Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Heathen. Mental Mess

I was sitting at the kitchen table making ham and cheese sandwiches when my phone went off. "Who is texting me at 6:10 in the morning." I thought.
It is never a good thing to have messages or phone calls that early.
It was Jeff, bailing on me.

I was up and at it, my clothes were laid out and my gym bag was by the front door, but I had no motivation to go, I had no motivation to anything. I suddenly wanted to go back to bed.

Before the thought turned to action I quickly sent out a distress call to Ken asking if he would meet me.
But he wasn't biting either.

Just when I was about to give up and succumb to the idea I was going solo, Claudia invited me to run with her!

I met Claudia and MaryAnn at 11AM at Indian Springs for 8 miles.

It was great. After we finished I looked at the time. I had to pick up my nephew to babysit at 1pm. I had a little extra time. I looked at the bare sledding hill. "HEY girls, wanna run up the hill?"
After a slight pause, we were all running up together. MaryAnn somehow convinced us to run down the other side and back up again.
Before our lungs realized they were burning we all were smiling.

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I was asked to attend the young ladies small group at church. The leader thought I would have some wisdom to share with the young ladies. They were studying Titus 2:3-5. It discusses the older woman in the church teaching the younger ones.
I was definitely the older woman this evening.

I showed up modestly dressed, more modest than usual.  I studied the verses. I struggled in my mid January emotional mess. I felt unequipped.
Before I left I sent this selFie to Andy to ask his opinion of my attire. I like to get his thoughts. Simple. I did add lip gloss. A girl cant go out without lips gloss unless your RUNNING!

Then my emotions were confirmed when I turned on my truck and the song "HEATHENS" was on the radio. Seriously, I know the song is overplayed but what were the odds.
And I was convicted even more with this secular music coming out of my speakers. I needed some Casting Crowns, some Jeremy Camp, or my favorite, David Crowder.

Too many dreary days. It is messing with me. The chatter in my head is louder. My mind is a battlefield. My focus is off, I am really struggling with me.

The group was great. The girls were very sweet. It was exactly what I needed.


Something else I Need...I need some sunshine. I am a MESS.
A few things that make me smile in Gloomy Weather:
  • My boys smiling at me right before they ask me for something.
  • Chocolate, preferable dark chocolate..and a delicate truffle, I am puddy.
  • Hot tea, I have a cup almost every afternoon or evening, it relaxes me.
  • Fuzzy Blankets.
My computer is dying...Nite

Anita




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