Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Setting Boundaries

4 Miles. I ran 4 miles with Erin. She text me last night to see if I wanted to run with her this morning. I love running with people. I miss running with partners. For that matter, I miss a lot these days.
  1. I miss running with Danielle
  2. I miss running mileage
  3. I miss running with passion
  4. I miss running speedy
  5. I miss being sore from running
  6. I miss running pain free
  7. I miss hills and repeats and tempo runs and all that goes along with the hard training.
Oh Jeesh, I miss so much. I am thankful that I can run at all. I am just trying to maintain some kind of miles to be able to run the Detroit Marathon in the fall.
I worry about if I will be able to run the marathon.
I worry about if I will be able to train pain free.
I worry about if I will be able to run the CRIM, which I have not even signed up for yet.
I hate that I even worry about all this. But I do.

I tell people all the time to not worry, and I am not good at doing it myself.

Even outside of running, There is so much stress going on with the home front.

Running has always been my best outlet. It is my quiet time with myself and God. But I struggle with that time because the pain interrupts my thoughts.

Running has allowed me to organize facts from emotions. It has allowed me to discern others peoples emotions that they try to direct at me.
It is always a challenge to do the right thing when it feels wrong. And sometimes it feels wrong to do the right thing.
But it is THE RIGHT THING.

The Thoughts RUNNING In My HEAD:
I can not engage in negativity, purposely.  We all have issues. Some of us choose to work on them and some of us choose to blame others for how we feel or the place we are in.
BUILD A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT.
God knows I have a plenty of people I could blame a million bad choices I have made on.
But in the end..They were MY choices.
I CHOOSE what I will do with the cards I am dealt with. I choose who I let love me or hurt me.
I choose to be happy or sad in my circumstances.
I choose who I want in my circle.

And MY CIRCLE has to consist of people who LOVE ME. People who are going to make me a better person. I am not a VICTIM. I don't play that card. If someone doesn't like me or is nasty to me I am NOT going to invite them in my CIRCLE to continue to bleed negativity and hurt into my life.
I MAKE the CHOICE though.
I have to find the courage to stay clear of those who are discouraging, hurtful, discontent and HAPPY to bring me down to their level.
Proverbs 15:1
"A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."   
Have the Courage to set boundaries. Make them in LOVE, not with bitterness or resentment. Love your enemies and pray for them. It is not always easy to love those who are not nice to you, you can love them from a healthy distance often times better.
Boundaries are not set up to keep you OUT, they are set up to keep ME in the best place I can be.
They are made not to punish, hurt or discipline others, they are set up to strengthen, build, and recover who I am supposed to be.
Boundaries are not designed in fear, hate or anger, but in love, courage and healing.

Anita

3 comments:

  1. I miss you too!! Next week right?!!! That plunger therapy looks crazy! Hope it is helping. I know this is so hard on you, but remember if you push too hard now it will only keep you out longer! Stay safe, love ya and we will catch up soon! Xoxo

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