Coaching Power Words

"Anita, you would be better off if I was dead."
"People don't know the REAL you, like I do."
"You don't have to Love me but you Had better Damn well Respect ME!"
"You Don't LOVE ME, You only LOVE YOURSELF."
"I am just going to kill myself, all you want is my money."

Proverbs 18:21
"The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."

These words haunt me over 20 years later. I can recall more words that my mother spoke into me with hurt than love.
There is no doubt that my mother loved me. I know this. Often hurting words come from a wounded heart. Matthew 12:34; Luke 6:45"…out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks."

WORDS HURT. They are like daggers cutting straight to the flesh. They are like venom that poisons your heart and mind.
They say it takes 7 good things to trump 1 bad thing said to you.

I heard words at such a young age that would handicap me for life.

You don't just "GET OVER IT."
They are too painful to forget and  painful to remember.
The words leave scars that you try to cover up all your life.
They leave you with thoughts of

• Being unloved
• Being unworthy
• Being discarded
• Being disgraced

I could go on and on. I sat there amongst several adults this past Tuesday. This is Addiction Night, many were that had been broken from hurtful words. Words that they said or words that were said to them. Every Tuesday night I facilitate a group that have loved ones struggling with drugs, alcohol or other co-dependency issues.

The tears of empathy stream down my face as the gentleman describes the toxic words his 75 year old mother still spews at him.

I don't talk about it much. But I think about them often.

As runners we learn the Power Of Words. We learn that just a few words of negativity can sabotage a run before we get out the door. Running starts in our heads way before we lace up our shoes. Some of us never even get to lace up our shoes because the words were entertained too much.

Running Power Words:

1. Persevere
2. Believe
3. Strength
4. Faith
5. Endure
6. Victory
7. Guts/Grit
8. Persistence
9. Dedication
10. Persistence

Most runners I know are the most encouraging, edifying and motivational people I know. We learn the Power of Words. We speak to ourselves all day long. We coach ourselves with words. Words to get us out the door. Words to get us moving and keep us moving. Words to conquer defeat, words to destroy discouragement and words to lead us to victory.

I laced up my Hoka's and headed out the door to try and do 3 easy miles. Mile 2 was my best mile. I felt whole. As I approached my 3 I had a minor twinge. I was grateful that I was only a couple houses from home. No running for me for a couple days. I will see how I feel come Sunday. Thank You for the continued prayers. I feel so needy asking for them. I am very grateful for those who have been praying for me.

1 Thessalonians 5:11
“So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”

My Challenge to you is to use those same words that as runners you are coaching yourself with, to coach someone else.
Speak the very words of life, love and encouragement into a loved one.


"Words have power. They work. That's why poetry can affect people. That's why music and lyrics and songs affect people, and that's why chants and prayers and affirmations and all those various things affect the frame of mind." Sammy Hagar

  Do you have words that have haunted you? Are you a good encourager, coaching  into others?

Afraid to RUN

For years now I have done nothing but look forward to running. I plan the run, the route, the clothing, I check the weather and find myself itching to lace up my shoes.
It makes my day before I even get out of bed.

Having a injury where you can not run or are uncomfortable to run disturbs almost every fiber of your being.
I am off balance in every way.
I am way more emotional.
I think far to much, overthinking things that I would otherwise "Let Go and Let God".
I lost my routine.
I lost part of my identity.
I have lost part of my joy.
I have lost my running companions.

I thought the best way to heal my injury would be to take a 2 week hiatus from running.

Not running does not mean sitting on the couch with a bag of Chicago style pop corn..
I run so I can sit on the couch and eat that.

It means we find a new routine:

• I have done more biking in the last week than I have done in the last 5 years.
• I have continued to go to the gym to do alternative cardio and exercises.  
• Icing for NO LESS than 15 minutes with every work out.
• Doubling up on my Juice Plus and Juice Plus complete for healing.
• Healthier options for bed time munchies.
• Doubled up on my prayers

I have really tried to have all my bases covered.

Today, I met with Clint V for physical therapy.

"I took 2 weeks off from running..."
Clint just stares at you before he speaks. This makes me nervous for what he is going to say.
"Well, I would run and see how it feels." He casually says.
I thought I would get personal with my response, " So would YOU run?'
Without hesitation he replied "Yes, I would run and if it hurts stop."

Leaving the office I suddenly got scared. In my car ride back home my hands were sweaty on the steering wheel.

• What if the pain shows up?
• What if I can't run?

Each of those thoughts had a dozens sideways thoughts attached to it. My head was spinning. I was scared to death to see how my body responded to running.

I headed to the gym. The plan was to try and do 3 miles. I would run on the track. I wanted the feeling of running free. Not confined to the treadmill. I wanted to feel the air brush pass my skin. my hair to flow behind me. I wanted to see my body propel forward.
"Please God...." I prayed.

I was having cold feet.

I took off like a bat out of hell.
It didn't take 10 feet before I felt my knee aching.
It wasn't my IT band though. I kept running. The pain was more on my knee cap.
1 mile down. My chest was heavy. There is nothing like RUNNING. The hair on my arms stood up as my body moved forward. Slowly the pain in my knee was gone. I waited for my It band to flare up. Waiting waiting waiting..
My lungs were burning.
My left foot was even beginning to nag me.
But I kept going. It was so invigorating. I wanted to go faster. I wanted to go harder.
1, 2 3 miles... I DID IT. NO, IT Band pain.

I am still a little skeptical. Is it too good to be true?
As for the knee pain. I believe it is a result from countless lunges and squats over the last 2 weeks.

I am not sure. But I am grateful.
Thursdays are usually run days for me. I am going to try again tomorrow. I will go a lot slower. I may even add some walk breaks in there to be smart.


I don't want to get stuck on stupid. Running fast, running long and running hills are the 3 worst things you can to do when recovering from an IT band injury.
I am my worst enemy. Injury will humble you. But staying humble takes work.

