Don't Judge Me!

If we judge others, it is because we are judging something in ourselves of which we are unaware.

John A. Sandford

 

 

 

Whether I am on the treadmill or I am stretching out my legs there are people all around me. We watch one another and we check each other out.

I have been on the treadmill running my heart out only to discover the person next to me is leaning my way checking out my digits. I can feel myself getting insecure wondering what they are thinking.

I too have checked out that person and hear myself saying things like:

"Get your arms up, pull your shoulders back..."

Last week there was a woman on the treadmill who was doing some sort of interval training. She would pick her pace up so fast that the treadmill started clunking and clanking. I saw her out of the corner of my eyes looking like she was drowning only she was not swimming. I couldn't help but look it her. She grabbed the handrail without slowing down and her legs were almost 2 feet behind her body. I seriously was concerned she was going to fly off. I thought "Oh Gosh, just slow down a spell, your going to fly off and end up in the weight area."
Was this judgmental?

Or even today. A young woman got on a treadmill in front of me. It was hardly even 8am and she looked like a rock star. Her blond hair was hanging perfectly past her shoulders and her make up looked like something out of a CoverGirl ad. Trying not to judge her I gave her secret compliments.  But her pants! I couldn't help but wince in pain for her. They were so tight they went all the way up her..Crack. OUCH. ...Was this judging??

About that time I thought of myself. I could see my reflection in the tv screen attached to my TM. I looked underweight and gaunt. My skin is the palest it has ever been and I broke out with red pimples in the middle of my 40 year old wrinkles. My hair was sticking up about 3 inches in the air like a peacock. I was something to look at myself. Are we allowed to judge ourselves?

 

"DON'T JUDGE ME"

This is one of the biggest over used statement I know of.

Yesterday I heard this statement 3 TIMES.
I was at lunch with "Katie". She was telling a story and used it with a giggle and a smile.

I think it is trending in the context she used it in.

I have heard it jokingly as of late.  But every so often it is used in seriousness.

 

I have noticed that often times when people use this statement they are judging the person they are accusing of judging THEM.

 

People get ACCOUNTABLITY and JUDGMENT mixed up. We don't like to be held accountable anymore. We want to do what we want to do without explaining ourselves to anyone.

EVERYTHING we do affects someone else.

 

The reality is we ALL judge one another when it really comes down to it.

It is the manner we do it in that hurts people.

 

When I wanted to qualify for Boston, Andy pulled me aside and told me some of the things I was doing wrong. He shared with me some things I needed to incorporate be better. It was hard to hear coming from someone that was not running a lot. But I knew he loved me and wanted to see me successful.

WHAT I DIDNT DO:

• I didn't get a chip on my shoulder.
• I didn't make excuses.
• I didn't blame shift it.
• He was right. It was something I needed to work on.

Someone I love dearly shared some very deep issues she was dealing with. She knows that I don't agree with the choices she is making, however, she knows I love her. She knows I am not going to agree with her but I do not judge her. She loves me enough to know that I love her enough to communicate to her in Love.

 

I have to look at myself in the mirror every day. Everyday I have the opportunity to be a better person than I was yesterday.
But like running, being the best person I can be is full of set backs, heartache, confusion and WORK. Being better means there are things I am going to have to sacrifice and give up (like brownie brittle)!

It also means I accept that I am NOT perfect and He is NOT finished with me yet. Some days I really fall short. As I look at my imperfections I do not look at them as an end all. I just pick myself back up and try again.

I appreciate that person in my life that has the courage to hold me accountable. I know that they love me and want to see the best in me.

 I don't want a friend in my life that is going tell me what I WANT to hear. I need a Friend in my life that is going to tell me what I need to hear.

 

THROWBACK THURSDAY!!

 

One of Andys first races! 2009

 

RUNDOWN:

Distance: 10 miles

Pace: 7:41

Time:1:17

This run HURT. I was still sore from yesterday. I had moments of numbness but then the fatigue and soreness came back. I was so numb the last mile I shocked myself and finished it at a 7:10 pace. Happy Happy Happy!

 

 

Have you ever been called Judgmental? How did that make you feel? Have you ever said to someone "Don't Judge me"?  What made you think they were judging you?

