Another ROUND

 "So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air."

 1 Cor. 9:26

Have you ever watched a boxing match and one guy is just getting pulverized? And you say to yourself, "Just stay down!" 

But he doesn't. 

I think maybe that is a trait I have grown accustomed to, not staying down. 

Going another round

Tuesday, I was diagnosed with Covid. A slight headache and a huge prodding from the holy spirit to get tested. 

I found myself quarantined to a 10'10'  spare bedroom. This is where I have resided the last 8 days. 

• No fever in 4 days.
• I had the monoclonal antibodies.
• I finished 1 packet of steroids 
• I have read 1 novel.
• I have listened to countless podcasts
• I watched one tv series.
• Watched 3 sermons.
• I painted a half dozen rocks.
• Sunday, I ran 5 miles
• Monday, I ran 10 miles
• Today I walked 3miles. 

And so we get back up and get back in the ring of life. We can't stay down for long. 

We don't cry "Poor Me". 

More like "Why not me?" 

If I wanted to sulk I have plenty of circumstances that I could juggle and let steal my Joy but that isn't a option. 

I have Bear Lake Ultra in 11 days! 

I am grateful the weekend before I was diagnosed I was able to run 40 miles, a 20 miler, a 15 miler and a 5 miler. 

My training is a bit botched but I am not throwing in the towel. I am going another round. 

I was very fatigued after I ran both times and I could feel more struggle to get my heart rate down. In those moments of being winded, I would add a walk break and try to listen to my body. 

The little things:

If you can not find joy in the little things you will not appreciate the big things. 

Before my feet ever touch the backroads I was grinning from ear to ear. 

It is beautiful out. I get to feel the warm sun against my skin. I get to smell the sweetness of the breeze as it gently blows my hair. 

I am aware of the birds chirping and the black-eyed Susan's hidden in the fields. 

I am all present. I am all in. I am able. And I am capable. 

My vision is not on my sickness, the missed opportunities or the events cancelled. My thoughts are not going down that rabbit hole. I need to keep my chin up, stay positive and keep fighting. 

Where is my perspective, my vision, it is on the dream. 

If I was going to get Covid, this was a perfect week to get it! 

11 days, a 24 hour race. This was going to be my "A Race" of the year. Every race I did was designed to build up to Bear Lake. 

I am back up, by the grace of God I am running again. I am wiping the salt from my brow and getting back in the ring. 

I have no idea what Bear Lake will look like but for now, I optimistic. I am not going to overthink it. I reached out to Ryan L. He had Covid back in April and ran 2 weeks later. I am very encouraged by this.

I may have gotten knocked down this week but God has realigned me. He is strengthening me. He is equipped me.  He is for me. He is on the sidelines cheering me on and reminding me to get back out there. 

This week has been a sentimental week. 

September 22 was my fathers birthday. He died at 48. 

September 25 was 2 YEARS cancer free!

September 27 was my mothers birthday. She died at 52. 

As I celebrated my 2 years in the middle of both birthdays, I wondered if my parents would be proud of me? 

I wanted to scream out to them, "I FOUGHT mom and dad, I Fought so hard mom and dad, I fought for you, I fought for you when you were weak, I fought for you when you were alone, I fought when the fight didn't seem worth fighting,,, I FOUGHT, I fought mom and dad..." 

I can see them...so far away..."..you did my daughter, when we quit fighting you never quit...." 

And so, In 11 days, I will fight again. I will run for 24 hours. I will beat myself up, I will suffer, I will torture myself because I am reminded to FIGHT.  It is in those dark disturbing moments I am so empty, I am so depleted that I Hear God so loud, I feel God so passionately. It is in my weakness, that I am strong in Him. 

Most of us are actively fighting for things that have already been given to us. I wish I could have taught that to my parents. 

Anita~

"I do because I can, I can because I want to, I want to because you said I couldn't."