Monday, April 29, 2013

Show me your UGLY Face!




One of many UGLY FACES!

I pulled into the athletic club very tense. My anxiety was higher than normal but I knew I just needed to run it out.
I dropped off my gym bag in the locker, grabbed my Garmin and ipod and heading outside for a run.
I really didn't have a plan but to run about 7 miles because that was about all the time I had.

As I was trying to get satellite I decided to run a 5k in the trails of Genysis and then run the roads, finishing back at the hospital for about 7 miles total.

Motivation came easy with the right song blaring in my ears. I am sure I have my music up way to loud but it sure makes the legs turn over stronger and faster. I may go deaf prematurely but I sure will enjoy the ride along the way!

The trails were winding around ponds and through trees. The air was chilly but I was heating up fast as I continued to pace myself. I could feel my heart racing through my chest and it was awesome! The harder I was breathing the more I could feel the weight of the world releasing its grip on me.
In tune with my body and my surroundings I felt so humbled.  I gave thanks to God for the sweat on my brow and the lack of lung capacity I was feeling as I was maintaining a sub 8 minute pace.

Coming to the last quarter mile Eminem put motivation in my ears with his words from "Till I Collapse"

Cause sometimes you just feel tired,
Feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
And just pull that %$#* out of you and get that motivation to not give up
And not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse.

And like that I finish my 5K.  Looking down and I see 23:29 on my Garmin! "Where did that come from?" I stared in disbelief. Still moving I slowed my pace down with a bit with a smile sneaking out. 
4 more miles to do and it was not the time to get all cocky!  I could crash at any time. But as I ran down Baldwin road my legs still felt strong. However, when I ran back in to the athletic club they began to weaken. This 4 miles consisted of hills and I was heading to the pain locker. That last mile I had the UGLY FACE. You know the one...The face you look like you just ate a turd..Like you swallowed it whole and it is stuck in your throat. 
My face was all contorted, sweat was beading off my eyebrows and because I couldn't catch my breath  I was gasping for air.  My teeth were gritting together in determination not to slow down. 
As I finished my over calculated 7 miler I praised GOD. I had chill bumps running through out my body. I gave God thanks...Gratitude consumed me.
The Ugly Face is the Face of Endurance and Commitment. It is the Face that says "I will NOT quit." 
It is the Face that says "YOU will NOT Beat me down." It is the Face of a Overcomer..Overcoming pain, hurt, struggles, adversity, yourself......

I thought since I was meeting a friend, "Jessica" for another run I should probably do the cold plunge. 

I met "Jessica" at Independence Oaks for a coaching run. Jessica had a lot of questions about running. But as I observed her running form and listened to her run and breath I discovered that she didn't necessarily need a coach..She just needed encouragement!
I love encouraging new and old runners. I think I get more out of it then they do. 
We were made to run. We have had legs far before automobiles, bicycles or EXCUSES!

GREAT JOB:
  • "Jessica" for a incredible 4 miler today!
  • "Ryan P" for your first 2 MILER today! 
  • "Lori S" for supporting  Breast Cancer with the 3 day walk.
  • "Sarah B" running a 5K in Florida at midnight!
  • PHI SIGMA SIGMA for raising over 2000$. I attended a fundraiser Saturday to raise $ for the scholarship they created in my Niece Ariels' Name! 
Get Your Ugly Face on this week. 

Anita



Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Running Fits Support Boston RUN



When it comes to my running schedule I am very routine. "Danielle" shot me out a text yesterday asking me if I would like to join her in a running event hosted my Running Fit to support Boston. The run would be at Kensington Metropark and it would be a 4.15 miles.
After no time thinking about it, I had already text her "YES"!

My routine was to run this earlier in the day but because I have a hard time diverting from routine... I had a double run.

Run number ONE was beautiful but painful. The snow was falling heavy and thick . It was magnificent to look at until it turned into wind and sleet. Then it was slapping my face cold. I tipped the bill of my hat down and just ran into it.
5 miles and the legs held up good for a strong run.

Run number TWO did not go quite as I had imagined it. I was rushed and too diversified. I just had to much going on by the time I got in the car heading to Kensington. I had one kid having dinner with our youth pastor and I was taking my other sons' friend home all at the same time. Because I was rushing I got more miscombobulated! I took the wrong way to Kensington, I forgot my Garmin, I got in a argument with Andy and I got lost in the Park making myself late.
UGH!!
To add insult to injury I could not find "Danielle" because they had already started. While everyone else was running and laughing and enjoying the camaraderie of each other I was huffing and puffing trying to catch up to her. I was so embarrassed due to running hard to find Danielle I was out of breath, I was running so hard that people were turning around to look at "That person breathing like a zombie".
They had that look like "DUDE..it's not a race, chill out.."

I never found her but she found me looking for her at the finish.
We hugged and laughed and even took a couple pictures together. It was great to see her and the hundreds of people that showed up. I saw Boston Running jackets as far back as 30 years ago. There were runners and walkers and every age and size.
I was so encouraged by the unstoppable support.

I am very glad that I was able to go. Even if to top off the night I got terribly lost! I was thankful to my good friend "Holly" who kept putting in my locations and helping me get on the right road. She stayed with me on the phone till I saw a familiar road. I seriously got lost in my own town. I am not going to go into detail as not to embarrass myself more but it is bad...Lights are on but No ones HOME!