Anita

I like to Move it, Move it

A Body in Motion Stays in Motion. A Body in Rest Stays in Rest."

 

As tired as I was last night, I managed to gather my things and head to the gym.

It was a busy day. I had a family shower to go to in the middle of the day.

By the time I arrived at home it was already after 6pm.

 

One part of me wanted to put on a pair of flannel pj's and a tee shirt, while the other part was trying to beat that thought out of my head.

Within minutes I was up to the gym.

 

This morning the weather looked grey with rain ready to come through the clouds. I decided to go to the gym and play it safe.

 

I LOVE walking into my gym. I haven't the faintest idea how to use half of the equipment but what I do know how to use is plenty to get me excited.

 

I headed towards the track. Not to run. The gym has a smaller gym above the track that I like to go to.

Even though I like people, I like to work out away from people.  

 

1 hour of cardio. That was my plan. I wanted to see how my knee felt with one hour of cardio outside of riding my bike. I did this elliptical stair climber thing.

NCIS just started on the screen attached to my machine. PERFECT. I laughed at the thought of watching my Maw Maw's favorite show. Murder mysteries are my favorite. If Angela Lansbury came on with Murder She Wrote I would have gone another hour!

 

Results:

I got a good sweat going!

No knee pain!

Legs felt like JELLO when finished!

I would say it was a successful work out.

15 minutes in the Cold Plunge to top it off. The Cherry on Top!

(I will do my other exercises later)

 

You have to keep moving. Stay active. I am not saying that you have to run a marathon, I am not saying that you should even be a runner. I am just saying that we are all getting older and it is better to be sore from being active than to be sore from falling apart!

 

If you struggle getting motivated find something that Inspires you.

Find someone that inspires you. Maybe there is a blog, or a Facebook page that you have that helps motivate you off the couch.

Maybe you need a partner. Have the courage to ask someone, you may be surprised to find out they really wanted the motivation too.

I am motivated my people. I love to hear stories.

Andy asked me if I had been following this guy story on our Facebook. Matt A. had been posting his experience on a team supporting a runner doing Badwater.

As I looked at the pictures I was very inspired. The pictures were surreal.  As I creeped his wall I just wanted to RUN.

I wanted to run in the mountains. I wanted to run in the heat. I wanted to run until I couldn't go any farther.

Nothing wrong with Dreamin!

 

Find what gets you moving. Find your inspiration. Then wipe your perspiration.

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Chicken Salad

 

• 2 cans Chicken (I prefer whole chicken, using breast meat)
• 1 cup halved purple grapes
• 1/4 cup red onion
• 1/2 cup golden raisins
• 1/2 cup celery
• 1/2 cup Miracle whip
• 1/4 teaspoon dill

Salt and pepper to taste.

Add sliced almonds if you like

MIX together and sever on croissants

Pita or Lawash is a healthier option.

 

 

Anita

 

 

 

 

Perspective;

There is something so inviting about clear skies and warm air.
I really switched my routine up this morning. I didn't have time to bike; however, I did have time to take Sheba for a 2 mile walk.
I had a lot of noise in my head that I need to muffle. There is something to be said about going for a walk to clear your head.

I would like to say that my walk did the trick. The voices slowly began to surface.

I found myself on a 12 mile bike ride a few hours later.

I had a couple euphonies.

Perspective:
A lot of my sadness is circulated around not being able to run.
Not being able to run makes me more hypersensitive to issues I would normally let roll off me. These issues now feel like nails on a chalk board.
So I needed to dissect my running  as a whole.
I took my focus off not being able to run and redirected it towards what I have to be grateful for.
After all, it is ONLY running that I can not do.

"What is bothering you about not being able to RUN?" I asked myself. This is what I came up with:

• I have already registered for the Detroit Marathon. What if I can not run it?
• The Crim is right around the corner. This is my FAVORITE RACE ever. My baby. This is a family event we all go to. The thought breaks my heart. Austin is running it. Andy is running it. I am not??

I came up with those 2  reasons that I am mostly crushed upon.
I then came up with one of my most popular sayings "The Only Thing that is The End Of The World: IS The End Of The World."

I could slowly begin to breath. "Ok Anita, You are going to be Ok."

I can BIKE.
I can Work Out.
I have my Health.
I have my Family.
And I have Father God, who Loves me more than anything. Who carries me, Who listens to me, Who believes in me.
I am Going to Be OK.

I found that I was not just grieving Running, I was grieving my favorite races and the tradition of running them.

It is gonna be Ok. I will do the best I can do. I will remain positive and optimistic and just wait on God to heal me and direct me.

BUT..Know this. I will bike my little heart out. I will stretch my body like Gumby. I will roll, I will ICE and I will do my exercises with all my heart, mind and soul.
I will not back down.
I will not give anything less that everything I have.
I will not go down without a FIGHT.

And the Worst Case Scenario: I don't run my races.
My Best Case Scenario: I am a stronger person for not giving up.

I Challenge YOU to do the Same.
Don't GIVE Up. Fight with everything you have.
Fight in FEAR, Fight in FAITH.
But Don't Give up.
If you are not out of breath from trying, Try Harder.

A little Piece of ME:
I had a little conversation with my sister today about memories. Sad to say we do not have many great memories. Even sadder my sister hardly remembers much of anything. Probably because she locked herself in the closet for most of her teenage life! Seriously.
So as a child I begged God to get me to the next day. I wish I could grab a hold of some more memories.
Then today, my son Alec hides himself under the covers because he struggled with memories as well. Andy discovered some pictures on the PS3. Alec broke down as he headed to the bedroom to hide his emotions. 
I made a choice a long time ago. I was going to be the best mother I could possibly be. Now, I have failed many times. But my children will without a doubt be able to tell you that their mother loves them and would go to hell and back for them.

Alec struggles different than we struggled as kids, my sister and I.
We wanted to grow up. We wanted to get through. The memories we have haunt us and hurt us. We have a difficult time finding memories because we spent so much time not wanting to remember.

