Where I was 7 years ago..Gratitude.

The Strongest Man I know!

I was getting the boys ready like it seemed I was doing all the time. Alone. Here I was getting the boys ready to go to HIS sisters house to celebrate her birthday. This seemed unfair. He wasn't here for Christmas Eve, Christmas day, her birthday and he said he has to work New years Eve and New Years day. I may as well be a single parent I thought to myself.
I was going to have to answer the same questions. Where's Andy? Oh, He had to work again?
Constantly answering for him. I was thankful that he had a good job but all these hours were crazy and unfair to me. I wanted a husband and my kids needed a father. I did everything alone.

Somewhere in between going through the motions of the birthday party and returning home on that cold December day everything went horribly wrong. My life as I knew it was going to be ripped out from under me.
It was all in slow motion yet my mind could not catch up to understand what was being said. There was Andy on the basement floor on his knees with tears draining down his cheeks.
Andy pulled in the driveway when I did coming home and right behind him was his mom and dad. What was going on? why was everyone here at 10pm. Andy should still be at work and mom and dad should be at home......
Here I sat looking at this man I have been married to for over 7 years and I couldn't understand what he was saying or even recognize him.  His Dad was sitting next to me, Why? What?
Something about drugs, work, a Dr, Rehab.... WHAT? What was Andy saying? What was going on. He is a drug addict? WHAT?? NOO this can not be. How could he? Why would he? ...........7 years ago.

I have watched God work in Andrew for 7 years now. "Failure is not an option"  a motto Andrew reminds himself of in staying clean from drugs. It puts tears in my eyes to witness Gods grace and mercy in his life. To watch God mold Andrew into the man he had always intended him to be. Not just a husband or a father but a spiritual leader. 

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new

 "In sickness and in health, for better and for worse, From affliction and addiction to resurrection to restoration!! 

Hebrews 12:10-11
Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

The road has not been easy. But Andy has discovered a healthy alternative for coping. RUNNING. He runs down the old man, He runs down the demons. He runs after Life, Love and Christ. Training not just his body but his mind. A man after my own heart! 

He has been clean, no breaks and no days off:7 years!!! He is the strongest man I know. I fall in love with him every day. 

The Rundown:

Snap Fitness: 20 minutes bike, 20 minutes elliptical, 26 minutes Dreadmill:Repeats. 3 miles..UGH!! 

Anita

Merry Christmas 2011~

We arrived at Church at 10:35am. A little late but we were all still smiling. The morning was falling into place which is more than I can say the snow did this Christmas! The sun was shining and the day was beautiful, we parked the car and headed into the service that had already started.
Dad, an usher, greeted me with a quirky smile, got real close and whispered in my ear " I Love You".
These simple three words represented so much.
For one Dad loves to see his children going to church. He is so proud. It is an honor to him.
For two, Not having a dad myself he is also so sympathetic to expressing his fatherly love for me that I may not feel alone.
And Keeping it Simple at THREE, this is where the quirkiness comes into play, "I Love YOU....Nita..." Which with the proper tone you really hear.."Thanks for making me laugh, I love you, you are one of a kind, Ohh Nita...."
YOU see what you're missing is the timeline BEFORE 10:30am..... It went like THIS:
Got up at scheduled time- awakened by Austin at 6:30am. Made COFFEE...makes everything MERRIER.
Grabbed hidden presents in my closet and stocking stuffers...Ahh..Stocking Stuffers..where were they at??
"Oh noo, where are they at"?" Where did I put them?" My mind went upside down and inside out.
"Its OK, I will just call mom and I am sure she will remember where I put them, after all she did help me wrap them." My mind was going frantic. I called mom and dad answered the phone. I thought to myself,remember the most important thing is Christ, not goofy stocking stuffers. "Hi mom, Merry Christmas......" Mom chuckled as I unfolded my story. She was calm and sweet. "No, Nita, I do not have them......"   "NO". One word, one syllable and the only word I didn't want to hear! And all the other words she said I didn't hear! JUST NO!

A family tradition, taking turns to read In Luke The Real Christmas story. The Birth of Jesus.

I was determined to remain merry and focused. I didn't advertise that I had lost them I just made adjustments exchanging and rearranging.
"Glory to God in the highest, and on Earth peace, good will toward men" (Luke 2:14).

Warrior Dash 2012!! Look Out team Harless is coming!

I looked calm as a cucumber by the time the family came down. And as we read the Christmas story in Luke there was nothing but peace and joy that filled the room.
We opened gifts, laughed and I even got a bigger chuckle when I watched Andy looking for gifts he lost. After we finished opening presents and cleaning a forest of wrapping paper I started making the stuffing. I lifted the turkey into the sink and took it out of  the brine it had been in for the past 36hours . As I finished the stuffing I had the biggest brain fart OHH MYLANTA! I forgot to buy a roasting pan for the turkey!!!! True STORY! What am I going to put this 21lb beast in?
Breath, remain calm. This is such a Anita move. Quick..call MOM.
2 distress calls from me in  2 hours.
Poor mom, she must think I am crazy. Her mind was twirling as her thoughts were being verbalized on the phone with me. My thoughts were being interrupted quickly with voices of desperation and embarrassment.
Within what felt like hours but were only seconds mom had it all figured out and once again came to my rescue like a super hero!
"I Love You... Nita..." This is what dad meant as he whispered in my ear!

Turkey~

Christmas was wonderful. I was having the family all over my house. Andy's family. There is really nothing left of mine. Alcoholism has disintegrated my family. My brother and sister both live down in Florida and phone calls are our only way of celebrating. My sister like most sisters is sentimental and soft. My brother is a guy. I stopped placing expectations on him because it always hurt when he wouldn't call.  Or when he wouldn't remember my birthday just 5 days earlier...

More than just Words~

But as I opened my card this Christmas morning from my brother and his wife there was an unfamiliar hand writing on the card. And it was signed Bobby. I could hardly read through the tears. I could not remember the last time I had seen his handwriting. This was the second most powerful words that I had read. Right behind  "For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the LORD" (Luke 2:11). Something has been stirring in my brother the past year. I am going to continue to pray over him. Never give up on loved ones. I have been blessed more by my brothers actions the last year than I have in years. And I know it is only the beginning....
Soon after that Andy has made it a tradition to write me a Christmas letter. This is different every year. It describes failures, achievements, love, goals, and whatever has stirred Andys heart. My letter this year was about accomplishments and the middle of adversity. It is my favorite gift. I keep them all. The gifts can come and go but his words and love are most valuable to me.

 Exhaustion. I crawled into bed somewhere around 10:30. We had served dinner  and dessert along with more gifts more laughs and more clean up! No matter what, I was sleeping in!!
8:30..YUP that's when got up, but not when I crawled out of my den. at 8:45 there was a cup of coffee in my hand and a smile painted across my face. It was so amazing. I was not going anywhere! That was the Plan...
My body needed detoxing. I knew this lingering cold was due to all the sugar my body had ingested the last week. Grandmas Oatmeal.( raisins, Irish cut oats, flax seed, wheat germ, cinnamon, almonds,salt &butter) 


Andy called to tell me he would be home some where around 2. 

Andy wanted to go to Indian Springs! I was so excited!! So much for not going anywhere! I could try some of my new presents out!!

Crazy runner in shorts!! Only one on trail in em'!

The Rundown 

Time:1:11

Pace:8:52

Distance:8:01

Austin Bought me some winter running socks! They were awesome today!

"Love one another deeply, from the heart." 1Peter 1:22

Anita