 

Anita

 

 

From Paczkis to Pain

Stupid, Stupid Paczki's .
I came home last night at 9pm to discover the blueberry filled paczki calling my name on the table. I didn't think I wanted it I convinced myself as I walked back to the bedroom. "Well, maybe just a bite." I told myself. Then I tip toed back to the kitchen for another bite. Then another little bite. And another. After more than half of the jelly filled pastry was bitten away I gave up on being cute about it. I grabbed the last few bites in my hand and headed to the bedroom. Andy looked at me and in defeat and powdered sugar I just laughed.

My first thought this morning was PACKZI.
Oh, todays run was going to hurt. I may have enjoyed those 1000 calories last night but I was going to make myself pay for it today.
It reminded me of when a school team doesn't do good and the coach makes them run suicides.
I slacked off eating that little piece deceit and now I had to coach myself into the hurt locker.

1 Mile LADDER Run:
I headed to the track and decided to do a ladder drill.

Ladder Work Out

1 mile warm up

2x400m repeats w/400m c/d  in between

1x800m repeat w/ 800m easy jog

1x1600m w/ 1600 easy jog

1x800m repeat w/ 800m easy jog

1x400 repeats w/400m c/d in between 

1 mile cool down

8 miles total

Tie a knot and hang on!

I prayed for God to give me strength to endure the pain I knew I was going to invite.

WE ALL have our hard days. My hard day might be your easy day and vise versa. It is the enduring that really kicks your teeth in. I could see the finish of my repeats and tried desperately to hang on as I came around that curve on the track. I was frantically looking for the digits on the track to keel over in agony.

I envisioned me "HOLDING ON". I spoke to myself to just "HOLD IT, Hold IT NITA." And after about the second or third repeat I saw another vision. It was God's hand reaching out to me to grab. I didn't need a knot to grab a hold of I need his hand to reach for because I knew HE wouldn't let me go.

The vision was powerful. It gave birth to strength and stamina that I didn't think I was capable of. I shocked myself as I looked down at my watch with each passing repeat.

There is POWER in WORDS and VISIONS. You have to reach out there and say it. Then you have to Believe it. As for me I Seek God to give me what I do not believe I have on my own.

 

If you do not see Victory how are you ever going to achieve it?

Victory and Success does not come from the UPS Man. It is achieved with a little sweat and heart ache.

Tears streamed down my face as I begged my body not to fail me. The air was blowing through my hair cooling the beads of sweat off my brows. I could tell my face was distorted, a far cry from the cool collected look of Ryan Hall or Kara Goucher.

But nothing mattered at those moments but getting through the pain.

 

Victory comes THROUGH pain. Most of us stop at Pain. It hurts to feel it. We have learned how to mask it, hide from it, avoid it and numb it. But rarely do we learn how to go through it.

I challenge you to go through it. See what is on the other side of Pain.

Pain does not have to be a road block. It can bring success on many different levels both physically and interpersonally.

Rolling my ITband with the Trigger Point roller.

 

RUNDOWN:

Distance: 8 miles

Ladder Work out

Abs..Extra Paczki Abs.

-Stretch, Roll and Cold plunge for 12 minutes.

• I was so thirsty after finishing my run I grabbed my water and took a BIG swig of it. It was ice cold and refreshing...ONLY IT WASNT MINE! My water was lukewarm and sustaining. Trying not to look so obvious that I just downed someone else's water I quickly headed upstairs. It was like clockwork. Like my body was instantly rejecting the ameba's that were in the water. I  lunged forward in a sneezing fit. 1,2,3,4,5, I continued sneezing as I made it to the upstairs gym. With spit flying out of my mouth I quickly grabbed a towel to continue to sneeze into. I was convulsing as the sneezing continued. 12,13,14 I seriously lost track. I barely caught my breath when another sneeze followed suit. I was thankful I didn't pee my pants that would have just added injury to insult.

 

Have you ever grabbed something at the gym that wasn't yours?

 

Anita

 

 



The 3 C's of Life and Oranges.

Tuesdays may be an off day for me when it comes to running but it is NOT a rest day. Tuesdays are my busiest day of the week.
After working all day I had to run to the school for a Cross Country meeting and then run back to school for one more client.
Tuesday nights I facilitate a support group meeting. It is designed to support those who have loved ones struggling with addiction.
It pains me to see so many struggling with addiction. Those of us that have loved one are as sick as our loved ones addicted.
I spoke to a group earlier this week and discovered more than 75% of those that I spoke to have someone very close to them addicted.
I was speaking to a group of mothers. The topic I was asked to speak on was addiction.