Alec doesn't want to grow up. He can not look at pictures and it hurts him to reminisce. He wants to live with us forever. He is very sensitive to growing up independently. Memories make him sad because they mean so much to him.

I thought it was interesting how God showed me both these illustrations of my sister hiding away and Alec also hiding away. God can use all of it. He is doing a work in you no matter where you hide. And no matter where you hide, He always knows where you are.

Anita

Strung with Love

Some days are just not THE Day.
Today was NOT the Day that I ran.
Today was NOT the Day that I biked.
Today was NOT the Day that I made it to the GYM.
It was just NOT the Day.

Today, was the day TO go on a field trip to the Zoo in Birch Run and Frankenmuth.
Today, was the day to spend the afternoon with my family.
Today, was the day to pack a picnic and embrace the time I am given with those I love and love me.

We packed 14 of us into my sister-in-laws 15 passenger van and headed to The Wilderness ZOO.

We used to do family outings like this all the time. Then the family got too big and too separated. I miss the old days. "There is a season for everything under the sun."

I took a minute to look around at our family all organized in the van. We are each so different. So individual. I look at myself. I am high strung and easily excited. I have these quirks about myself that annoy me; therefore, I know they annoy others. I am loud and some might even say obnoxious.
We are each one different.
Different doesn't mean wrong.
But together we are strung with love. We accept one another, we love one another. We try to build each other up. It is not always easy. But we lay aside minor annoyances for the bigger picture.
FAMILY.

A little game of chicken

Our days are numbered. We choose how we will spend our days. We can choose to live with resentments, anger and strife. Or we can get over ourselves and come together and love one another because IT is the right thing to do.

There will always be a reason we can get our panties in a wad. ALWAYS.
"Oh you don't know what She said about me..."
"Oh, You don't know what they did too me.."
"Well, I just can't get over...."

WHO are YOU HURTING??

YOURSELF.

 Today, was made up of moments that I will always have. It wasn't a day of emptiness. A day LOST in the emotions of negativity.
I have enough wasted time there.
A day lost with regrets.
I have enough regrets as well.

Philippians 3:13  “Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

Our days are numbered. Choose to live them in Love. Choose to engage in peoples lives that Love you.
You can't buy time.
You cant stretch time.
Before you know it, the hours turn to days and the days turn to years and it is gone..all gone..
Live Life In Love.
Live Life with no Regrets.
Live Life for Others;  Building One Another Up.

Well...Time is running OUT..I need to go stretch, roll and do my exercises. .

Anita

Past Denial

It was about 4pm and I was driving back to White Lake to pick Austin up from his job. I had been on the go all day.
Austin got his first paycheck and wanted to spend some of it. After he got in the car we headed to the bank. I wanted Austin to learn a little money management.

• Give God some
• Save some
• Spend some

With money in his new account and money in his pocket, we headed to Tillys to spend a little!

The best route to get to that side of town is to go through Pontiac.
As we drove down Walton Blvd so many memories crossed my mind.
"Austin, do you remember going this way to see grandma?" I asked
"Yes, mom." He replied out of love. I think Austin was just being sensitive to seeing me reminiscing.

I counted all the miles I had drove to get Austin where he needed to be and the ones yet to do.

• 7:30am I picked him up at the high school from lifting.
• Drove him to White Lake to work
• Picked him back up at 3:30
• Drove him to Bank
• Drove him to Mall
• Drove him home then to CC
• Pick him up from CC.

Going down memory lane I had another thought. "Austin, You know how lucky you are?" I continued. "When I was a kid I couldn't do any sports. The little bit that I did, I couldn't count on my mom to pick me up."
I explained to him how my mom wasn't dependable. I would wait for sometimes 2 hours for my mom to pick me up. If she showed up she was 2 sheets to the wind. Most of the time my grandma showed up.
Driving through Pontiac brought back many memories of being a child. I looked around as I drove towards Baldwin Rd.
How did I escape this? The brokenness, the drugs, the alcohol, the confusion?
By the Grace of GOD.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I saw Clint for PT at 1pm. "Anita, How are you doing?"
"UGH..We have to get this show on the road, This stinks, I am so upset."
Clint very seriously responded "Hmm, Well, you know the stages of Grief?'
"Yes, Elisabeth Kubler Ross, I know them, I am in between Anger and Depression." I whined.
"Well, at least you are past Denial!"

I am PAST Denial! He even had me on the Altra G treadmill. He had me run on the anti gravity machine. I only ran a mile and could feel it creeping up. Without much thought I turned it off and unzipped myself out.

“Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose.”
― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Anita

Chasing Andy Around

I have had many lonely long runs that ran over 3 hours. In the summer months one of the biggest concerns is running out of  water.
On these long runs I would give Andy my route and he would bring me water. Training for my ultra last year I had runs that reached over 7 hours. He would chase me around to check on me, make sure I had nutrition, water and I was not road kill.

I did the chasing today. As Andy was getting ready to go for his long run;16 miles, he asked if I was going with him. I knew he was testing me. "NOO Andy, I am not running." I said confidently. My words were strong but my heart was weak.

I can not express how good a hot menthol bath feels after a 21 mile bike ride in the heat of the day.
I chased Andy all over the town of Holly. You can spit from one end of Holly to the other. I was literally ALL over tracking Andy on his long run making sure he had proper water.

My skin is torched from the beating sun. The dried sweat felt like sand paper as it crumbled all over my face, shoulders and arms. I smelled like funk, my Versace perfume had long been tainted with body odor. I love the woodsy smells of the outdoors, but not on me.

This was the longest bike ride I have done since I was about 22. I had the day off and road from my Clarkston apartment to my place of employment in Pontiac. I only did that once.

