Monday, April 2, 2018

The Heights: SICK

"The Sovereign Lord is my strength, He makes my fee like the feet of deer, he enables me to tread on the heights." Habakkuk 3:19

I am sick. I have been struggling with a head cold for the last 3 days. I do a great job at hiding it, like a pimple, I cover it up and pretend like its not really there.
But it is, the little rascal eventually bears its ugliness.

I had a 20 mile run scheduled for today. I was going to do everything I could to get through one of my last long runs before Glass City.

The stress of qualifying for Boston at Glass City was unsurfaced last week when Lacey asked me "Why haven't you registered for Glass City?" 
I debated being honest with her. I knew I had to come clean. "Lacey, I was secretly hoping you wouldn't requalify for Boston at Boston in a couple weeks, then I wasn't going to run Glass City because I wouldn't need to qualify..." 

My confession was out. But she loves me soo much that she just chuckled, and actually babied me a bit. "Anita, you got this, You are going to ROCK." 

This morning, I stayed longer than I should in my fuzzy pajamas. I drank 2 sips of coffee, mostly out of habit, the coffee wasn't even good. You know I am sick if I can't drink coffee.

Twenty degrees at 9am. Two sips of coffee. 1 banana.
20 miles of backroads and hills with a head cold. Let the fun begin.

I decided early on I would have polite conversation, save my energy. I would just let them gab and laugh it up. As the miles went on, their chipper giggling and laughter only made me feel more whipped. It was like they were foot loose and fancy, all giddy with candid conversation. While I was just trying to get over another stinking hill. I lead the pace most of the time, trying to stay focused on my pace. But the hills came, long, short, really stinking long. They made jokes about them, putting them on a scale system.
I pierced my eyes to the top and kept nailing them until I couldn't anymore, and I knew that was eventually coming.
I tried to drink, I ate my Honeystinger chews until my belly started cramping. At that point, I secretly giggled as my tush started letting out little squeaky toots! My body was too weak to try to hold them in. They were gabbing so much I don't think they heard anything from me.

In the valley of two hills, I had to take a call from my son, in those brief moments my bladder decided it was time to go pee. I was really hoping that was ALL I had to do. I found a flat rock, out of the pickers, and like a princess on her throne I did my business. As I pulled my britches up, I looked up to discover Lacey having a candid moment with me as her subject. Say Cheese!

I still had 5 miles back home. And more hills. I wish I could say I was proud of those last 5 miles.
We were holding a great pace. We were still maintaining a 9:30min/mi.
Mile 15: 9:06
Mile16: 9:33
But mile 17, my strength was fading. I was fading. I tried so hard to stay strong. My body was cramping. My heart was pounding. I still had another hill.
I tried to stay onward. But I felt like I was losing my grip. I wanted to just curl up in bed.
One more hill. I just had to make it up one more.
I thought about Boston. Do the Hard things Nita.
Mile 17: 9:47
Mile 18: 10:50 And this was a flat mile.
Mile 19: 11:14 I walked and made myself RUN. Another mile almost seemed impossible.
Mile 20: The last Hill...9:59.  I somehow managed to pick it up and bring it home.

The last hill, we brought our pace down and kept it steady. It took everything from my weak body and wobbly knees. But I was so happy that God had gave me the strength to get through the last 19 miles that the last mile almost made me smile.
I no longer looked at that last hill, that last mile, rather I looked at how FAR God had already brought me in my illness. I was actually really stoked.
20 miles of hills, head cold and gratitude.

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I was reminded today that sometimes I get caught up in the things that haven't happened, running 20 miles sick.
But I took it 1 mile at a  time. I tried to stay on pace. As each mile was conquered, I got a little more excited to see just how far God took me.

People often say to not look backwards. But I disagree. I get my strength from my yesterdays. I have seen God carry me, protect me, strengthen me and shelter me. He continues to give me Strength in my Weakness. He carries me to new Heights.

Anita

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