time to spare.
I had to leave Michigan Bluff by 8:50 or get swept.
Yet with every minute I sat in the chair, I could feel my body coming back to life. The fog from the canyons slowly began to lift. My breathing settled and my spirit steadied.
Time was precious, but in that moment rest was priceless.
With fresh socks, clean bandages, and a renewed spirit, Andy and I thanked the blister team wholeheartedly and stepped onto the trail together.
The sun was setting in all glory across the mountains. And I had my best friend alongside of me. My heart was full now I just needed my body to cooperate.
Our destination was Forest Hill where I would meet Kara to trade places.
Forest Hill: 62 mile
Running with Andy
We only had 7 miles together. The truth was that my mind was exhausted. I couldn't carry a conversation, all I could do was embrace listening to his voice and the excitement and awe of him describing the mountains.
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| 8:50pm |
I WILL LET ANDY describe our miles together...
I was not originally planning on pacing at Michigan Bluff (56 miles), but as the day progressed, it became clear that she was going to come in after 8 pm which meant she could have a pacer earlier than Foresthill (100K mark). This presented a challenge since it was approximately a 1-mile hike and 300 ft of elevation from the road to the aid station. How could I crew her with supplies and pace her? After my 2nd hike down, I talked to the volunteers who offered me a chair and said I could leave my backpack of supplies at the aid station and come back later in the night/early morning to pick them up. So we had a plan and I began to anxiously wait… The 30-hour pace meant you had to leave by 8:50 pm. As 8:20 pm came and went my anxiety was at all-time high. I knew she was close and was climbing a huge climb…finally they called her name, and I knew it would be soon. She came in with somewhat of a smile and we briefly hugged as we made our way to the chair. She immediately asked that we tend to her feet. This caused even more anxiety as this was going to take some time that she simply did not have. The volunteers were absolutely incredible, and we all went to work on her feet. It became abundantly clear that her feet were in really bad condition. The blisters were abundant, some were broken up, others were angry and red. She ate as much as you could, but her stomach was not allowing many calories. After the much-needed feet attention, we were able to get up and moving. We started back out, leaving around 8:35 pm with 15 minutes to spare. As we began the climb out she was not in great spirits. Exhausted, stomach a mess and concerned about time. She would run 2 minutes or so at a time only to get back to the death march. We climbed for about 1 mile then had a 2 mile downhill. I tried to encourage her to jog the downhills, but they were too technical and she insisted on walking. The next 2 miles were about a 1,000 ft climb. It finally flattened out and we were able to jog into Foresthill to the sounds of cheers and cowbells. This encouraged her to start the next journey with Kara. I kept reminding her that this next section was the easiest and it was going to get better. On a side note… out of all the races she has done, this was easily the most worried I have ever been for her. She went dark early and I have never seen her so behind. The fact that she was able to finish this race still astounds me. I have never doubted her at a race (really-never), but I must admit after seeing her at Robinson Flat and then seeing her come late at Michigan Bluff, some doubts crept in.
Andy kept me moving, like prodding a horse. The elevation showed Andy a front row of my suffering. I was excited to see the girls when we came into Foresthill. I would pick up Kara. All I could think about was getting my trekking poles-that I soon discovered no one had. It was an instant gut punch.
Until once again Kara came to save me, "I have mine, you can use mine..."
I was elated. This was the first year they allowed poles, I do not use them normally, but the Lord humbled me. I was eating all the words I had ever said about running with "sissy sticks".
10:20 pm Kara and I headed into the trail. The cutoff time for this station was 11:45pm.
I cannot say that I remember much about the trail. I can say Kara was dancing on the trail. She was a free bird. Kara was in front leading me down towards the old gold mining trail. The next 3 aid stations we would be solo, no crew access. I was a walking zombie with a belly that was turning my pale skin green- I was wanting to puke. I had already taken Zophran and Dramamine. It had worn out and I needed something. I needed calories, caffeine and some anti-nausea.
Dardanelles 65.7
Peachstone70.7
Fords Bar 73
No Crew Access at all three.
Everything was a blur. going into aid stations and coming out of them. Kara had a mission, to get some calories in me. Being a ER doctor and an ultra-runner she knew that she had to get some calories in me. I would sip on black coffee, and chicken broth seemed the only thing I could keep down. Not too far after leaving the aid station I found myself hugging the wall of a mountain, the dark night hid me as I wretched all over myself. I cried to Kara as she worked so hard to get calories into me.