With cold water I tried to hunt Andy down to make sure he was hydrated.
The first stop I found him he looked great. He was about 7 miles into his run at that point and was all smiles.
He looked like a totally different person by the last stop. I found him running through the village. I had to ask a old man if he had seen a guy running because I couldn't figure out what direction Andy had gone. I finally caught up to Andy. When Andy turned around to get the icy water I was reaching to him he looked like death. His skin was all pasty, his eyes were bloodshot and he was out of breath. "Ugh, WHERE have You BEEN?" He cried. I didn't have time to explain that I couldn't find him. I was exhausted myself and I had to get home to pick up my son from his girlfriends house.
I was trying to calculate the miles I had rode my bike. I was DONE. My entire body was just tired. I was hot, sticky, hungry, whiny, tired..I could go on and on.

I felt pretty good today not running. I was proud of myself for keeping my running shoes on the shelf.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I BOUGHT a new toy last week. I am a BIG smoothie maker. I make about 10-14 smoothies a week. My smoothie maker DIED 2 weeks ago.
I upgraded my Magic Bullet to the Nutri Bullet. It has twice the power and is larger for just a little more money. I paid 89$ at Bed Bath and Beyond and was able to use my 20% coupon on it!

I make Austin a CHUBBY BUNNY Smoothie almost every night. He lifts weights 3 days a week at 6am, runs Cross country 5 days a week, started working construction with my nephew and brother-in-law 3 days a week and plays basketball. I will often hear him when everyone is winding down up in his bedroom working out and finishing his day off.
The purpose of the Chubby Bunny is to give him calories, vitamins, protein and recovery.

CHUBBY BUNNY

• Banana
• Vanilla Ice Cream
• Milk
• Chocolate Ovaltine
• Juice Plus Complete Vanilla (Whole Food based shake mix)
• 2 Tabls Peanut Butter

Tart Berry Smoothie

• Tart Cherry Juice (Reduced inflammation)
• Raspberries
• Strawberries
• Blueberry yogurt
• Kale
• Juice Plus Complete
• Ice

Very Proud of Andy. He ran 16 miles. He still doesn't know what he is running for! I am proud of him for just being committed and dedicated.

Side NOTE: Anyone Else out there watching the new series The Strain on FX??
I watched it last week, I LOVE scary movies. I think I am hooked.


Anita

Throwing in the Towel

I go back and forth with this injury issue. I know you can run through IT band injury. I am considering putting running on the back burner for a couple weeks again. I did this a few weeks ago for about 10 days.

The more I read the more I am resigned to just hanging up the running shoes for a couple weeks. I did this about a month ago but not for as long.

Facing the Facts:

• It is NOT getting any better
• I am just as discouraged as I was 6 weeks ago

The Remedy:

• Continue to see Clint
• Stop RUNNING
• ROLL, stretch and ICE everyday right alongside brushing my teeth!
• Strength Exercise, work on glutes and hip
• Bike/ Cross Train

I found these Exercises for strengthening my glutes and hips.

BIKING:
Biking has no impact forces that will aggravate my injury. Biking will help maintain fitness, circulate healing blood flow, and help me recover as quickly as possible.
It will also prevent me from loosing to much fitness.
The idea is to just make sure I am focusing on spending the same time biking as I would running. Typically, you double your distance if you are going by miles. So if you run 5 miles, you should try and bike 10 miles. The time should calculate very similar as well. Biking should consist of a quality work out, try not to be too leisurely. You want to maintain a high cadence. Pedal turnover not pushing gears that can cause muscular soreness.
Biking helps to strengthen your quads.
Biking is also a great alternative to running for us injured runners because it isn't a weight bearing exercise.

I will be BIKING in addition to the above Remedy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
12 miles biking today. It was a total SNOT FEST.
I know I have had some allergy issues as of late, However, I had NO idea that much nose juice was up there.
The harder I pedaled the more my nose ran. I was glad that something was running because it sure wasn't me!
I was launching snot rockets every few minutes. The faster I pedaled the more I felt the need to wipe my nose. My aim was terrible. I am not very coordinated to just ride the bike down the dirt roads. I was huffing it this morning with the wet gravel giving me more friction with my tires. Now I was trying to maneuver a snot rocket with 1 hand and maintain my speed. I had snot across my cheek, on my shoulder and large splatters of the warm gooey mess on my quads.
You might be wondering why I didn't just stop.

Pretty sure I had a face similar to this as I was HUFFING it on my Bike!

I am a daydreamer. Remember the movie SPEED? How Sandra Bullock couldn't go below a certain speed limit or the hijacker would kill people. I pretended that if I stopped pedaling I would be shot. I know it sounds cheesy but It worked.
I spoke out loud to my self as I headed up a wet soggy hill. "Come on NITA, Let's go, Get up, Get UP!"
Still pedaling I could feel my quads burning. I got excited knowing I was still going. "Good, Keep going, Go, Go ." I chanted to myself throughout the dirt roads, where no one could hear me except my tired body.
I could feel some frustrations surfacing. I was mad at my body for failing me. I was angry that my body wouldn't let me run. The more angry I got the more I pursued going harder, faster and stronger. As the Anger burning I wanted to direct all my frustrations right there, on the wet gravel, hidden in the canopy of trees.
Finishing up my ride I found myself back in town. This is where I DIED. A car pulled out in front of me causing me to hit my brakes. GAME OVER. It was fun while it lasted.


In closing, I had not made the official choice to quit running until my fingers hit the key board. The more I typed the more I felt comfortable making the decision. I stared at the words with thoughts of hitting the DELETE button. Maybe even the Backspace button.
Instead I will hit the ENTER Button. And Enter into a 2 week hiatus and see what happens.

Prayers Appreciated and seriously welcomed.
Anita

Setting Boundaries

4 Miles. I ran 4 miles with Erin. She text me last night to see if I wanted to run with her this morning. I love running with people. I miss running with partners. For that matter, I miss a lot these days.

1. I miss running with Danielle
2. I miss running mileage
3. I miss running with passion
4. I miss running speedy
5. I miss being sore from running
6. I miss running pain free
7. I miss hills and repeats and tempo runs and all that goes along with the hard training.