Good night,
Anita

Monday, April 22, 2013

1 week Later...Boston Strong!

We have been home now since Thursday afternoon. For every hour that I have been home I am reminded of the Love that is still out there.
Yes..There is Evil out there. There will ALWAYS be Evil in this world. But there is so much Good. So much Beauty and Kindness. Compassion and LOVE.
LOVE Conquers ALL.
I read a simple Facebook post in the aftermath of the Boston Bombings, "Evil never wins." (Sarah M)

I have had the honor to feel Pain. Yes, Honor.
True pain if used to its potential can gauge LOVE, Compassion, Joy, Happiness and so many other beautiful emotions.
.
Without Pain how do you appreciate the power of LOVE?
Without Pain how do you exercise Humility?
And Without Pain how do you discover Gratitude?

In the shadow of the bombings are images of not just my pain but more vividly the pain of others. The pain of innocence being stripped away. The pain of lives being forever altered and devastated. The pain
of visions and voices that echo in our ears.

"Do not be overcome by Evil but Overcome Evil with GOOD." Romans 12:21

Goodness is the air that I have inhaled the last 7 days. I have felt Love, Compassion, Goodness, and every warming emotion.
I have had the most moving messages from people I know and do not know and I can not even find the words to express my heart.

I have seen and felt LOVE. True Love and Compassion this week.  And it is Strong. 

I want to remind people that on the 1 week anniversary of this tragic event that WE will not hide in Fear.  

"Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever." Psalms 23:6

My family will never forget the horrible events. We will not take lightly that we were just 1 block from a different outcome. 
I will not take this life for granted.
I will live with Intention.  
I will recognize GOD in every breath that I breathe and every step that I make. 

I will not succumb to defeat. As I climbed up "Heartbreak Hill" every fiber of my body wanted to quit. The pain in my calves stung like bees. My heart was  raw and broken with the memory of Ariel. As I cried in emotional pain I could hear her voice calling me like it often did. I could hear our past conversations ringing in my ears. Her face was so close I could touch it, yet I knew she was no where in this world. I climbed further to the top of that hill, feeling like I wasn't moving at all. 
Maybe this is YOU...
What is your Heartbreak Hill?
On this anniversery of the Boston Bombings I will rise and go ON. I will look to the TOP of the hill and one step at a time I will conquer all that wants to hold me back. 

Because at the top of the hill lies Goodness, Compassion, Love and Every warming emotion!

Because LOVE Wins!
Boston STRONG: Boston Marathon 2014!! 
"For God does not give us the SPIRIT of FEAR but of Power, LOVE and Self Discipline." 
2 Tim 1:7
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 
RUNDOWN:
I have ran 3 times this week
  1. In Niagra Falls, Wed-..Easy 2 with Austin that was a reminder that I was still not ready to run! OUCH!
  2. Sunday: 5 miles progressive..Calves reminded me of the torture I inflicted on them..OUCH Again!
  3. Monday: 5 Miles trail..Watch died so I ran timeless and directional clueless..Got lost a couple times on the trail! 11 minutes in the Cold Plunge, what a difference. 
NOTE: Ran all 3 times in My Compression socks. For recovery after a race they recommend these and they feel amazing on sore Legs!
Anita

 








Thursday, April 18, 2013

Honored to Run The Boston Marathon:2013


We took the family on a road trip to Boston trying to make running the Marathon into a family vacation. We headed out Friday morning for 8 hours of driving towards New York.

Just the day before I had ran with my sons cross country team and had tweaked my knee. That was my first distress call.  I was quiet at first about sharing it but I knew I needed prayers.

As we arrived in the hotel the first night my stomach was not feeling settled. Again I tried to keep it silent.
That evening I woke up several times with a fierce case of the stomach flu. Unable to manage my body through the night I fell victim to vomiting and ...ugh, yes diarrhea.
This is where I began asking yet again for prayers.

I am not shy when it comes to asking for prayers. Praying for one another is one of the most powerful things we can give each other. It is a gift that costs you nothing and can give everything to someone else.

By Sunday night I was a witness to the miraculous power of the many many people that were praying for me. I had NO knee clicking or aching.
I had no fever and NEVER got sick again after Friday night!
I was so grateful and humbled by so many that volunteered to pray for me. For all those that signed up to pray for me throughout my marathon as well.

On Monday morning, Patriots Day,  I had to get up at 5am. I was more nervous about boarding the train alone than running the Boston Marathon.
Andy got up early with me and drove me into the train station. "Andy, your going to walk me into the train station right?" I asked a dozen times.
Calmly Andy replied, "Yes, Nita, You will be fine. Remember you take the green line into Park place then switch trains and take the red line into Copley."
AHHH...It sounded easy enough..easy for any other person BUT ME. I am directionally challenged. In most cases I could care less if I get lost I would just stop and ask. But today I could not afford to get lost. "Please God, calm my nerves, direct my paths, give me courage and knowledge to get to my destination." I prayed. And together in the car Andy gently held my hand praying for me.

Andy walked me up to the train station where together we got a coffee at Dunkin Donuts. Andy gave me some cash just in case I needed a taxi and kissed my goodbye.