We as a society have become so desensitized by addiction that we have accepted it as normal. All the chaos that it breeds we have just accepted. Most of us just laugh it off, ignore it or poke fun at it.
Well it is killing not just people but families.
It is tearing children from their parents, breaking marriages up, confusing families and like cancer affecting everyone involved.

It pains me to see  addiction poo poo-ed. It pains me even more to see tears shed week after week over the hostages of addiction.
Mothers, friends, wives, fathers confused and full of loss. As this world moves forward breeding more addiction and down playing it as normal.

IT is NOT Normal.

Eating oranges and trying to recover from the brokenness.
Anita

The Clock keeps Ticking-7 weeks out

Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.
Laertius Diogenes

 

Tick Tock, tick tock the Clock is ticking. Less than 7 weeks away for Boston. That is only 6 weeks left of training. My stomach turns inside out when I think about it.

I have one 20 miler down!

In the next 7 weeks this is what I would like to happen:

1. New Shoes
2. 1 more 20 miler
3. 2-22 milers
4. Buy my Boston Running outfit.
5. Wrap up traveling arrangements
6. Start my Prayer Chain
7. Download music for my ipod (Not that I will use it!)
8. Schedule Massage
9. RELAX
10. Get my family excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am asking people to pray for me. I need prayer to stay healthy.

This years Boston Marathon is going to be a run of redemption. Last years marathon devastated both runners and non runners alike.

 

My life has been forever altered from it. I am a fighter. And there are many others out there like me. This year I am not going to bow out in fear or defeat. I am going to stand tall, as tall as my 5'2 self is anyway.

I have trained this year through the worst winter I have ever trained in.

I BELEIVE God is just training my mind to be more than a conqueror. I know He wants me to rely on HIM.

I go to bed sore and wake up in the middle of the night with cramps and body soreness.

I will Run Through it.

When I want to quit or give up I remind myself I am Boston Strong.
When I feel beaten up and mentally crushed I try to get back up and go one more round.

I am not a quitter.

And with CHRIST all things are Possible.

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RUNDOWN:

RUN 1: Husky Road Runners

Distance: 3.9 miles

Intervals: 3:1

RUN 2: GAC

Distance: 6.10

Treadmill first 4 miles.

I saw Jeff running on the track. He looked like H*@@. So I jumped on the track to check on him. Jeff was running his long run and was toast. I ran 2 miles with poor old Jeff to encourage him and take his mind off going in a million circles. I  was really sore and didn't want to run. However, when Jeff thanked me it was a good feeling. He said he was really having a hard time out there this morning.
 

 *I find it funny how sometimes you cant pull it out for yourself but you can get it together for someone else!

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PUMPKIN Bread Recipe:

3 eggs

2 1/2 c. sugar

1 c. oil

3 tsp. vanilla

2 c. cooked pumpkin

1 c. nuts if desired

3 c. flour

1tsp. soda

1/2 tsp. baking powder

1tsp salt

3 tsp. cinnamon

(I add raisins, flax seed and wheat germ to mine)

Mix toether, then divide into 3 greased and floured bread pans. Bake at 350' for 1 hour. Eat like bread or use as pudding with whipped cream.

 

I have been making this for years. It is a favorite!

 

 

ANITA

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Consistency. Mother Nature hates me.

It is like clockwork. It is Sunday, I wake up, I look outside and I want to start crying.
I am about to snap. Mother Nature is beating the snot out of my training. This is a cruel game that I feel like I am losing.
If we are not getting blasted with ridiculous amounts of snow then we are suckered punched with sub zero temps.

HOW MUCH MORE CAN WE TAKE???

I pouted as we headed to church. I felt very ungodly as I whined and complained about the weather all morning.

AND yet I get to church to listen to a sermon on STAYING FOCUSED!
Seriously. It was speaking right to me. I know many of you are thinking "Really, a Sermon for you about your RUNINNG..."

OK fine. The sermon was about staying focused in your walk with Christ. And I believe the A.D.D in me needed to hear that message. I am so easily distracted that I admit I took notes. It was a great sermon to remind me to continue to persevere and stay consistent.

I also know that my running needed the application as well.

I was feeling very discouraged this morning. Discouragement leads to depression. Depression leads to isolation. Isolation leads to a dead end. Period.
God refueled my empty tank this morning.

I turned the frown upside down and headed to the gym.
20 miles on the TREADMILL. My all time record.
 

Austin secretly took a pic of me running! He actually walked in front of me like 5 times he said and I never saw him!