Oh Jeesh, I miss so much. I am thankful that I can run at all. I am just trying to maintain some kind of miles to be able to run the Detroit Marathon in the fall.
I worry about if I will be able to run the marathon.
I worry about if I will be able to train pain free.
I worry about if I will be able to run the CRIM, which I have not even signed up for yet.
I hate that I even worry about all this. But I do.

I tell people all the time to not worry, and I am not good at doing it myself.

Even outside of running, There is so much stress going on with the home front.

Running has always been my best outlet. It is my quiet time with myself and God. But I struggle with that time because the pain interrupts my thoughts.

Running has allowed me to organize facts from emotions. It has allowed me to discern others peoples emotions that they try to direct at me.
It is always a challenge to do the right thing when it feels wrong. And sometimes it feels wrong to do the right thing.
But it is THE RIGHT THING.

The Thoughts RUNNING In My HEAD:
I can not engage in negativity, purposely.  We all have issues. Some of us choose to work on them and some of us choose to blame others for how we feel or the place we are in.
BUILD A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT.
God knows I have a plenty of people I could blame a million bad choices I have made on.
But in the end..They were MY choices.
I CHOOSE what I will do with the cards I am dealt with. I choose who I let love me or hurt me.
I choose to be happy or sad in my circumstances.
I choose who I want in my circle.

And MY CIRCLE has to consist of people who LOVE ME. People who are going to make me a better person. I am not a VICTIM. I don't play that card. If someone doesn't like me or is nasty to me I am NOT going to invite them in my CIRCLE to continue to bleed negativity and hurt into my life.
I MAKE the CHOICE though.
I have to find the courage to stay clear of those who are discouraging, hurtful, discontent and HAPPY to bring me down to their level.

Proverbs 15:1

"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."   

Have the Courage to set boundaries. Make them in LOVE, not with bitterness or resentment. Love your enemies and pray for them. It is not always easy to love those who are not nice to you, you can love them from a healthy distance often times better.
Boundaries are not set up to keep you OUT, they are set up to keep ME in the best place I can be.
They are made not to punish, hurt or discipline others, they are set up to strengthen, build, and recover who I am supposed to be.
Boundaries are not designed in fear, hate or anger, but in love, courage and healing.

Anita

Plunger Therapy!

My Day and Thoughts in 3 Parts:

BIKING: I was in the hurt locker when I started out on my bike this morning. I wanted to go check out Rose Oaks trails.

It was almost 4 miles to get there.
The boys borrow my bike and are always messing with the gears. For the most part of the way to the park I was trying to tweak my gears. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with them, I was having a hard time pedaling. I came to the conclusion the gears were fine, it was ME that was having a hard time! My legs were Jello from yesterdays 11 mile run. Wimpy wimpy wimpy. I was a bit discouraged.

Approaching the trails I was getting more and more excited. It was stunning. My eyes were bouncing off one magnificent scene right into another. The smells of the woods, the heat of the morning and the landscape created by God was almost to much to handle. I pedaled faster wanting to see more.

It was not long that in all that beauty I discovered a BEAST. Better yet, the beast discovered ME.
I was getting eaten alive by TRACKER JACKERS!

Maybe they were just flesh eating black flies. They were in serious swarms all around me.
I brought water and used the trail maps to navigate my way through the woods. Just when I was thinking I was Columbus with the maps I found myself lost. Well, I guess that is correct too though.
I hated getting off my bike to figure out on the map where I was, or wasn't due to the horrible attack of the feasting flies.
The trails are located in between 3 lakes. This explains the bug infestation.
I began to get concerned for time, so I pedaled faster. I pedaled even faster when I noticed the bugs weren't keeping up as much. Burning quads or bitten by flying beasts...Quads hands down.

Biking: 12.5 miles.
Half a dozen bites and a great farmers tan!

The Toilet Plunger:

I had a 1pm visit with Clint. I brought The Plunger! He actually used it on his guy patient first. His assistant brought it over to me. She lubed it all up and squished it on my leg. The suction seemed better than the guys. I guess they are going to have to shave their clients legs to get optimal results!
Clint would move the plunger down my It band holding the suction. It reminded me of how my legs felt like Jello all over again!

You could actually feel the suctioning. I was laughing most of the time at the thought of having a toilet plunger sucking my legs. I was really laughing at the thought of them removing the suction to discover a 6 inch hicky on my leg.

My Thoughts;
Wikipedia:  Jealousy is an emotion, and the word typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something of great personal value, particularly in reference to a human connection. Jealousy often consists of a combination of emotions such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness and disgust.

Most of us struggle with this emotion in one place of another. But there is a KEY word I like in the definition: Emotion.

For me, I have struggled with it in different arenas. There are days, weeks even when life is smooth sailing. Then it just takes one comment, one situation, one photo that messes me up and I am left feeling, discouraged, damaged and doubtful. It all starts with being DISTRACTED.
We become distracted when:

1. Others behaviors and NOT our OWN.
2. We focus on choices made by SOMEONE else.
3. We focus on the PROBLEM not the SOLUTION.

Keep Your Eyes focused on GOD and His will rather than circumstances you can or cannot control.
Jealousy and envy lead you into a pit of discouragement and doubt. You then become hostage to yourself and hurtful to others.
Run Your Own Race.

"Discouragement is dissatisfaction with the past, distaste for the present and distrust for the future. It is ingratitude for the blessings of yesterday and indifference for the opportunities of today. it is insecurity regarding strength for tomorrow. " William A. Ward

Anita

No Shame

Running at 1pm in the afternoon, in the middle of July is not the smartest idea. Running in the heat NOT hydrated is even more of a nut job move.

Andy had 15 miles to run today.
I had 11 miles in HOPES to run today!

I jumped in with Andy after he had completed a little over 4 miles. We both took water and we dumped one water bottle on the path to have coming home.

