PRIDE

Stubborn.
Strong Willed
Headstrong

Yeah, I would say I contain a portion of these. I have many ingredients for disaster in my make up. I am my own worst enemy. I think it is fair to say that when managed that these character traits are also great traits for perseverance. WHEN MANAGED!

I am a pistol, no question about it. I have a handful of haters. Most of us do. You would be surprised by those that are in the Hater Club. I have days that I care, too much. But for the most part God realigns my focus back to him. He usually always brings someone around me to remind me I am LOVED, I am not the Antichrist. That I am not then Enemy.

"It's PRIDE F**#%(@  with you." Andy, back in his heathen season would say this to me. I can still hear those words as foul as they were. Those characteristic traits were a product of PRIDE when unmanaged.

"Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight." Isaiah 5:21

After a while you have to just let go. Pride like to HANG ON.
Let them talk about you. Let them Defriend you, block you or send you a letter..
Bury your PRIDE and EXAMINE YOURSELF. QUIT examining everyone else and playing the victim. I have to do MY self Inventory.
POOR Anita? UGH
I think NOT.
I don't need to gather a team together to support the injustice directed at me. If I have a problem I go to that brother or sister, most of the time. Sometimes, I have found that it just isn't a battle that is ever going to be won. In this case, I just let it go.

God has really beat me down. He gives me a sip or water, a minute to catch my breath and he comes back at me. But it is because I am Stubborn, Strong Willed and Headstrong. He is trying to beat that PRIDE out of me.

My Running is NO DIFFERENT.
Every Run I am so thankful. It feels like the first time I ran.
I missed the vibrant blue sky and perfect day to run. Then I reminded myself..I CAN RUN, it wasn't about the weather conditions, it was about the health of my legs. That made it Perfect.

I had 30 minutes. I changed knowing the sun was setting. The sky was still clear, the air was cold and crisp. It would be dark on my way back home. I grabbed my reflective vest and a light. Quickly running through the house gather my layers I found myself getting so pumped.  I suddenly didn't care that I was squeezing my run in, I was excited for the gift to run at that moment. And oddly enough,  the conditions seemed even more perfect.

RUNNING in the Dark. I started out with my headphones in to get me juiced. But the darker it got, the more crooked the road bent, the more creeped out I got. I needed to hear everything. I needed to hear if a dog was going to make kibbles and bits out of me. Or if a funky windowless van came up from behind me. I wanted to hear if a coyote decided to get frisky with me. Then I needed to hear myself think as I devised a plan for every scenario!

5 tips for running in the DARK.

1. Turn off the Headphones.
2. Wear Reflective wear.
3. Take your phone with you, I get lost in the daylight, the nighttime gets really confusing!
4. Run Against Traffic

RUNDOWN:
Distance: 3 miles of awesomeness

At the end of the Day, I am the same as I was in the beginning..A nothing. My righteousness is of filthy rags. I have failed you, I have failed myself and I will do it again. Not because I want to, just because I have far far from arrived. But this stubburn, strong willed nothing will try to be better with each breath.

Anita