We came into an aid station, and I watched a guy tell his pacer he was going to take a 5-minute nap. I was so envious. I looked at Kara, "Can I have a 5-minute nap?" I waited as I watched her trying to do some calculations. She finally responded, "You can have 4 minutes..." I didn't waste anytime and climbed into the cot next to the guy. I know it seems crazy. But it works! That guy was taking 5-minute naps at every aid station. I was so grateful for just one. I cannot say I woke up footloose and fancy, but I woke up grateful and determined to show Kara I was better for it.
I will let Kara tell the story...
I picked Anita up at Foresthill Aid Station. She rolled in just after 10pm, and I had never seen her so exhausted-pale, confused, dehydrated, and unsteady on her feet. We reunited her with trekking poles while getting fluids into her to take whatever calories we could.
Then we were off.
It didn't take long before she decided she didn't want the poles. I strapped them to her pack, but that was a hard NO. We left them behind. I still had mine in my quiver, and onward we went.
The road to Foresthill was flat and paved, and we settled into an easy jog. Before long we were weaving through neighborhoods, making a few tricky turns before disappearing back into the darkness of the trail. The sky was ink black, the moon brilliantly bright, and dramatic clods drifted overhead. It was one of the nights that felt both impossibly beautiful and incredibly long.
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| 12:50am |
Ahead of us lay Dardanelles, Peachstone, Fords Bar, the infamous Rucky Chucky River crossing and finally the relentless 2-mile climb from the river up to green gate.
She had about a 45-50 minute cushion to make the cutoff. It wasn't much, but it was enough that I wasn't panicking. My job was simple: keep her awake, keep her moving, shuffle when we couldn't run, run when could, and somehow convince her to keep taking in calories. One step as a time. One aid station closer. One mile closer to Auburn. 
The one thing I distinctly remember is RUCKY CHUCKY...
I was so confused on these miles. But I was not confused on the fact that I was going to have to do this river crossing at mile 78.
The river would be above my waist.
The river would be roughly about the same temp at the air, about 57 degrees.
Everyone said it would be "refreshing"
The thought of crossing the river had been weighing on me for miles. But I also has been anxiously awaiting to reach this monumental point. I knew it would revive me. Fear will do that to you.
The Aid Station lit up the dark night. But beyond the lights the river disappeared into the night. Just the reflections danced off the ripples. I could hear it; it was moving faster than I was.
As we approached a volunteer looked at me and asked, " do you want a life jacket? "
Kara quickly responded "No".
Without hesitation, I answered, "Yes."
Then they asked us what order we wanted to cross. I had Kara go first. This would keep me moving and giving me more confidence.
The moment we stepped into the river, the cold stole my breath. Volunteers stood in the river, stationed along a thick rope stretched across the current. They had us wearing glow necklaces along with them. They also had them in the river water to help direct you where to land your feet from one boulder to another.
With every step, the water grew deeper. Every volunteer encouraged us as we made our way across.
Every step took my breath away.
Near the middle of Rucky Chucky one of the volunteers calmly looks at me and said, "You're coming to a big drop. The water is going to be up to your shoulders."
Panic surged me.
Up until that point I had been carefully stepping from one large rock to another. But hearing those words changed everything. I stopping trusting my legs. I changed the plan with all fear. I gripped the rope with both hands and pulled myself across, hand over hand, letting my upper body do all the work while the current pushed against me.
By the time I caught up with Kara, my whole body was trembling uncontrollably.
But we were not done.
We still had to scramble over slick rocks and in the dark I had no idea we were not done with Rucky Chucky.
Kara led the way to another rope in a sandy bank anchored straight UP. Dripping wet and cold we grabbed hold and literally pulled ourselves up and climbed our way out of the river gorge.
When we reached the top, we were filthy and shivering...
I found humor in the bucket of cold dirty water they gave you to wash off. Oh, the irony.
But we were not done.....
THE RUNDOWN
THE Canyons...
The Canyons brought more than extreme elevation. It brought extreme emotions. The climbs along those canyon walls left my so exposed. It exposed my weaknesses. It exposed my mistakes and exposed my vulnerabilities.
The climbs revealed God's strength in my weakness. I had no tools, no poles, all I had was my Faith. It was Faith that the Lord would provide for me everything I was not equipped with.
I had nothing by FAITH.
The canyons emptied me of everything I thought I needed, my strength, certainty, control.
But it never took my Hope.
I just needed to get to Green Gate, Kara and I had another 2 grueling miles to go.
In Peace, Not Pieces
Anita
