A Demon called Cancer.

The days get dark, colliding into one another. 

The pain spreads in all places

I reach out.

I crawl out. 

It hurts. 

I fight this demon called Cancer. 

He is Ruthless. 

Evil.

A Tyrant. 

He wants my dreams.

He wants my sleep.

He wants my tomorrows. 

He wants my joys.

He wants my days. 

He wants my motherhood. 

He wants my peace.

He wants my marriage. 

He wants breath. 

I reach out.

I crawl out. 

It hurts. 

I crawled out today.

I crawled out to smell the flowers. 

I crawled out to feel the breeze against my skin.

I crawled out to taste, if only it was sweet. 

I crawled out to touch the blades of grass in my fingers. 

I crawled out to love, the sweetness of love. 

For that Smile, For Hope, For Laughter, For the sun hugging me close...I reach out.
Today, I reached out after a really hard weekend.
The hours seem to never end when you are hurting. Food tasted like metal. I couldn't drink anything, it all tasted so foul. I forced myself to eat, picking at food.
My body was weak. My heart raced, palpitating without rhythm. Bloated, thick, full of chemicals. Sweating, so much sweating.
Exhausted yet sleepless.

Today, I did the BEST I could. I so wanted to run. I also wanted to stay in bed.
I called a friend to help me.
I got 12 miles in, mostly walking. So grateful for each mile.  I did WHAT I COULD. I was able to embrace "The Lil Things" in a BIG way.
Grateful for what I COULD do, letting go of what I couldn't do.

"WEEEEEE" I think I tinkled a lil bit! 

The idea is to do the best you can. Don't give up. Don't let that demon have you. Keep Fighting.

Anita~

2Timothy 1:7 "For I know the plans for you, declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you. plans to give you hope and a future."