"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and siters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." James 1:2-3
Spring was in the air this morning. The sky was a endless blue as we headed out to the frozen trails at Island Lake.
As we ran down the connector trails to the BLUE loop the path was etched with a history of imprints. Bikers, runners, hikers, dogs and tracks of wildlife.
That ice crusted section was not pleasant and thankfully only lasted less than a mile. Once we entered the trail it was smoother. I would like to say more runnable, but it wasn't long before I tripped over something hidden under the leaves. A brisk reminder who was really in charge.
Respect the trail.
Some miles were conversational miles.
Some miles were silenced miles.
But even in the silence, the woods were never that quiet or still.
Three deer startled, I am convinced by my loudmouth, crashed through the brush in front of us.
Squirrels rustled in the leaves.
Woodpeckers tapped about; birds called out.
I even thought I saw an eagle, I always think I see an eagle, but I was still excited to see a pair of red-tail hawks gliding through the trees.
The woods were not quiet, they were waking up!
BUT what I heard most, was my own body.
My breathing.
My thoughts.
"Difficulties strengthen the mind as labor does the body." Seneca
My body was still sore from another week of high mileage. But mostly from tubing and horseback riding like a twelve-year-old over the weekend.
A body that I was carefully trying to navigate over roots, rocks, bridges, and hills, I was feeling every step.
My thoughts were going back to the soreness of my body and my HEART. In just a few weeks, we lost another young adult from our youth group from another overdose. It triggered so many memories. We ran through a trailer park to get to the trail. I was mostly silent, but my thoughts were so loud.
Grief. deepest grief. This portion of our run was like running through time. Old trailers, side by side, broken down cars in the streets, half done projects pieced together with the best intentions. These thoughts colliding with the loss of two beautiful girls, and a beautiful mother, my mother.
The silence was deafening as the brokenness of addiction screamed in my heart.
I didn't care for this portion of the run. Even though the path was smooth, the obstacles of the heart were hard.
CHANGE is never EASY. But the only way through is through.
The Trouble with TRAILS.
Even though I LOVE the trail, the trail does not always love me back. (A free commercial about relationships and life)
Maybe that is why I keep returning. Because it is hard. because it demands something of me.
The trails are relentless.
Sometimes unforgiving.
It trips you up.
And it sometimes leaves you lost.
Because within its struggle, the grit of getting through, the suffering of endless obstacles, there is a beauty that is so fulfilling.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and siters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." James 1:2-3
THE RUNDOWN
"The best way out is always through." Robert Frost
DISTANCE: 68 miles
ELEVATION:3.300
WEEKS TO GO: 12 weeks until my 100 miler, Sulphur Springs.
The TRAIL, like LIFE, is filled with obstacles, challenges and things that will trip you up. It will challenge you and sometimes it will leave you lost.
Life can leave you lost. But it challenges you to find your footing again. And yet in faith, in chaos there is peace.
Because life was never meant to be easy.
Relationships were never meant to be effortless.
Silence is really never truly silent.
Even in the noise, there is PEACE.
And when you fall, you get back up.
Today, I took some time to grieve. I found myself tearful with my niece, unaware of how sensitive the loss of these two gals had left me today.
Like running the trails, I allowed my heart to feel throughout the day. I let myself grieve and gave way to the hurt my heart was encompassed with.
In Peace, not Pieces,
Anita
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