Arriving on the train I located other marathon runners by their bright yellow Boston Marathon baggage claim totes.
"Just follow them, Nita." I told myself.
As we stopped along the way to our destination many more runners boarded the train. The excitement was elevating as we all were bonding with one another.
I asked the runners if they were all getting off at Park Place as well and they were too. I had a sense of relief until I heard most of them also say that was their exit point!
As I stepped off the train panic set in. whether or not to follow them or to do what I was scheduled to do.
"Stick with the plan Anita." I told myself.
Finding my next train I nervously jumped on and felt a little more at ease when I sat next to a city worker. Not shy, I confirmed with her  that I was supposed to get off at Copley.Having peace of mind I relaxed...
UNTIL the train passed right through Copley without stopping!
I glanced at her and I could tell she was confused.
She was so kind in helping me. She told me where to get off and which direction to go. Apparently Copley was closed therefore the train did not make that a stop.

As I got off I headed outside the train station all mixed up and lost. I walked out and had no idea where to go. But then I saw another City Official. Nervous I put on my nicest face and interrupted her morning with a touristy question. "Ma'am, I am so sorry, I was supposed to get off the train at Copley only it was closed and I have no idea how to get to the Back Bay Hilton, can you please help me?"
At first she brushed me off mumbling something I could not understand. She pointed and gave me directions that could not be understood either. I gently tried to repeat what she said back, pointing in the direction she showed me only wrong.
She then took here ear buds out of her ears and kindly looked at me speaking to me and walking me to the road where she wanted me to turn in to. She took me to where I could see where she was pointing..."HILTON".
I was so grateful, I did my best expressing this without jumping all over her with hugs and kisses!

"I have to meet Father Daniel" I told myself. I was so excited to see his familiar face. Even though I had just met Father Daniel 4 days ago I loved the idea of having that believers bond. I could Jesus talk, pray and feel that in him as well. We were not just running the Boston Marathon together but we were running it in Christ. We knew where our strength would be coming from, where our stamina would come from, where we would have to dig in and who we would cry out to.
We knew that nothing was impossible without HIM, and that we could do ALL things through Christ.

Arriving 20 minutes late at the Back Bay Hilton I located Father Daniel within the first couple minutes.
After just a few minutes together we joined the others and loaded the "Baumans Coach buses" we had booked weeks prior.
Father Daniel and his Sister

We had a 50 minute drive towards Hopkinton where the start of the Boston Marathon is.
Before Father Daniel and I separated I asked him if we could pray.
We both shared prayers that were different in words but the same in meaning. It was such an honor to have Father Daniel not only pray with me but also be asked to pray with him.

RUNNING BOSTON:
"Let us run with endurance the race God has set before us." Hebrews 12:1
Even in the nervousness of so many runners we all shared smiles of joy. Runners lined up and down the streets of Hopkinton. This is the Matriarch of Races. The Grandfather of them all. The Boston Marathon has entertained the fastest runners in the world. I was humbled by the thought of it all. Runners from all over the world have come out here to run and over 500,000 spectators and volunteers make this race iconic.
The warm sun brought even more cheer to the runners. We had the most perfect day to run 26.2 miles.
I was eager to start. I could feel Gods comforting hand removing any anxiety and giving me his perfect peace.

Just like clock work at 10:20am we moved forward towards the starting line and the next thing I new I was crossing the mat.

I had a plan. I had to run a sub 8 minute mile. The first 10 miles stick to my pace and PASS NO ONE. The crowds were deafening. At least5 people deep carrying signs, cowbells and high fives the crowds roared.
The children put their fingers out like you were a celebrity squealing when you clapped their little hands. 

For the first 6 miles I kept hearing "GO MARK!. Hundreds of times people were shouting his name. Who is this "Mark" guy? I looked all over trying to investigate who this popular runner was that was stealing the show.
At mile 7 I located him. He was wearing a sleaveless tank for a nursing charity and on the front in very large bold writing it said "MARK". It did not hurt that he was also about 6'2 and as bald as a cue ball. He had the look! I came up next to him and said "Your stealing all the crowd, everywhere I run I keep hearing your name!" Mark laughed and replied in a English accent  "What are you running?"
I responded "trying to go for a 3:30 marathon."
"I am too." he said.
"Well Mark, I think I need to stick near you because you have the best cheerleaders!"
And it was just like that I found a running partner.

Mark had never ran the Boston Marathon before and he was doing great. I was a little nervous about our pace at times because he was running around a 7:45 minute mile and running it strong.  Between the two of us watching our watches we coached each other with our pace and our miles.
Around mile 10 another gentleman came up on my left. He was about the same age as Mark. Late 50's early 60's. And also like Mark he too had an accent. This man was very jolly. He was laughing and full of conversation.
I soon discovered I was running with one man from Holland and the other, Mark, from England.
This was a first.
We decided to help one another to get to the finish line.

Welsey College would soon be approaching at mile 13. The excitement of running through this section would carry us for a few miles.
As we approached the all girls college there were so many signs you could not read fast enough!
Kiss me I am from BOSTON!
Kiss me I am From MICHIGAN!
Kiss me I am a ZOMBIE!
Kiss me I love Nerds!

And it was here that I lost the 2 gentleman!
I decided to keep pace. I knew that they would catch up and would have needed me to stay on target.

And I was right. As we passed all the yelling Mark approached first. "Ya, I think we may have lost him back there with all the gals!"
Laughing we continued moving forward where our lost kissing bandit arrived about a half a mile later.