Just one mile at a time. Sometimes I tried to make it to the next commercial break. There were times I would look at the clock 10 times and only 5 minutes had passed. I thought I would never get to 5 miles let alone 20. People came and went on the treadmills. I got several looks from people that illustrated "you are still here?!"
It was not easy. I pray I do not have to run on the treadmill that long again for the rest of the year.

On a GOOD note, here are the things that made me thankful for being able to run on the Dreadmill:

1. Thankful I didn't have to wear all those layers. More aerodynamic with less layers!
2. All layers means another load of Laundry! 20 miles outside is SMELLY.
3. Thankful I didn't have to locate a route with all the snow not cleared.
4. Thankful I maintained a good pace as opposed to running all cut up outside.
5. Thankful for the Stretching bars, cold plunge, sauna and hot showers after my run.

RUNDOWN:
Distance: 20 miles
Pace: 8:46
Time 2H:55min

It is important to stay FOCUSED. You do not have to be A.D.D. to be easily distracted. It is like the DOG that sees the Squirrel. "Squirrel!!" and he is off and running. Often times we are easily distracted simply because we are NOT focused on the task or the goal. We look for a rabbit hole to duck into and then justify WHY we did not follow through.

Stay Focused and find Gratitude to change your Attitude!

Where You on TASK today?

Where did you LOOSE your focus??

Check OUT my NEW Facebook Page and  "LIKE" it. Running Against the odds.
Also Follow me now on Twitter at Anita @ Runanitarun.



Anita



Find Your Strong..



"I am Strong" I told myself at mile 7 on the Treadmill.

• "I can do this" I told myself as I increased my pace.
• "I will not give up" I recited over and over again.
• "No, not 9 miles, 10 miles Anita, 10 miles" I needed to stay committed.
• "You Got this" I laughed at how good I felt.

Listening to your inner coach. There is always a place where we coach what we are capable of. We KNOW what we can do, should do, or are capable of doing.
But somewhere in there our thoughts are interrupted.
We change our goals, we alter our focus, we manipulate our words and we argue within ourselves.

WHY???

As soon as we get a little uncomfortable we start to negotiate the original plan.
Maybe it hurts to much.
Maybe it is a little inconvenient.
Maybe we just don't "Feel' like it.
MAYBE_____________________________________________.

As easy as we coach ourselves into doing something extraordinary we find ourselves coaching ourselves right back out of it!

This is LIFE!
Running is extraordinary in my opinion.
I can not get everyone out there running but there are many many other things that you can do that are extraordinary.

Life is full of these coaching moments. We have good intentions. We have great ideas. We have vision to do something great.

So where do we go wrong?

• "I will do it tomorrow."
• "No one really cares"
• "It is too cold outside, I am going to stay in."
• "I just don't have the time."
• "They wouldn't do it for me."
• "They don't deserve it"
• "I don't know how to do it."

EXCUSES..EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES

Do something GREAT. Doing something great does not always feel so good. The victory comes at the end. And sometimes you never even see the fruit of doing something great. But in your heart of hearts you know...
It is a little flame in your heart that burns. It is the smirk or the twinkle in your eye that gives you affirmation that you did something extraordinary.
It is peace in the middle of chaos.
It is contentment when you feel tugged in different directions.

 I AM STRONG.

• Strength is powerful. It is birthed in the mind first.
• Strength is doing the right thing.
• Strength is fighting the inner demons.
• Strength is being humble enough to seek others..
• Strength is Trusting God and seeking Him.
• Strength is not always winning but being strong enough to let someone else.

"Find Your Strong" Saucony

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I have tried some new things:

 

1. Follow me on my FACEBOOK Page  "Running Against the Odds"
2. I joined TWITTER! I have NO idea what I am doing but I am doing it!  Follow me on Twitter on Anita @runanitarun

RUNDOWN:

Distance: 10 miles

Pace: 7:43

Time: 1:18

 

ANITA

 



Sport Kilt Winner...

DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!!

AND THE WINNER OF THE SPORT KILT IS........

"DANIELLE"

DANIELLE WON WITH 47 POINTS!
Runner UP: Carrie with 27points
and Sonja would only did shares with 20 points!

Could I get ALL your addresses Please.
Email me: nitagirl@comcast.net


Thank YOU. I want to give runners up a constalation prize for being so loyal and taking the time to follow my blog and share with others~

Anita