My It band was irritating me basically the whole time.
Today, was a different run for me.
My husbands, Aunt Lois from Chicago was recently diagnosed with NON Hodgkin's Lymphoma. The news has been devastating. She is going through a barrage of emotions. From sadness, to fear, to acceptance to being hopeful, Aunt Lo is trying to grasp this terrible diagnosis.

Aunt Lois is right next to me~

No matter how much pain I was going to have, I was determined to RUN for HER. I was going to ask God to give me Strength, the same Strength I was going to ask HIM to give her on her  difficult journey.
I thought of the different things I wanted God to supply me with. They were identical to the things I was praying He would supply HER with also.

• Strength
• Endurance
• Healing
• Courage
• Determination

I Dedicated my 11 mile Run to Aunt Lois.
HOWEVER, I almost didn't make it.

But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”    John 4:14

 

Andy hit HIS wall at HIS mile 11. I think the whole building and the wall fell on him. He ran out of water, was running like a drunkard and was grunting unfamiliar sounds. He had taken his shirt off which is something he would NEVER do. I knew that for him to run half naked he was hot.

We were running 5:1 intervals. We were running a beautiful route in the back roads. A route I had never taken before. It is hard to grasp the beauty when you are in pain. We came out of the dirt road into full sun and heat. The paved road had no shoulder. This is where I began to notice Andy was struggling. He was coming really close to oncoming traffic. He was running on the white line as though he didn't see the cars inches away from him. I yelled at him a couple times as we were coming up place a of elevation. He grumbled something and collapsed in the shade. I looked at him and he looked blazed. He was out of water, his breathing was erratic and his eyes were bloodshot.
I quickly gave him the rest of my water. "DRINK, drink as much as you need."
My mind was racing. How was I going to get him to our water drop over 2 miles away?
I coaxed him back up. I gave him places to focus on. "Just get down the hill, Andy."  Then I would add "Relax and breath"

We managed to make it to our water dump stop. Andy ran in front of a car. I apologized to the driver and went to find the bottle of water.
I found the bottle and gave it all to Andy but managed a swig for myself.  I had hydrated throughout the morning, Andy had not. I had even asked him if he was going to drink some water. "No, I am fine." He replied
He didn't look so FINE now!
That water was gone within a mile.

As we finished up our last 2 miles, we were running through town. Mrs, Melero, one of the teachers at my kids school was coming out of her car. She looked at us and said "HI!'
She must have sensed something was not right. She asked Andy if she could get him some water. Without hesitation Andy yells "OH YES, Yes, You are such an ANGEL."
He walked right into her house as she filled up his bottle. I laughed at his half naked heat stroked body desperate for water. Mrs. Melero asked if she could fill mine up too. "No, thank you, we are almost home." Quickly Andy intervenes, "Yes, that would be great!"
I Thought I would DIE! Andy is normally so reserved was not at all shy now.

We thanked her repeatedly.
A couple feet away from her house Andy says "Anita, I think she was a ANGEL sent from God! Just for me and you know I don't think like that!" Then he added several times "An Angel.."

We made it home. Andy just about had a heat stroke but I don't think he will ever run in the heat without planning better hydration again.
I was DONE. The route we did had several hills. Hills and IT band friction are not a good combination.

RUNDOWN;
Distance:11 miles
Intervals: 5:1
Pace: 10:27
Headed to Gym after taking care of Andy and making him a recovery drink.
Iced for 15 minutes
Stretch and roll.

I dedicate todays RUN to Aunt LOIS, and many more. One step at a time, day by day, with courage and strength.

Anita

My Safe Place

I double booked my appointments today. Not like that is a  shocker.
I made a massage appointment and a PT appointment both at 1pm.

My massage was able to be moved back, therefore everything worked out. I am not getting the kind of massage you drool over. They are mainly focusing on my IT band and legs. It is actually quite painful.

My Physical Therapy with Clint Verran today went well. Like last week Clint asked me how I was doing. My response remained the same, "UGH".

His office was rather quiet. Clint likes to talk in groups. Laying down on the table Clint talks to me and whoever else is in the clinic. It is very entertaining. I learn a lot about running and injuries. Getting PT with Clint is great for not only recovery but also for training because he is such an elite and full of info. He works as a coach for me in many ways. Don't tell him though because that is extra!

While I was getting my It band raked with Clint's elbow a guy walks in. He was a younger man with dark hair. I was watching him stare at "Clints wall". This is a wall in the waiting room with a large poster of Clint running the Boston marathon. He came in 10th place that year! He has some other accolades as well as several dozen medals.

After a few minutes Clint invited this man over to us. Clint asked if I was "Ok" about talking about my case. I am a open book. Anxious to hear what was going to be said, I quickly responded, "Yes, that's fine."

Hungry for Coaching;

THE GUYS Background: Marines. Training for Special Forces, does a lot of lifting and weight training, runs a 5k every other day at a 6 minute pace.
The Guys Compliant: He was describing IT band symptoms.
I listened intently to the dialogue between Clint and THE GUY. He asked questions like:

1. Should I run Faster?
2. Should I lift more? Doing more Squats?
3. I get pain when I do step ups, should I not do those anymore?
4. I have to run a certain time for my training, what if I can't do it?
5. How do I get that time for the distance I have to achieve?
6. What if I have a flare up for my test and can not accomplish the time I am supposed to get?
7. What does that Roller do?
8. How do I get faster?

As I listened to all his questions I began to figure out his purpose. This guy didn't need a Physical Therapist, He WANTED a COACH.
He was in the marines. He was used to someone telling him what to do and how to do it. And he got the results he needed. This Guy wanted someone to do the same for him with RUNNING. He was a gifted runner. But he knew nothing about running expect to lace up his shoes and GO! Knowing what he knew worked well for him all this time until the passion for running exceeded the discipline of running. He no longer wanted to just RUN. He wanted to have purpose running. Before Running served a purpose, now running was the purpose.
He was hungry to know more to learn more and to try more.
Clint would listen to his questions that came right out of Running 101. Clint very gently answered his questions or had me answer them. I loved all his questions. His interest to learn more ignited my passion to run. But also to coach, to encourage.