We would soon be coming up on mile 16 where I was really looking forward to seeing my family.
I felt pretty good just still concerned when Mark took the lead because he was pacing at a little faster pace than I was.
I know to run my own race but I always pick someone to run with. Every marathon I have run I have a runner that I pace off of. Although I was going faster than I planned there was something in me that said "Stick to this Anita."
We lost the gentleman from Holland about mile 16. I began looking for my family on both side of the street.
Mile 17 was approaching I still had not seen them. I was getting sad that I may have missed them. The crowds were so thick with spectators that it was very possible I missed them.
"ANITA!!!" I heard Andy yelling!! There he was running right out unto the course. "You are KILLING it!" Andy screamed with intensity.  Running alongside me he asked how I was doing. He was full of encouragement and that is what I was going to be using to help fuel me the next 4 miles.

Let the HILLS come! This is where you have to start digging deep. The Newton hills started here. I knew I had banked some time but I still did not want to get into hat reserve if I didn't have to.

I was concentrating on my breathing and my plan. I wanted to maintain a 8-8:30 minute mile up the first couple hills.
Together we moved forward towards Heartbreak Hill.  But before we got there "Mark" was really struggling. I kept turning around up the hills to check on him. Seeing me trying to find him, he waved me to go. "Anita..Go!"


I knew I had to go. I put my head down and climbed to the top of the hill.
I thought of all those that were praying for me. I looked at my arm where I had written those that had dedicated miles.
As I looked up there lied Heartbreak Hill.Right in the middle of mile 20 and 21.  The tears shook my body. My Ariel. I had just lost my sweet Ariel 6 months ago.  What a name for the pain I was feeling, Heartbreak Hill. How appropriate. I had dedicated mile 21 for ARIEL and here I was running the most difficult part of the race with her at the forefront of my heart and mind.  It all just twined together. The tears began flowing down my cheeks and my shoulders were heaving. Everything hurt so bad ..."Ariel" I cried.
As I came to the top I knew I needed to get it together. I knew in order to finish this race I had to be strong. Swallowing hard I straightened my shoulders put my head up and prayed for strength.

JUST 5 more miles to go! I was feeling fatigue at this point. My quads were beginning to burn.
The hills were not done. I had a couple more rollers to go.
There were so many people all over. "Go Nita" I heard my name several times. People were reading my arm and cheering me on. I whispered thank you or gave a thumbs up to conserve energy.

Through each water station I went to the side walking and sipping. After 5-10 seconds I chucked my cup and headed back into the runners. 

By mile 23 I was feeling my legs heavy and tired. "Come on NITA, Stay strong just a little longer."
"CHEVRON"...This is IT! I could see that large sign ahead of me that marked the 1 mile to go.
Looking at my watch I had more 10 minutes to make it to the finish and PR.
Everything hurt. It even hurt to think.

"MAMA, NITA!!!!"
What? WHO? NO WAY!! There was Andy and the boys again! I could not believe it, how did they get here?
"Andy is amazing, How did he make it here?" I was totally in AWE!

I felt all those who were praying for me. I had no doubts, I had no voices of defeat. In all my pain I knew that I was going to finish. I can not describe the comfort of knowing God was going to give me victory, He was not going to give it to me without me fighting for it but he was going to give me what I needed to accomplish it.
My ears were ringing with the shouts and cheers of the hundreds of people lined up on both sides of the road. Music was in the background of the cheers. Cow bells were ringing with the thrill of the finish just ahead of me.
I could see the bright blue finish. My legs were like jello but my body was on autopilot. "Nita, you can finish this, stay strong, keep moving."

I could hear the announcer and the cameras were like paparazzi. There is was, the finish. My Emotions were driving me. Tears of happiness came welling down my cheeks as I ran over the finish mats. I looked at my watch, 3:28!
This was my fastest marathon. I shaved over 10 minutes off my last Boston Marathon in 2011!

I could hardly move as they corralled us towards the Mylar shawls that they gave us runners to warm up.
I headed in line to get my recovery food bag barely able to walk. My legs were burning and cramping.
After getting my food I slowly moved around the corner to the family meeting area. I knew I would be there a while after seeing Andy and the boys so close to the finish.
Shivering and cold I just relaxed and waited.

I spotted the boys coming through the crowd after about 25 minutes of waiting. They showered me with hugs and kisses. "Mom, You ran so good." Alec said.
"Mom, How did you keep your pace so well? We watched you all the way and could not believe how you paced yourself!"  Austin shouted so happy.
I just smiled and laughed. I was overwhelmed with gratitude and extreme joy. The crowds were all the same. Wall to wall people on the streets were all taking pictures of their loved ones victory.....

How quickly this iconic event had been sabotaged by evil.  This was just minutes before the bombing would take place. We would be less than a block away.

The evilness of man would strip away victories, laughter, families, joy, and a barrage of beautiful emotions.



Anita







 

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The Aftermath, Boston Bombings



After taking a few pictures in the family meeting area we headed out to find warmth and food.
We were saturated with the excitement of the crowds and the victories that were achieved.
Limping and cold I was so thrilled to have accomplished my best marathon time.
I was not prepared for the emotional shift that would happen just minutes away.

We were just a block away at the Prudential Center, heading to the food court to get some lunch. Andy and I separated to get our lunch.  Andy took the boys and departed to the right and I made my way through the crowds to the left. The food area was a enormous square with one wall made out of glass and a door heading out into a courtyard. There were hundreds of people between our two destinations.

