As fatigue sets in, often times us runners don't pick up our feet and find ourselves tripping over anything from a stump to a baby twig. I believe the roots have claws and just reach up and pull me down but the real truth is I am a KLUTZ.
I was on a mission today, therefore: when I tripped I quickly tucked in and rolled out. I jumped to my feet wiping the black dirt off my hands and watch, noticing I had lost 6 seconds.
"Go, Go Anita..."
I couldn't sleep, I was awake at 5am. I tried so hard to fall back to sleep. I finally succumbed to the idea my day was going to start at 6am.
"Andy, What time do you run the West loop with the Lake loop?" I wanted to run this 5 mile loop X's 2 today. I wasn't thinking I could beat his time but I was giving it great consideration that I was going to try like a son of a gun to come close.
My health has really messed my running times up. I have gotten slower and weaker the last couple years. Andy has been killing it on the trails. I was hoping to come close to his 46 minute loop. But running 10 miles, 2 loops- I would be lucky to do 50 minutes a loop.
"On your toes Anita, pick em up set em down...." I was having so much fun going down the hills. Roots, rocks and switchbacks, I let my body relax as I hugged the trail. I felt so good, too good, I was concerned it would all come to an end.
I glanced down at my watch with each passing mile. 4 miles I finally got my groove. My breathing started to relax and my body accepted the delightful suffering.
I could see the break in the trees, the parking lot was just a few feet away.
45:49.
I had to look at it twice. I smiled with total JOY and gratitude. "Thank You God."
And then I sent a picture to Andy!
Not very lady like I captioned my photo...
"Suck it."
"Oh wow!!! Andy replied. I know he was as shocked as I was.
I responded "Gotta get loop two! Maintain?!
Andy replied. "No way. That's pretty impressive. Is that with the lake?"
"Yep"
And of course in typical Andy fashion, he is soooo competitive he adds "U cheated somehow."
I actually was so surprised myself I began to question my run.
"Did I forget to add the loop" I tried to rack my brain but I was trying so hard to run strong I really didn't pay attention to signs.
I conclude "Well lets see how the second loop goes!"
Like a bat out of hell I ran back into the woods.
"Stay strong Anita, stay light, on your toes...." The trail was so gnarly. I really had to pay attention. Rather than getting tired I found myself gaining strength from each mile goal I hit.
I WAS DOING IT. I was getting so stoked. I prepared myself for each hill. "RUN IT NITA, go go go, get up." I cried out loud with no shame. I wondered why I hadn't seen any turkey or deer. But at the top of each hill I knew why, I was huffing and puffing, surly scaring off any wildlife for miles. I half expected to at least see some fox or coyote looking to scavenge me, I sounded like a dying animal.
I ran all the hills, I hauled butt cruising fearlessly on the downhills. NO fear. You can't hit the downhills with fear, then you tense up and are more likely to fall and injure yourself. RELAX, breath, pick up your feet and tap tap tap. You gotta be swift and light. Oh the downhills are SOOO FUN!
I realized I forgot to eat. I pulled out a cheese stick in my pocket. The clock was ticking, I had to eat on the run. No time to waste. I really wanted to beat Andy. OH, did I want to give him a run for his money, I could almost taste it...
And of course that when I fell! Head over heals. I tried not to get too discouraged. I heard voices from this week, "Anita, maybe this is God trying to tell you not to run anymore...." It rang over and over in my head.
"NO, Anita, NO...God Loved me..." Why do people want to take your passions away and claim it as Gods doing?
"Get Behind me Satan!" And I dug my heels in deeper trying to make up that 6 seconds!
I saw my exit, up and out, Pronto Nita...I can do it, I am MexiCAN...I can! I Can!
44:15.
THE BIGGEST smile went across my face. I felt soo good. I had HOPE for the first time in months. All these health issues have put in a slumber.
I may never be what I was, and I am good with that, but today I had HOPE.
Today, I felt good, I didn't get sick, I felt strong and encouraged.
Romans 15:13
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."
Hope..Hope gives us something to cling to, hang from, hold onto.
Hope is the little flame that says we are not Giving up. We are going to keep our Faith, We are not going to Quit. We are going to Believe in the process. And Beleive in His will.
Hope tells me, I am loved. Hope tells me He believes in Me. Hope tells me He is passionate about my passions.
Hope.
Anita
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