RUNNING 101: 5 BASIC TIPS

1. Check YOUR shoes: You will never enjoy running if you end up broken. Go to a PROFESSIONAL RUNNING STORE for your first pair of shoes and get fitted properly.
2. CHANGE it UP: Go to the track and do repeats, run through your neighborhood and do fartleks, find a running partner and meet once a week to run, lengthen your distance, speed up your pace
3. Stretching and icing is NOT cliche': Add them to your runs
4. Minutes NOT Miles; NEW RUNNERS, don't think on terms of miles think on terms of minutes when first starting out.
5. Subscribe to Runners World or purchase some running books to give you some encouragement, inspiration and training tips.

I have been running for about 12 years now. I read a lot, I listen a lot, I watch videos and even after 12 years of running I am still eager to learn. I love being a coach but I also LOVE being Coached.

HERE's What I learned TODAY.
Next week I am going to be Clint's guinea pig for a new procedure! Check it out here:
The Plunger

BIKEDOWN:15 miles.
I thought my day was going well. I was biking through town on my way to the state park.  When I arrived in the haven of the park something happened. Tears came streaming down my face. I have so many burdens right now that are really pulling on my heart strings. I have pressures that I have been trying to resolve with a good attitude. I have demons that haunt me every so often. And Ariel, I just lost all reservations that I didn't know I had.  
Being outside in the middle of Gods country is my Safe Place. I can be at the feet of God. The Bible says "Every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that I am LORD."  The farther away from this world I get the more I am brought to my knees in HIS creation. I Feel HIM, I See HIM, I Hear HIM. In my safe place, my place of refuge deep in the woods hidden from human life I am broken. I am free to relieve my innermost feelings. As my heart mumbles He interprets and comforts me. As my prayers are murmured I am comforted by his presence not just around me but within me. The deeper I go them more clear he I can hear him and feel him.


DID YOU WATCH THE VIDEO? WHATS YOUR THOUGHTS??

Anita

Wednesdays Words

Lets keep it Simple today. Lets not get to wordy.

G.A.C.= Genesys Athletic Club. I give a lot up for this membership. Mainly my clothing allowance. A girl loves her closet, but this girl loves her Athletic Club.

8:30 AM- Out of the house a little late.

Rolling Rolling Rolling- One word, three times! A whole lot of rolling and stretching before sweating.

TREADMILL- Not the DREADMILL. I wasn't dreading the machine I was dreading the thought of my injury preventing me from running.

Clint Verran- Good Ole Clint said that I could try to run a treadmill. If I was going to try and run that was a better option.  It is more even than running outside.

Coaching- ARE YOU TEACHABLE?? "Shoulder Back, run with your core, light as a feather, BREATH." As my feet began to turn over on the treadmill I constantly spoke to myself. It is one thing to coach yourself, it is another to DO what your coach says! As I began to get fatigued I had to coach LOUDER to myself. I had to remind myself the importance of running properly.

3 MILES!- "If it is worth the Prize it is Worth the FIGHT" Sometimes the fight isn't going all out. For me the fight was NOT performing with intensity, it was intensely staying disciplined for the bigger picture.

IT BAND- Yes, for those of you wondering. Yes, the friction across my knee began as I approached 2 and 1/2miles. The sweat from anxiety was dripping down my temples. I tried to remain positive. I tried to keep happy thoughts. I tried to keep my glass half full for just a little bit longer. And I did!

Contentment- 3 miles not fast, not slow but consistent. As the laps turned into miles my face turned into smiles!

Cold Plunge- After running, rolling, stretching and abs I headed to the torture chamber. 15 minutes in the frigid waters. The most welcomed pain.


RUNDOWN:
Distance- 3 miles
Time- 26
Pace- 8:40

Verse of the Day- "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content" Phil 4:11


Anita

Motivational Monday: Gods Glory

"My upbringing gave me a strong will, a mental aggressiveness in what I wanted to achieve." Paul Tergat, of Kenya, held the world record in the marathon from 2003-2007, with a time of 2:04:55

Strong Will: I always wonder if this is a blessing or a cursing. Growing up with a single mother who battled drugs and alcohol my whole life harvested a Strong Will within me. So much so that many times I found myself to be my own worst enemy. I didn't know how to back down or throw in the towel. I hated to give up on anything, it made me feel weak. I grew up feeling weak because I couldn't get my mom to quit using. I grew up feeling defeat and helpless. I HATE this feeling.

"They say you can't run away from your troubles. I say you can." John Bingham

Maybe I couldn't run today, that didn't stop me from riding my bike over 12 miles. I biked with persistence. 12 miles on a bike isn't  far but I went with everything I had trying to get a little balance between my ears. There is so much going on at home, from family sick, to teenage drama to trying to get a house my head is full of noise. The faster I went the clearer life began to look.

"Learn to run when feeling the pain: then push harder." William Sigei

The ground was wet from the early morning storms. The pot holes were doubled and full of mud. With the dirt roads saturated with rain it made pedaling a little more strenuous. I buckled down as I felt my quads burning. "Come ON ANITA, come on." I barked at myself to push harder.  The more I heard myself breathing the more I liked what I heard.

"I assess the power if A Will by how much RESISTANCE, PAIN, TORTURE it endures and knows how to turn to its ADVANTAGE."

I Just Want to RUN. I will invite my body and my mind to elements of human torture, with pleasure if it gives me back what I want.
As I elevated up the dirt road with muck spitting all over me I reminded myself to seek MORE. I could feel my quads burning as I came up on my seat and drove my toes towards the surface.
I wanted MORE, I wanted it to hurt so good. I was burning more than sweat and adrenaline. I was burning all the garbage the day wanted to hold. ALL the CRAP that this world wants to discourage us on. Some was emotional, some was hurtful, some was unexplainable but there was a lot that I wanted to burn right alongside of my quads!