“May I get some Clam Chowder?” I asked the man in front of me.
BOOM!
The walls shook and the man placing my order looked towards the courtyard windows.  He glanced back at me in confusion and another BOOM followed. This time I followed the direction of his gaze and witnessed birds flying away and several people pointing.
Still unaware of the events that had taken place I looked around and watched chaos erupt.
Hundreds of people were now running and screaming “Bomb, BOMB!”
I was frozen and alone,  from my family. I had no idea what had happened to my family or where they were. Panic and confusion circulated the hall.
Not knowing where or when the bombs were going off next I hunkered down behind a wall trying to remain calm. Many people were taking cover, crying and distraught.
I fearfully raised my hand screaming “ANDY”.  Cautiously, I lifted my head to look for my family.  “Andy, ANDY …” I cried.
I desperately searched all over the dining area for my boys and for Andy.
I saw Andy on the other side by the glass wall waving, I could hear the fear in his voice as he screamed “ANITA ,ANITA!"
As low as I could, I quickly made my way to them.
Alec was pale and frightened. Austin showed courage and honor grabbing me with both his arms trying to protect me from the unknown.  Now together, firmly Andy yelled “Stay HERE, DON’T Leave. Do You HEAR ME? Don’t LEAVE.” And just that like he left out the glass doors. Even though I knew Andy was going to investigate and make sure we were safe to leave I was so fearful of loosing him again.
Placed in the corner together we huddled. At this point hundreds of people were dispersed and scattered.
After what seemed like forever Andy came back and lead us outside.
It was surreal, ambulance and police were racing the streets.
Andy tried to listen and hear the responses to the people around us. We were all trying to put the pieces together. We headed down to Bolyston Street being instantly directed by police and city officials to exit the city.  “YOU MUST EVACUATE THE CITY!!” They shouted.

My body was shaking even with Austin’s hand grasping mine.
Unable to walk I asked Andy to please stop. Scared, confused and exhausted We headed into a Dunkin Donuts.  They were unaware of the events that had just taking place and did not understand our panic. Just trying to make sense from senselessness I sat down and sipped a cup of coffee.
Runners began trickling in. They were coming in alone, without family, without medals and without their food bag that we received after finishing to help recover. They were shaking, dressed to run but not anything else they were shivering and distraught. I got to see my family. They brought me warm clothes. I had water and food from finishing and Andy had a cell phone.  They had nothing, but fear and confusion.
Heartbroken for them I got up and started purchasing them warm beverages and offering them food from my food bag.
I learned these runners not only never saw their family or friends but they also did not get to finish their race after months of training.
The owner came out from the back and began learning of the terrible events. She was wonderful pouring hot drinks and helping in any way she could. She was even offering her phone but the city had turned off all phone service, no calls in and no calls out.
This kindness was displayed in so many ways. One of the gentlemen sitting there overheard that the trains were not running. He offered us a ride to our hotel on his way back to New Hampshire.
We decided to get out the best way we knew..by foot.
3 miles to a working train station out of the city. We took the RED Line out of Cambridge and got out of dodge.

This tragedy is now said to be the worst terrorist attack since 911.
 How could something so amazing be hijacked in seconds by evil?
The crowds hold over 500,00 spectators, 38,000 runners all overwhelmed with joy, excitement and cheer. The emotion is elevated closer to the finish you get. People are cheering you on like a rock star, calling your name and encouraging you and just like that it is depleted by corrupt hearts and evil intentions.

My heart goes out to the families that were engaged in this tragedy.  My heart is broken for you. The city of Boston is coming together as a community to offer love and support to those hurt in any way.
Again, so very overwhelmed by the hundreds of messages and love that has been expressed. Thank you for the continued prayers and support.  We are thankful for Gods sovereign protection.

 "You are my hiding place; You preserve me from trouble; You surround me with songs of deliverance. Selah." Psalm 32:7

Anita

Monday, April 15, 2013

Shook up.

We were just way to close to the bombings in Boston.
My mind is exhausted. After running 26.2 miles we walked over 3 more miles out of the city. I am very sorry after being saturated in the aftermath of the bombing and physically depleted I just have to go to bed.
I will share with you tomorrow how this attack effected me and my family. We had a different story of terror that was snowballed from the bombings.

THANK YOU, for the amazing responses to this tragedy. I have tried so hard to reply to the over 100 messages we have received. Please forgive me if I have missed anyone. I have had such a hard time updating and responding.
EVERY Message was READ and RECEIVED with GREAT GRATITUDE.
I am so overwhelmed with your support and love.

Thank you,
Anita

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Boston Marathon T minus 12 hours!

The morning started out quiet with the boys all sleeping. Taking full advantage of their heavy breathing I tip toed to the Keireg for coffee and my bible.


I really needed this quiet time. I wanted to take time and thank God for healing me. Just 2 days ago  I was so sick I was fighting question marks in my head.?????

T minus 12 HOURS till BOSTON!


I was able to enjoy coffee and a KIELBASA..Boston style today. If that didn't mess up my belly than I knew I was in like FLYNN!

Before we started our day out we met Father Daniel at Dunkin Donuts. He is running tomorrow and going for a 3:08 time...It seems weird to call a Priest a Beast..But in running lingo that is a HUGE compliment!

