Crumbling into Place

Monday, I looked outside and there sat 9 inches of white fluffy snow resting on virtually everything. As beautiful as it appeared from my side of the window, it was much more magnificent to fully experience it.
Everyone was bailing on this past Mondays run. I even was bailing. I didn't have the proper running spikes and running trails sounded like I needed more than spikes, I needed snowshoes and a lot more meat on my bones to stay warm.

Things always work out. The more I looked outside, the more I heard a soft whisper calling my name...The backroads were thick and heavy with the fresh snow and no snow plows.
I was slipping and sliding. It didn't take long to break a sweat. Every muscle that was dormant was soon awakened. It took everything to stay upright. Rather than get frustrated at my clumsiness I found myself laughing out loud.

The sky was dark and eerie, reminding me something out of a werewolf movie. Almost as if I was  running in someone's shadow, only I  never could see them. I felt like I was chasing something dark and at the same time beautiful. As if,  I was flirting with a Vampire. Intriguing, beautiful, charming and altogether dark, mysterious and capable of so much pain.
Rundown:
Distance: 7.5miles
Pace: 10:08
My Ipod even died on this run. It was exactly what was supposed to happen. It was my invitation to take in all the elements and be fully engaged in GODS design. Things were really crumbling into place.

SEALSKINZ: Andy bought me these socks last Christmas and I finally got to try them out in all that snow. OH BABY! They were awesome. I was a bit leery due to the stiff fabric. I thought I would have blister for sure. NO SIR. My feet were so toasty and DRY. Not even a hint of a blister. Not bad for 50$ socks!
TODAY, I got rolling as quick as my feet could hit the ground. I had a lot to do and I didn't have much wiggle room. 10 degrees out was a NO BRAINER for me, I had my gym bag already packed.
I was on the track at Genesys at 7:35am.
Goal:7 miles, push the pace, but its not a race. I wanted to run through suck.
I was fine running alone for the first 2 miles. Then I saw a lady a little younger then me arrive. You can spot a hardcore runner a mile away. She was tall and lengthy. Her hair was pulled high, so her hair wouldn't touch her neck when she was sweating because runners work till they sweat and then keep working.  She was wearing a "RUN WILD ZOO 5K" shirt with 100$ compression socks carrying a water bottle. But it was the look she gave me that showed she meant business. I knew we would be chasing each other out there. I was definitely going to hurt after this run.
I came around the track on the long stretch and spotted her as she was making the turn.
"OK, Nita, just keep her in you eye. Stay with her." I followed her for the next 2 1/2 miles and she picked up her pace. I was running a 8:15min/mi. I was pushing it. I needed to push it. But I had to remind myself, I needed to appreciate the challenge without dying. I entertained the idea of running only 6 miles. She picked the pace up and I knew I couldn't pull another 2.5 miles running a sub 8 min. I just didn't have it. Slowly she disappeared around the track. I still wrestled with bowing out at mile 6. I was running out of time literally.
In the zone, I was trying to maintain a 8:20min pace when a younger girl passed me. It started me and I jumped. I had 2 miles to go. I was going to stay with HER now. I convinced myself I COULD DO IT. It was just how much pain was I willing to experience for the next 16 minutes.
Mile 6, I was at a sub 8 minute mile. I took a deep breath. I embraced the cold draft coming from the outer edge of the track. "Relax Nita, get used to your lungs burning, embrace the pain, you need to work."
I felt my stomach begin to churn. I knew I had nothing to throw up and yet I felt like I was going to vomit. "Run Harder Anita." This really meant, "MAINTAIN your pace you big wuss."
With one lap left, I was still behind her. I chuckled to myself thinking how she blazed pass me and yet she never fully shook me.
I saw the clock as I finished up. I had ran for 57:54 minutes.
7 miles.
I was content. I wanted to beat myself up for thinking that was a "GREAT" run. It wasn't that long ago I wouldn't have even sweat on a run like that let alone think I was going to puke.
But I was happy.  I ran through the SUCK. I didn't Willy Nilly it. If that pace was pushing it, then I pushed it today.

MY Thoughts not YOURS.
I remind others and on days like today I had to remind myself. You can't live everyday chasing your yesterdays. If you do that than you miss out on the victories of today.
My victory was in the pain I pushed through. It was on not quitting at mile 6. It was on meeting my goal. I had a lot to be smiling for, and that is exactly how I left the track. Smiling.