"Like a bird that strays from its nest is a man who strays from his home."    Proverbs 27:8

 

I was moving at a pretty good clip when I passed something that caught my eye. It didn't startle me, however, it did confuse me. It was a little bird that I came within inches of riding over. The little bird was alone and didn't even flinch. I turned around to check on him and see if he would fly away. This little guy just stared at me. I didn't know what to do to help him. I grabbed a stick to see if I could coax him to fly. He fluttered a bit but that was all. I could hear something over my music. As I turned it down I heard a bird chirping loudly. I moved the little bird out of the road with HOPES that the chirping I heard was his mother. I went away believing this little stray bird would find his way to safety.

 

 



"On the glorious splendor of your majesty, and on your wondrous works, I will meditate."   Psalms 145:5

I made a right hand turn and was awestruck by the acres and acres of beauty to my left. I pulled my bike to the side of the road. I stared at the splendor in front of me. A large hawk circled above me. Drifting in the breeze. I was speechless. Across the pond were deer deep across the field. Sand cranes were hunkered in their nests. And the noise of nothing more than Gods creatures brought shear Peace.

I can find gratitude in my broken state. I was circled by Gods Glory all around me.

 

 



Lastly: Today, my son Austin Motivated me. My 14, almost 15 year old got out of bed by his own alarm and was out the door by 5:45 am.
This boy of mine has not learned the art of disciplining his tongue but does a really great job at staying focused and driven on achieving his goals.
I was so blessed to see his discipline when he could have been sleeping in and staying up late. He made me proud. His action Motivated me to Stay focused and Do What Has To Be DONE!

Please Share, Who Motivated you? Was it a person, a Song, An Idea?

Anita

Having HOPE with this Broken Body

"A man's spirit can sustain his broken body, but when spirit dies, what hope is left?"   Proverbs 18:14

 

 

I wish I could just "WILL" everything to work properly. I wish I could just "Good Attitude" my broken body into health.

 

I have gone from running the Boston Marathon in April to barely getting double digit runs in since.

 

I have gone from 800 meter repeats to barely able to run 800 meters at any pace!

 

Today, was Andy's long run. More than wanting to run for myself I want so badly to be able to train along side him. I wanted to encourage him, coach him and cheer him on to his final destination, (I think is the marathon, he is not telling).

 

I could hear Clint (PT) in the back of my head, "Yeah, you can run, but I would run close to home in case you have to walk back home."

 

14 miles is where Andy was at today for his long run. That distance was NOT an option for me.

Throughout the week I have been doing everything I have been told to do. I have rolled my ITband with tears down my face.

I have iced my knee after every work out.
I have prayed and asked others to pray.

I have doubled up on my Juice Plus.

I have done extra exercises at home even when I totally do not feel like it.

 

Andy had his run all mapped out. It was a 9 mile loop that was fairly flat, then an additional 5 miler. It was half back roads with tree cover, with the other half -full sun down the main roads.

"Anita, the loop I have planned to do is a little over 9 miles, I am not sure you can do it." Andy said with concern.

I replied with Hope, "Andy, worse case scenario, I WALK home."  I then concluded  "Clint said I could run but I may end up walking, therefore it would be wise to stay close to home."

I knew that Andy was going to take those words without arguing with me. The Long Run is not a run that comes without anxiety. This run, although it is ran slow is still very nerve racking. Andy really needed someone next to him. I really needed to be the one he needed.

 

Together we stretched and rolled.

I laced up my HOKA's in hopes the extra cushion would help take the impact for me. I claimed the 9 miles with Christ. Desperately seeking God to keep my body strong. I questioned my reasoning, wondering if it was a smart move to run that distance, after all, I haven't ran more than 10 miles all week.

"I Can Do all things Through Christ Who Strengthen me."

We headed out the door. It was 81 degrees out at 2pm when our feet hit the pavement.

I was not much for words. I was hypersensitive, accessing my knee during every 5 minute interval. Because I have not ran very much I felt more fatigued. I convinced myself that I could run through a empty tank, my biggest concern would be my knee flaring up.

 

I just kept stringing my intervals together. "Andy, are we at 5 minutes yet?" I questioned him on every interval. 

When we made it to 5 miles there was NO Turning Back. I had two options: 1. Run it home. 2. Walk it home.

Andy asked how I was feeling. "On a scale of 1-10, I am feeling like a 4."

I was very grateful we were running as slow as we were. Our average pace was a 9:45. The walk breaks were highly favored and a Godsend.

 

After mile 7, I had a couple moments I thought I was going to end up walking it all the way in. The walk breaks recharged me and offered both physical relief but also mental relief.

 

They gave me HOPE.

 

I did it. Glory be to GOD, I MADE it 9 miles. I was exhausted. My knee was tapped out. I was ever so thankful for those who sent me prayers on my Running against the OdDs Facebook page. Special thanks to Matt L and Rachel D.

 

"A man's spirit can sustain his broken body, but when spirit dies, what hope is left?"   Proverbs 18:14

 

We have the power to give someone Hope. Just a few kind, supportive words can be such an encouragement to one another.

My body feels so broken and foreign to me.

The look on Andy's face before we ran reminded me of why it is important to support one another. Even in my broken state I clung to hope not just for me but also for Andy. He was consumed with fear. The long run does this to a lot of new marathon runners. The distance Andy was going to attempt to run was way out of his comfort zone.   

I needed HOPE. I couldn't afford to let fear of my IT band acting up prevent me from at least attempting to run.

I always coached the kids at school "Strong Mind, Strong Body." If we allow thoughts of defeat and discouragement rent space in our head we will give up before we ever start.

 

 

"Take hope from the heart of man, and you make him a beast of prey"

 



 

 Rundown:

Distance: 9.2

Pace: 10:15

Time: 1: 34

Ice 15 minutes Cold Plunge. I am hurting from the run. But I am not giving up Hope. I will Ice more, Roll more, Pray more, and do More Exercises. I just want to RUN.

 

Anita