We did the Freedom Tour and learned a lot about the history of Boston.

That was a lot of walking but not too much.

Heading to bed, Very concerned about getting myself to the Back Bay Hilton on the trains! I have to change trains and I am nervous about running and now I am adding "Not getting on the wrong train" to the equation.
I just have to convince myself that God really did give me more than my legs..He gave me a brain too and I can use it!

Good Night all. I will try to get a write up tomorrow..Thank you all for the Prayers..They have really done miracles..Thank YOU.

Anita

Saturday, April 13, 2013

On My Knees



God sure knows how to put you on your knees...Like right in front of a hotel toilet! If you didn't read yesterdays post, SICK..than you may as well know I have the stomach FLU!

We got on the road later than we planned. Andy let me try and sleep. As we drove through New York by belly was still turning but I was able to keep everything down and in!

All the carb loading the past week is gone. Especially considering today my diet consisted of water and minimal bland foods.

We arrived in Boston where the anxiety went into full swing for Andy. We were trying to get to the Expo and the traffic was insane. These people are just going on like this was their normal. Andy was chewing the inside of his lip, clicking his teeth and desperately trying not to go postal.
After an hour of trying to find parking in the city we decided to head to the hotel and throw in the towel. As we were on our way out and going no where fast we found a parking structure!

After 3 hours of shopping at the expo and 30 dollars in parking we headed to our the hotel in Walthum.
Can You find ALEC?? The stick figure!
 I needed to run. My training had me running 5 miles-that was not going to happen.
I decided 30 minutes of running was as good as it was going to get. Between my knee giving me issues and my belly hating me I knew it would was best to keep it simple. 

The fresh air engulfed me and excited me. This was exactly what the DR ordered. As I ran I took the time to talk to God. And Listen.
I thought of all those who were praying for me. I thought how God could use me being sick to empower others to pray, love and encourage. I thought if hoovering over a toilet like an animal brought others to HIM than that is where I would wanted to be.

Crazy how God puts us on our knees...Humbled.

Adam GOUCHER!! Olympian, Husband to Kara &Author of Running the EDGE!!
 Heading to bed. Trying to catch up on some sleep. We were able to find a Chinese Restaurant and get take out. The had a healthy chicken and vegetable meal with no starch or sauce. It will sustain life and I pray stay DOWN!

Tomorrow we are taking the kids site seeing and I am going to try and meet Father Daniel. He is a Priest from Clarkston Michigan who is running Boston for the first time.

Also I want to say thank you to many people who have responded to my posts in prayer.

"May he grant you according to your hearts desire, and fulfill all of your purpose."
Psalm 20:4
Thank you Lacy R for sharing this scripture with me. 
Anita


SICK!

There is something humbling about bending over a hotel toilet retching your brains out.

After a 8 hour drive through Michigan, Canada and ending in New York my belly was feeling quite bloated. I chalked it up to "My waist band is too tight."
At 12:30 in the morning I quietly snuck off the bathroom.
And again at 1:30am and many many more times.
There is nothing girly about what my body was putting me through.
"How is this happening to me God?"
After wiping my face I crawled back into bed for the 4th or fifth time.
Even though I was sicker than snot I didn't have a fever.
I prayed.. And as I prayed there was no anxiety. I had no fear of not running Boston in 2 days.
Until I ran back to the bathroom at 3:30am.
It hurt soo bad. There was nothing left in me but a body weak and lifeless. My flesh turned clammy and my pjs were soaked. My skin was burning up. "What was happening to me?" I thought as my body was drenched with sweat.
I didn't think I could make it back to bed when Andy came and picked me up. The room was spinning and everything was getting dark, very very dark. I got concerned when I heard panic his voice. Not wanting him worry I said " I'll be ok."

It is 9:49 am. We have been driving now for an hour. I have drank 20 oz of water. ate a banana and took 3 Motrin.
We just let go and let God.
I am going to take it 1 hour at a time.
I have kept it all down.
Having you head in a toilet is as humbling as it comes.
Just another reminder GOD is in CONTROL.

Anita

Friday, April 12, 2013

26.2 miles of Prayers & Dedications. BOSTON

 The Power of Prayer is Immeasurable. I am Desperately Seeking YOUR Prayers. From the bottom of my heart I am asking you to PRAY for me on my Marathon.

The Marathon consists of 26.2 miles.  
If all goes the way I have trained I will be running 8:00 minute miles. I originally set this at 8:30. I was too scared to share that goal. But now it is out there.
I will leave my Corral crossing the starting line about 10:25am. You can use my Bib Number 13936 and TRACK me.  click here:    Track Anita
I have had several people not only assign a mile to PRAY for me but I have also had many DEDICATIONS. I will have those written on my arm to dedicate as I run their mile.

I am going to GO FOR it. I am going to try and PR. If I do "YA HOO"...And if I do not I will have the satisfaction of knowing that I Gave my ALL.
I am going to run till I puke, poop my pants or Pee down my legs..But I am going to give my all. I hope none of these happen but if they do...They DO!

JEREMIAH 33:3 "CALL UNTO ME AND I WILL ANSWER AND SHOW YOU GREAT AND MIGHTY THINGS WHICH THOUGH KNOWEST NOT."

I still have some miles I would like prayed for. Thank You to MOM and Kirsten my neighbor who said they would be praying for me through EVERY mile.

1.Nina , Tony
2.Nina
3. Jill B
4. Devon and Austin &Kimberly P.,  Jill B
5. Alec and Justin, Jill B
6. Jill B
7.Jill B
8. Patty G.
9.
10.
11.
12. Linda H & Michelle R
13. Becca Boo
14. Danielle M.
15. Terri W.
16.  AUNT Lois G.
17. Georgette A.
18.
19. Tiffany C
20.Holly P : Dedications: Travis and Eli
21.ARIEL ROSE..
22.Dedication: Preston M
23.Leeanne & Bobby
24.Michelle B.
25. Deb B.
26. Debbie Cottrel
.2.

Tomorrow we will be arriving in Boston. The expo is Tomorrow and RYAN HALL is going to be there!!
He is the ROCK STAR or running for me.
The weather is CRAPPY right now in New York. It is 37 degrees, windy and nasty.


I want to give a SHOUT OUT TO all those running the Martian Marathon Tomorrow. These martians are running in 39 degrees. Mother nature really invaded the course with a vengeance. My heart especially goes to Michelle B. You can do this Michelle B!!

And I also want to say thank you for the POWERFUL words from Paula. Tears welled in my eyes with her reminder
"that you hv the joy of the Lord on you. You hv worked hard, you are ready & you are blessed! His face shines upon you & Holy Spirit is your great comforter so enjoy lady..if it's not from HIM shake it off & leave it at the start line! Run like the wind! You got it in you!"
Anita

Training Program: Honoring your Body!

Today is the Last day to our series on Intentional Living. There are some incredible bloggers who really put this together and very talented writers that participated.

I haven't really wrote much on training our bodies but this is just as important I believe for our Christian walk.
Training our body does not mean incorporating a work out plan like Ryan Hall or any elite athlete. It means to be INTENTIONAL about it.
It is not Perfection it is Progress.

Luke 2:52 - "And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man."

Our bodies are made up of 4 components..Like legs on a chair.
Jesus grew in these 4 ways. This is how I have found I am at my healthiest is when I am balancing on these 4 legs. 
HE GREW INTELLECTUALLY - wisdom
HE GREW PHYSICALLY - stature
HE  GREW SPIRITUALLY - favor with God
HE GREW SOCIALLY - favor with man
 Cor. 6:19-20"Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's."  

 My mother had a petite frame and I wouldn't say that between 3 packs of cigarettes and all the beer and vodka, marijuana and pills she consumed she took great care of her body. Of course if you looked at her you wouldn't know that. But even with her 5'2 frame, weighing in at 110 lbs her body shut down from years of abuse way before her time or mine.
You can only fake it for so long, eventually it is going to catch up with you. Sure you see that person like my mom who lives to be as old as Moses abusing their body, but that might not be you...

Most Christians feel convicted about lying, or gossiping or we describe sin as pornography, addiction or adultery, all the obvious but no one wants to touch on gluttony with a ten foot pole. 
A lot of our churches encourage over eating. My teen age years I went to a Baptist church and there was always a potluck and the coffee table after service was almost hidden behind dozens of donuts. I have even watched Pastors grab their bellies laughing about their figure and the food they consume. It has almost become a joke. I don't think it is a laughing matter when you look at the obesity in the United States.
The number one KILLER in the United States  is coronary heart disease, which often appears as a heart attack.  No it wasn't alcoholism or drug overdose. We weigh the obvious sins and hide our "little indulgences." Most of even our Pastors are over weight. We hear all the time the Reverend who drinks but never the one who is overweight.

It is not about going on a diet, it is changing your diet for life. It is NOT about being skinny or fat..IT is about being Healthy!
You are What You EAT!!
Some people do not even know that they are unhealthy. They think that chronic fatigue, headaches, soreness or acne is just a way of life. They don't know anything else. There is so much more. Life has so many more possibilities. I never realized the significance of the foods I consumed affected my daily outcomes till running.  There is Proof  In The Pudding!..LOL..Pudding!  When I ate proper foods I could run longer, I recovered faster and I was able to pursue my day without exhaustion or a bad attitude.
A BAD ATTITUDE. GARBAGE IN GARBAGE OUT!!!
When we learn how to eat properly a bi-product of eating right is thinking right! When we are honoring God with managing the body he gave us we will also be honoring him with a mind that is disciplined, dedicated and sacrificing.

    "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship." Rom. 12:1

You can't serve the Lord on the earth from an early grave. You won't do all you could for Christ from your sickbed or sleeping off the sugar blues. You won't serve the Lord to full capacity if you're too ashamed of yourself to minister to others. Our health is vitally important to God. Christians, more than any other people, need to eat to live, not live to eat.

Does that mean I never indulge?
I love chocolate, ice cream, root beer, oh and Girl Scout Cookies.. But I watch portion, I look for healthier alternatives and sometimes I just treat myself. We all need a day to enjoy. Dieting is not DAY by DAY it is a way of living. So with doing all our routines a day of rest is good.

I would love to hear what you think of this post. I pray I did not offend anyone. At 38 years old I am so thankful to God for allowing me to do the things I can. It hasn't been easy for me. 2 knee surgeries should have couched me. I praise GOD every time I run. I give God all the Glory remembering how thankful I am for each breath of air he has given me. So for each breath I give him the honor and remember HE GAVE ME Life not to take for granted but to glorify him~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Are you balanced? 
Where do you feel off balance? 
Do you struggle with your eating Habits?
Do you struggle with staying physically active? 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Here are all 5 topics I am posting this week. Today is day 3. Make sure you check out the other posts to qualify you for the GIVEAWAY!!! Click on the Post you have not read and share in the Devotion*
  1. The Little Engine who COULD
  2. Rules to Running your Own Race
  3. Running Down Your Thoughts
  4. Running From Ourselves
  5. Training Program
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CONTEST: At the end of the 5 Day Series if you have commented on the questions on all 5 days I will send out a care package that will be related to health and fitness. 
  • RULES
  • You HAVE to be a subscriber to the blog.
  • You have to answer or comment on the post. 
  • At the end I will contact you to receive your address.
  • IF by chance there are more than 5 participants I will Draw 3 names. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT THE OTHER 16 BLOGGERS!! These other bloggers are incredible. You will not want to miss what they have to say about Living Life Intentionally.
Click here to View their Topic: 5 Days of Intentional Living

Thank You for visiting. If you are a new visiter this week I would love to see that you visited, Let me know what  you think~
Anita


Thursday, April 11, 2013

Running from Ourselves: Grief

It was 6 months ago that my world imploded. There are days when it seems like yesterday that I lost my niece. She was not a niece that you saw once in a while or during holidays. She was that niece that had her own room at your house, that niece that called at all hours and for anything. She was that niece that you never told "No" to or that you always said "Yes' to. "Ariel" was that niece that showed up dressed like you and could have conversations with one another yet never speak a word. "Ariel" was that niece that was more like my daughter than anything. I would climb to the moon and back for her and I would fight all of Hell for her. She was only 21 when she died of a tragic car accident last October.
A part of me died that day and parts of me wilted away for many many weeks. I forgot how to live, I forgot how to breathe..how to converse..I was lost in myself and my grief often with no intention but to stay inverted and safe within myself and away from others.

Everywhere you go you have to deal with people. There are days when we can not look at ourselves let alone others. There are days when the best you have is nothing at all. 
Sometimes we feel so empty and alone, so depleted that we have nothing to share.
For months every time someone asked how I was doing I would reply "Fine."
FINE FINE FINE FINE FINE FINE...Over and Over and Over again, redundant, repetitive and the absolute BEST I had...FINE!
I was conscious of my answer, It was thought out and I never thought I would ever be consciously able answer anything else but "FINE".

 I have tears on every road where I live. Miles and miles I have ran and cried. I have soaked the pavement and wiped so much snot on my sleeves that there was not a dry arm. The tears were often frozen to my cheeks and my eyelashes were like icicles.
I cried out to God. I tried to bargain with God. I was angry and confused. Even as I write this the tears flow because I still have waves of these emotions.
Psalm 30:5
"Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."
This week I was at Home Depot and I caught myself smiling. I felt Joy and I was aware of it. I was aware that I was HONESTY better than FINE. I was aware at that moment that I had answered for a couple weeks "Good"!  And it was subconscious and genuine.

In Grief there are many voices that run through our head. No matter how far we run we can not run from ourselves. And we can not run from God.
Grief is not just the loss of people..it is the loss of ANYTHING.
You feel grief when you loose a dream or a friendship. You encounter grief when you loose a job or a your life has been flipped up side down. Grief is in addiction and in sickness.

We battle just staying afloat. We battle the thoughts that ruminate in our heads. We need a voice bigger than our own. Because MOST battles we fight are not between US and others...It is between US and OURSELVES!

Many of us encounter Grief to some extent. Maybe you have not lost a loved one but you have other loss and can relate to the battle for Joy.
In our Heartache we think that it is justifiable enough to stay in the pit.  We have earned it. We can be mad, angry and depressed..
But NO..We have to battle for Joy, Love, Peace, Contentment...And Acceptance.

In my loss of loosing the most beautiful girl in my world I have to consciously remind myself it is NOT about ME.  And I have to desperately try to remind myself she was HIS first: he gave her to me on loan. It doesn't wipe away my tears but it allows me to manage them better.
It allows me to fight the voices that want to hinder me and hide me. 
It allows me to die to myself and put my loss in perspective.

 Psalm 48:14
"For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end."

No matter what loss you are encountering you will NEVER have the Loss of HIM. 


1. What Loss Are you struggling with today? The loss of finances, dreams, friendships, family, health.....
2. How are YOU fighting with Yourself??
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here are all 5 topics I am posting this week. Today is day 3. Make sure you check out the other posts to qualify you for the GIVEAWAY!!! Click on the Post you have not read and share in the Devotion*
  1. The Little Engine who COULD
  2. Rules to Running your Own Race
  3. Running Down Your Thoughts
  4. Running From Ourselves
  5. Training Program
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CONTEST: At the end of the 5 Day Series if you have commented on the questions on all 5 days I will send out a care package that will be related to health and fitness.
  • RULES
  • You HAVE to be a subscriber to the blog.
  • You have to answer or comment on the post. 
  • At the end I will contact you to receive your address.
  • IF by chance there are more than 5 participants I will Draw 3 names. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DON'T FORGET TO CHECK OUT THE OTHER 16 BLOGGERS!! These other bloggers are incredible. You will not want to miss what they have to say about Living Life Intentionally.
Click here to View their Topic: 5 Days of Intentional Living Series.


ANITA